Tuesday, November 29, 2011

I've Begun Planning The Challenge for 2012...Cause, Hey, Helps Me, too!

I do get comments from challengers from past and current challenges I've cohosted that these are helpful. Yeah, I find them so. Glad some of y'all do, too.

Today, as I had free time, what with not having hubby to smooch and all, I began plotting the guidelines/rules/whatever for the challenge I'd like to begin on January 1st. Since that's a holiday, most folks are off, and doing an update should be fine. But I'll likely leave the update open through the second for that initial post and linky, cause, well, holiday, right? Hopefully, no one will be hungover. Bad for the liver, body, diet.... 

I figure just like CDCC--14 weeks, a book(s) for issues, updates with weight/goals, a tangible measuring object. I'm writing the rules out.

It will require a bit more than the CDCC, so obviously, those of you who found updating for the CDCC onerous--didn't bother with your reading, didn't bother supporting folks, etc--you will want to skip it.

And, like before, if you quit any of the challenges I was in or cohosted, don't ask to join. I want folks aiming to stick it out--good, bad, or in-between.

I think sticking it out helps. Even if it gets rough, I think just hanging in makes you (and me) not go off plan as much or backslide as much or regain as much. I really believe it keeps you, some part of you, the brain, the heart, IN the fight. That's why I won't allow in folks who quit previous challenges. I want folks seriously trying to overcome issues and fat and habits. It's what we all gotta do to lose and keep it off. STICK WITH IT--even when our mojo goes to crap.

So far, we have 2/3 of the CDCC crew still hanging in there. One third went buh-bye. I'm impressed with the 2/3. Keep going!

Those of you who found Slimmer This Summer or CDCC helpful in any way to your progress, journey, goal-achievements...well, consider it if, after you see the guidelines/rules, you are up to it. I don't care if it's me and one or two other people. Or me and 20 people. Although, I will cap it at a certain number, if interest is high, like 25 or 30, maybe. Heck, I may consider that 12 motivated people who will really be supportive and involved and full of good thoughts for their comrades would be better. Worked for..you know who!  If you have a small crew of folks who are committed, you can change the world.

Maybe I'll pray for just a set of 12--well, eleven plus me--with a fire in their souls for getting healthier, gals who will help me and maybe I can help, too, in this tough quest... and that small crew will NOT QUIT and UTTERLY TRANSFORM...and this will be our Emerge Glorious By Easter Challenge. 

Or whatever less dorky name I come up with.

So, I figure Jan 1st through April 8 (Easter Sunday). Would be nice if we were to have goal Easter outfits. :)  I really think fitting into something so pretty and fresh in a fitter, fresher body for one of the holiest days of the year (for us Christians, anyhow)...an outfit you DID NOT fit into makes you feel victorious. Overcomers!

I'm fine with those who want to lose lots (but realistic lots, not crazy pie in the sky TBL lots), and those who want to lose little, and those who don't want to lose on the scale, but want to maintain and just buff up and get over eating or sedentary issues--hey, even normalish weight folks can be weird about food and exercise.

So, that's my plan. Maybe no one wants in and it doesn't happen. I'm still gonna see January 1, 2012 way slimmer than January 1, 2011. I'm still gonna set goals and see how much farther I can go by Easter Sunday. If I do it alone, I will.

But I like doing it with fellow fatfighters who are willing to be open, honest, vulnerable, supportive, and accountable! It's supposed to be the Christian way...to be real, to fight the good fight, to never give up, and to help others not give up on their journey, too.

Happy Tuesday, peops. Hope some of you will be in it with me. (And yeah, I'll need a co-pilot again, cause it's always good to have someone cover things if "life happens".)

Now, what should I call this thing...what...what....?

Nite...be well...

Monday, November 28, 2011

The Skinny Jeans in October at 179.6; The Skinny Jeans in November at 179.8....Do You See What I See?

Remember the CDCC dress comparison? How it didn't even go over my upper thighs/butt in early October, but went on completely a week ago?

Okay, at that time I also took pics of a pair of newly purchased (on sale, TJ Maxx) skinny jeans. They fit (or rather did NOT fit) like this, even with a compression effect from that tight nike top:

Well, stagnant scale and all, I hit the jeans for a retry. (The tags are on the other side cause I am using a mirror. Hubby wasn't around to do me the favor this time.)

And I got this (excuse the unmade bed):

Dat's right. They went over the thighs, hips and zippered and buttoned up. Yep. Just like the dress. SAME WEIGHT. Different body.

