Today, I just wanna nap all day, ya know?
My stomach was making a racket and woke me up. Literally. My hungry tum-tum growled me awake. I decided to mix the snack and breakfast for a larger meal, cause seriously, I wanted to eat a small well-done, oh, bear, maybe, buffalo, or a grilled Yeti. Something meaty and big.
I didn't have any meat on hand except the ham steak I am making for supper (one of the holdouts from the pre-plan shopping), so it was the usual eggs, toast, milk nanner, coffee, water. But I added cheese to the egg whites and some Cubanelle pepper.
Have no idea yet what lunch will be, but I'm guessing a salad and yogurt of some sort, since supper will have ham, carb, veggie combo.
I was having mild, but persistent, hunger pangs last night. They lasted for an hour, then calmed down. I kept saying, "Not an option. Eating is not an option"-- like a mantra.
Am so sore. We worked the back muscles (those torso raises, youch) and other muscles, but my back I feel a lot today. Butt some, abdomen some. But the back and shoulders....wooo.
I will admit to a bit of worry about the walking. I was fine yesterday cause it was short and hubby was with me and breeze was lovely. My foot went numb toward the end of the faster-walking portion, but recovered soon after we got home. See, I have this thing--since the early 90's--where my left leg and foot will go numb and my foot drags if I walk at a brisk, steady pace for anything above a certain time frame. Usually it's 13 to 15 minutes. No matter the warm-up. No matter the shoe. It happens on sidewalks and treadmills. If I go at a slow pace, I can walk a lot longer. But as soon as I get up to, say around 2.5 or more MPH (tested that out on treadmill), the foot numbs and starts to drag and I can't walk. If I walk slowly, I can walk for more than an hour.
When I used to use my treadmill (a relic now) regularly, I could walk my 45 mins if I went around 2.4 MPH. That's a slowish walk. I've spents hours meandering in sneakers with hubby, and while my plantar fasciitis will act up, the knee tends to be okay as long as the pace is gentle.
This might be due to compensations I've made in 20+ years with a messed up L knee. Dunno, and have sort of not gone back to the Orthopedic dude. I don't want surgery, so there ya go. I'm a wuss. Hubby and I decided to consider returning my knee to the Ortho after I get under 200. If I have to have surgery, I wanna be able to have the flexibility, mobility, and better weight to handle it.
So, for now, the brisk walk portion is minimal and I can handle it. Beyond the 10 mins does worry me. Ah, well. We'll cross the bridge when the bridge shows up in my view.
I took a peek at the scale (yeah, I'm an impatient ass) and I'm not happy. Yes, it's lower than Sunday's weigh-in, but for the working out (more than usual) and the eating (way less than usual), I frankly expected more on the 4th day if I'm gonna hit the 2 lbs loss by Sunday next.
It reminded me of my freak-out back in December when I did the 1200 for 5 days and weighed MORE than the previous week and then just overate in a childish, emotional reaction. I recovered from that pretty fast (you know, back on the horse and all), but this is the same scenario. Eating way less, seeing unstellar scale results.
It's silly of me, I know, but even INTJ's known for more rational approaches can be silly. I know that the soup I had for dinner could be partly to blame. I know it could be my body doing whatever little odd thing it does when I cut calories at first (like it did last month). I know it's just holding on and results will show up.
So, same thing as last month, but I am NOT gonna freak. No way. It's a longish (relatively, emotionally speaking) way to May 1. Short in terms of actual days, but long in the sense of the higher deprivation and higher expectations.
I'm in it. I"m doing it. I'm not gonna let the scale wreak havoc on my spirit.
I wish "the Math" were more exact and precise and each day showed the actual equation working through to Tanita-san. But The Body is there, not just The Math, and the infinite variations of chemicals and intake and output and it's a matter of the longer view--it will sort out. It will. Just not day to day exactly as we wish.
And I really do wanna nap. :)
But I won't. I'm trying to fix my weird sleep schedule, so staying awake right now is imperative.
Now I have to have something hot. My nose and ears are having some allergic stuffiness today. Sucks. Bleh.
I'll probably add stuff to this post later, but right now, let's get through Friday and it's temptations. If you only check blogs on weekdays, I wish you the best and healthiest of weekends. Ta!
~~~
Evening update: Lunch was fine. Water is fine. Did squats (3 sets, then knee began painfully stabbing...oh, well. Sigh.)
I have been looking at my blogrolls (this blog, old blog) and deciding if I should winnow out the folks who haven't been updating. I did that once before. When do you decide to remove blogs? After they're quiet a week, two, a month? More?