Granted, they are tight as the dickens and I get some serious loose skin muffin-topping going on...and I wouldn't wear them out yet..or even try to sit just now...but they go up,  ZIP, and BUTTON. FREAKING HEY DOODLE DOODLE and who's your momma????

Well, nice. I needed that.

So, remember: If you're exercising, eating right, and drinking your fluids, but the scale is meh, try on your "outfit that doesn't fit". Try on your CDCC dress. Go to the store and try a smaller size, if one doesn't reside in your closet. Your composition may still be altered. Ask Karen--who has gained 10 lbs, but fits in the clothes that fit at her previous, smaller weight. She probably gained a lot of muscle from her recent exercising, even with eating a bit more.

Shifts can happen. If you've been hitting the gym and the walking/hiking trails and you haven't tested it out, test it out. TRY ON THAT THING THAT DIDN'T FIT A MONTH OR TWO AGO.

It might be a nice surprise.

Take a pic. Show us.

Nitey nite.

CDCC Update #11: Still Undecided, Still Kinda Stuck, And When's The Workbook Coming Out?? ; )

Tanita-san: 179.8

Up a little over half a pound.

At one point, after that extra meal late evening stupidapalooza diner visit on Thursday-- after perfectly navigating Thanksgiving proper with the fam--I was at 182.0.

I had allowed myself up to 184 in the refeeding program. But...honestly....

....yeah...I freaked a little bit when I saw 182.

Seriously, I gain at 1700. Daily caloric calculators and reality don't jive when you're metabo is effed up. BUT... I really gain at over 2000 (which was Thursday's final count, around 2200).

I wanted to be patient and let this system heal, but I keep telling myself "Um, I'm gonna go back to my normal 1400 plan." Then I tell myself, "But you got stuck eating low cal." Then: "But I'll get obese again refeeding at 1600, 1700."

I kept wavering back and forth. This is the story of my month.

RIGHT now, this instant, I want to go back to 1400/2 meals. In an hour I'll think: Stay with the high protein metabolism healing refeed.

Back and forth. I want to heal. I don't want to gain. I want to heal. I don't want to gain.

I already know what will happen if I go to 1200 again. I'll lose a bit, then stagnate as I do more metabo damage. I know it.

So, do I alternate 1200 days with 1600 days?

Where is that damn workbook???

Well, mini-freak aside when I saw 182--it was just a 10 second panic and then I calmed down and went about my day--I kept hoping I'd be miracle-healing girl, whose body would respond in weeks, not months or years....I thought I'd beat the odds, and rather than be patient like others have had to and let the body do its thing in due time, I'd shine.

I'm so ordinary. HAHAHAHA! No miracle girl. I didn't lose fast, like others. I don't heal fast. hah. My capacity for hope is huge, though. :D

I guess I'm impatient when I skim closer and closer to that line that demarcates obese from not-obese.

While my body has changed--the pics with the dress prove that--the scale is becoming a land of stagnant expectation.

I fear regain. I fear further metabo damage. I fear stagnancy somewhat less than both those options, and perhaps that's why I'm here.


Well, I am hoping the workbook and online group may give me insights on how to do this better--get leaner without compromising my system or the scale....I just am failing at it now. Impatience is not a virtue, but I want to see progress on the OTHER fronts, not just the dress going up the hips and on the bod. I want to see the 160s and I want to see my torso fat evaporating.

It's a weird thing to experiment on oneself. I did it before, finding a way to eat to help me lose.

Truth is, we become creatures of habit when habits worked well in one arena. I'm really happy to be at this weight. CRAZY HAPPY, which is why my freaks are short-lived, I guess. I'm still in Happyland.

And I want to say, "Just do it the old way."

But when I tried to do it the old way (high carb, low fat) dieting, it didnt' work for me. I did better against the rules/DNA. I did better with higher protein, lower carb, higher fat. So, my brain says, experiment again.Be that guinea pig.  You've done things ONE way, have consequences, so shift gears to do things another way to repair and make way for more progress.

But...er...I want to see loss. I want to see scale progress, too, dammit.

Do I have the faith to continue the metabo program?

Er....I don't think so.

Well, as you can see, I'm really of a split mind. And I have no easy answer today, either.

This has all been a learning journey. It continues to be. It can be energizing and it can be frustrating.

I press on and try to find good footing again. What am I gonna do?

Hell I know. I'm still of two minds. One body, two minds. We'll figure it out somehow. And try not to freak in any but a small way.

I did want to address a couple of things from the comments by Caron and Angela:

Caron: Easy peasy for the cranberries. I used fresh organic berries, followed Melting Mama's basic sugar free recipe that she had on her blog last week, and used Truvia instead of sucralose (my usual sweetener). Everyone raved about it. I loved it. No guilt sauce. Berries, Truvia, water, cook up, pop-pop, 15 minutes or so, cool. Done.

Angela: Yeah, I know. I used to binge on utter crap. Now, I when I overeat or break plan, it's for more fruit or more protein or...as you saw, a spinach omelette and some cut melon. It's a whole different mindset--from binge on fast food to eat more spinach, eggs, fruit, etc. hahahah. It's nutritive. It was too much for my body (I simply can't handle a lot of calories, not even for my size, which is hardly waifish). But it's far better than hitting the sugar, processed, junk, gluten....for sure.

Keep at it, people. Keep fighting and believing. I do. As confused and ridiculous as I may come across right now, it's all part of the journey....we keep at it. NEVER QUIT.

Even if we have to change the ticker and lose a couple pounds on it. Ah, darn. I'll get that 121 lbs lost number back showing on the ticker again. (Angela, that clearer?)

Be well...

Now, to link up and see about breakfast.

Friday, November 25, 2011

When Smart Gals Do Dumb*ss Stuff...ah, well...But I Looked Curly Good!

I got through Thanksgiving and the games/fun afterwards on plan. I took my sugar-free baked apples, sugar-free (and amazing) cranberry sauce (organic, made from fresh berries, and it was the BEST I had in my life, no lie). I had oodles of veggies and good pile of white meat. Took lots of green tea to guzzle. Wore a shaper that was snug to keep me NOT super-filling up. :D

Done good!

And then on the drive home, hubby was hungry, we ended up at a diner at 10pm, and I had a spinach omelette and a fruit cup and decaf.


Yeah, well. There you go. I also do stupid-ass diet things.

How does one get through the feast just fine and then ..."Oh, let me eat more!"

A reminder that strategy, for me, must be in place 24/7, not just at those times deemed "danger periods."

Well, we had fun. Unbelievably fine day--cool, low humidity, sunny, breezy.

I hope you had fun, too, and I hope you didn't do some late night noshing like me.

Oh, and me (curls are back) and hubby all spiffied up for the feast-we had a purple/pink/black theme:

Thankful Princess and Prince

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Thanksgiving: We'll Be Grateful Fatfighters on Friday if we have a Strategy TODAY for Thursday! Warrior Garb...ON!

Okay, still working on the protein/refeeding and it gets frustrating some days, but energy is high, mood is high, and I wake up wanting to dance. This..not so bad. :D

Tomorrow is one of those minefields for dieters. It just is. Last year, I did great and lost weight through the holidays, thanks to Allan's DDDY Challenge keeping me focused.

This year, it's up to me to keep me focused, and it's up to me to have my strategy in place.

As I am bringing a couple dishes, I choose to make stuff I can eat. Natch. My organic coop has green beans, yams, celery, carrots, raspberries, seckel pears, pumpkin squash, at least one herb (sage, thyme, etc), mushrooms, greens, cranberries,  and granny smith apples, so making one cooked veggie and one crudite side along with some baked apples (walnut butter, cinnamon, bit of real butter) gives me some totally safe side and dessert options. (I'm keeping those wonderful seckels for myself, nom nom.)  I will make no-sugar cranberry sauce...fresh and organic and good for me. Not the crap in cans that's processed to death and full of pancreas-destroying, glucose-spiking nonsense.

Baking apples is easy, tastes like apple pie without all the crap in apple pie. :D Win!

Side veggies fill you up. Go easy on the butter, go strong on the herbs. WIN!

If the salad veggies are great, make a beautiful salad and add all sorts of colorful things in it to make it pop. I may make a spinach, walnut, cranberry one. :D WIN!

Skip the bread. It's so ordinary. Unless it's a super-special, grandma-baked, never eaten any other time of the year, why use up those calories on useless, gluten-laden stuff? (And if you have gluten sensitivies, for Heaven's sake, be sane. Stop being a child and  grow the damn up about food and stay away from the damn stuff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You will hurt yourself and lose years with your family, cause it will kill you.  STOP IT!)

Eat at least one indulgent food in a small portion so you don't feel deprived-(whatever is your fave, be it the pumpkin pie or sweet tater casserole or mashed taters or green bean casserole) and fill up on turkey meat (hey, the breast is so low cal you can just pig out on THAT, sans the cranberry sauce which tends to be loaded with sugar.