I'm also wondering about some blogs I visit. A few of them never, ever, ever drop me a comment. Makes me wonder if I should say, "Okay, no more comments for you, either." Dunno. I have no problem lurking and reading and enjoying, but if I leave a half-dozen or more comments on someone's dieting/weight loss blog and never get support back...maybe I should stop? Not sure. I know that I use a lot of time blogging/online, and I should cut back (especially with the gazillion things I need to accomplish this year, including finishing my novel and returning to my poetry writing and editing). I can only logically conclude that I should spend my time on those blogs that reciprocate, and I should drop the ones that do not.
But I am curious about your experiences with blogroll thinning/updating and how you choose which bloggers to continue to support, considering that we all have only 16 waking hours in the day to deal with dieting, exercising, working, grooming, cleaning, lovemaking, recreating, churching-going, and son--and that'sif we sleep the recommended 8 hours.
Anyway, hunger has not cropped up yet. ENERGY IS BACK, BABY! I read some Basho to keep the reflective, calm, zen groove going, exercised to Massive Attack, and now will go make myself purdy for hubby's homecoming. I plan to rock his world...in a very zen-like-but-energetic manner, of course. (hee) Then dinner to JELLYFISH PRINCESS! Yes!!!
Be happy, be well, be good, and have fun this weekend--only not food fun, other kinda fun. Well, okay, have food fun if it's within your caloric limits. Later....
12 comments:
You know, it's possible that 1200 calories just isn't for you at the moment. It could be something simple like that fact that you've had a lot of good weigh ins and now you're seeing a smaller number, but at the weight and activity level you are at I personally wouldn't go that low. You hit a good stride with 1600 where you were losing and feeling good, and I don't know if bringing it down more is going to be benefical. You've been in such a good place in your head recently, don't let sticking to 1200 mess with your progress.
Sleep all day... I just did!
It comes - it goes....
the body does it's thing and we do ours.
Just keep doing right and the numbers
take care of themselves!
You Rock Tha House!
Princess, I'm sorry about your pain and walking issues. Have you ever had your back checked out? I know that disc problems in the back can cause weakness and numbness in the legs. I have a bulging disc and foraminal stenosis but the pain was in my hip and leg and that leg was weaker than the other. Some core strengthening physical therapy helped me a lot.
Hey, Y'all!!!
Z, I'm in a challenge to do 1200 through May 1. I don't believe in judging the results based on one week...or ever two. BUT...if after three weeks or a month of eating at this level and exercising this hard means puny results, I'll take that to mean this is NOT for me. It's all about results for me, and I'll not hesitate to return to 1400 or 1700 if that's what it takes. I can only take so much lack of progress these days. :)
Anne, hey--thanks. I wanna always rock the house. I will persist and believe the results to come.
Karen, I never suffer from backaches. Thankfully. Occasionally a bit of bursitis in y L shoulder (daddy had it there, too, hmm). BUT...the exercises were tough, so I'm feeling SORE MUSCLES. As far as a back thing affecting legs..for sure. My SIL has sciatica. But since I never had pain anywhere in the region from back to thighs, and it's just from the knee down, taht's why I figure it's my knee injury. Hm. I could be wrong. Worth asking the ortho..when I get to see him/her.
Thanks for dropping in!
A Yeti reference, I love it! :)
Okay on to more serious stuff…it really is crazy how you can go from high-energy to incredibly low-energy on a day to day basis. It drives me crazy. I’ll go from cleaning for 8 hours on one day to not even being able to blog the next day. It’s sincerely frustrating! So I feel you on that one :(
I think you have a good idea about putting off going to the doctor until you get to under 200. Normally, I would never advise putting off a dr. visit but speaking from experience, if you do have to have surgery, you WILL want to be at the lowest weight possible. I just had another surgery in August for a hip I fractured while in the Army and I gained a good 20 lbs stuffing my face with comfort food during the recovery time (I went into the surgery at 210) and let me tell you, I KNOW it had an impact on my recovery.
As far as thinning out your blogs go, I have only had my blog for a few months so I haven’t done any thinning but I do understand how you might feel a bit dejected by not getting the blog love in return. However, if the person hasn’t blogged at all, i.e. they aren’t just ignoring you, they have retreated from blogging altogether, perhaps you could shoot them an email to make sure everything is going okay. I think weight-loss bloggers have a tendency to drop off the face of the earth under the insurmountable pressure of the holidays so maybe they could use a good kick in the rear from a friend ;)
I just recently thinned some blogs. My criteria is that someone has to have stopped blogging for over a year AND I don't remember them. Another criteria is if they are not serious about losing weight and blather on about eating McDonald's or crap food non-stop I remove them. I'll give you support all you want if you are really trying and failing, but to just up and quit trying then I just can't see following that.
As for the hunger, maybe you need to up your protein? It keeps you fuller longer. I know your test said you need higher carbs but if you are that hungry then perhaps you can eat 1200 calories and increase the amount of protein. I feel hunger between meals, but never anything that isn't a basic pang.
My protein has been pretty good, but today, for my snack, I got one of the WonderSlim 100 calorie chili products--it's low fat and has 15 grams of protein, so I thought that would curtail hunger so I won't feel excessively hungry when hunger tends to hit most: evening/late evening/early morning.
I have been following the plan almost to a T (the fudges tend to be adding veggies to eggs, a bit of parmesan in soup, and I log it.) And the plan pretty much is a moderately high carb, low fat, moderate protein sort of plan. I know not everyone is doing it according to the packet, but if you do (well, I guess depending which choices you prefer), it seems to get up into the mid hundreds in carbs, about 20 in fat grams, and the protein can vary (so far for me) from the 60s to the almost 90 range. Let's see what the lower carb protein snack does. :D
I so understand the scale disappointment with the scale. I did the same thing a couple of days ago. All I can say, and what others told me, is don't worry or stress. It will come. With a good calorie deficit every day your body will shed the pounds. It's science or something. :)
Sorry about the pain! Yikes. And I'm with ya on the soreness.
Concerning the numbness, maybe you should check if blood vessels or nerves get pinched if you walk faster?
I have quite a plate of blogs I read, and I usually throw them out if
a) I find myself skipping the posts more often than reading them or
b) they haven't updated in more than a month or
c) I find myself irritated/annoyed/not well after reading there.
Of course there are exceptions, but not many...
Honey, I'm glad you are talking about the scale disappointment, we both know what a fierce trigger it can be. Right now, at 1200 calories, I am, throughout the week, intentionally telling myself that I will probably be loosing less than a pound a week. I am intentionally lowering my expectations as a trigger prevention measure.
The weight is fickle, hell, I had one week where I ate 800 calories a day (I know I've told you this before) and the numbers didn't budge and then over Christmas where I exercised 4 to 5 hours a day, had 1200 calories a day and lost less than a pound. The thing is, that the downward whooshs come without rhyme or reason but when one comes along, it's so niiiice. So get ready and stay steady.
As for the hunger, I was thinking yesterday about how grateful I was that I intentionally took on hunger when I first started addressing my eating. Cut down to 500 calories a day and I felt me some hunger, I did. And I learned to embrace it and work my shoulders down from my ears and feel the grace at work and the power of owning my choices. Hunger is a chemical process in the body that can be triggered at the thought of food, it's whimsical and not indicative of much truth really. My son was born with no natural hunger signals at all. None. He does not know when he is hungry and as an infant he did not cry to eat and this is more common among infants than you might think. So, my son was conditioned to eat. When I studied this, I came to find adults who had no sense of hunger either, the neurological/gut connections simply were not there and some cannot tell the difference between feeling cold, hungry or needing to pee. (and for me, I know that being thirsty can set off hunger signals.)
I say all that to say that this is just wiring and our minds may interpret many signals incorrectly. I find these ideas helpful when I feel hungry and I'm puzzled as to why. It may just be a mystery. That's not to say that the foods don't affect hunger because of course they do and I feel much less hunger eating protein heavy but I always keep in mind the idea that hunger is as fickle as the scale... ;-)
As far as stopping support, I've recently thought about this as well. Frankly, I comment on a few blogs and have no expectation that they will ever read mine or support me, I am, after all, rather intense and prone to over writing and writing oddly and I think I probably scare people off, so I don't expect them to support my crazed self, lol, however, if I think there could be commonality and I offer support and receive none, then, meh, I usually stop the comments after a while if I have an unmet expectation. I think that what Diandra said is excellent, those are usually my reasons too. I also have blogs that I read for the "what not to do" reminder and I don't ever comment on them.
Ohhhhhhhhh, back to writing, how exciting!!!!! You go for it, go for your dreams and keep us posted please.
(see, look what happens when I don't blog for a while, I hijack someone else's blog, snarf.)
Ohhh, and look below, I rogue linked to you, I'm BAAAACK. heh.
When smart people hijack my blogs, I love it. Feel free to do so. :D
Thanks, everybody. The scale is EVEN WORSE today, and I moped for 10 minutes, then got back in gear and on we go....
I dropped out of Phase 4 for the lack of wiggle room. Hopefully you have more success than I was (I'd been doing 1200 since November and just hit a plateau).
On the blogroll- I only have so much time to spend on the computer between family and work, and exercise is a priority. I have to draw the line somewhere, so I prioritize. The bloggers that support me, I try to stop by and leave them a comment even if it was just to let them know I was there. Others, if I read something I think I can add to or relate to or help with, etc I'll leave something. Otherwise- I comment if I have time, and lurk if I don't. Maybe set yourself a time limit and prioritize? That's what I'm going to start doing! More time working out, less time on my hiney, LOL!
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