I plan to fully enjoy white meat turkey, veggie sides, salad, and my apple bake. I don't plan to have bread. I will indulge in my fave traditional items in small amounts (like last year, where I had no more than 1/3 cup of each): sweet potato casserole, which my sister has been making sugar free, but with some lovely almond extract or Amaretto. It's worth every bite. And I plan to wear snug pants. I have them. They are really snug and if I try to overeat, they will hurt. Bought them snug just for this purpose.

Wear a girdle, if you must, to keep things TIGHT. :)

WHAT IS YOUR STRATEGY? Have one. Doesn't matter what you plan up, but have plans.

And calm down and choose BEFOREHAND. When faced with the array of temptations, that's when your armor will rust and fall apart if you didn't plan ahead.

I suggest for myself (and you):

Fill up on fluids and have a good breakfast to take the edge off. Have protein, veggies and fluids EARLY...to keep you from being famished while you cook/prep/greet/socialize.

At the dinner: drink water (2 cups) before eating. Sit and choose wisely. Remember that you can enjoy a couple bites of the indulgent stuff, savor it, but think of the consequences is you stuff up. You'll hate yourself Friday. NOT WORTH IT!

Dr. Berkeley, author of REFUSE TO REGAIN, whose practice helps people get and keep weight off, wrote a terrific article a couple years back to help folks cope with the holiday barrage. READ IT.  It will help you with your planning.

Here are her strategy recommendations:

1. The Old Scan and Plan: Don’t ever get caught in a corner. You should know what’s coming and have a plan to counterpunch. Imagine each holiday situation in as much detail as you can way before it ever happens. Plot a course through the food challenges. When the day comes, mentally check off each situation as you enact your plan. It’s your private game.
2. The Switcheroo: Everyone’s there for the food. Except you! Switch your reason for being at the dinner, family gathering, office party. You’re there to gather information by finding out at least one thing you never knew about five people in the room. You’re there to advance your career by finding someone at the party who can give you a lead. You’re there to see how many people you can get to ask you about your weight loss and how you did it. You’re there to change someone’s life by inspiring them to eat healther, be more like you. Set a goal. Keep track.
3. The Stare Down: For advanced maintainers only! For the true gladiator, there’s nothing more enjoyable than challenging yourself to a direct face-off with the food that used to control you. If you’ve passed the invisible barrier that separates maintenance junior (early maintainer) from SLIM (senior level maintainer), you might enjoy this trick, which is the equivalent of facing down a lion with nothing more than your expression. Go to the table, look at everything, and laugh. A good, loud, internal “HAH!” and a head toss help a lot.
4. The Dress for Success: Wear your best looking and most form fitting clothes. Let them talk to you as you negotiate that dangerous territory. The pressure of snug clothing will remind you of what your body has achieved and prevent you from filling up.
5. The Bring Your Own: A good trick for buffets, pot lucks and other challenges too. Bring a safe dish and make it something you can really load up on if there is little else that fits your rules. Generally, these clean, simple dishes go fast. After all, everyone recognizes healthy food…even if they don’t want to admit it.

As Allan used to tell us, focus on the people.

Focus on the joys of the holiday. Focus on games, conversation, dancing. Focus on the big games or parades. Focus on good memories of times past. Focus on gratitude and enlarging your health so you can have many more holidays to come with those you love and who love you.

It's not about falling face first into a pile of food. It's about the GRATITUDE for the food that keeps us a live, for the family and for the friends who share the food with us, and for the freedom to work and pray and rest and eat in peace--for the life we have. IT"S NOT ABOUT PIGGING OUT AND BEING OUT OF CONTROL.

Make it HOLY--meaning leave the gluttony (a sin) out of it.  Make it WHOLLY good, by feeling satisfied and having fun and remember to be thankful for the blessings in your life.

I have many blessings. I want to be in control with food and out of control with love. If you must choose to overindulge, overindulge in joy.

What is your high-joy, low-gluttony strategy for tomorrow?

Happy Thanksgiving, all, ....be well....

Saturday, November 19, 2011

CDCC Update 10: Weight up...but look....Big Honking NSV with VISUAL PROOF that Sometimes The Scale Is An Ass (With Apologies to Dickens)

Tanita-san: 179.2

One pound up from yesterday. And I'm guessing the 1500 mg of sodium with din-din may be partly to blame, yes? But dang, those organic collards were amazing.

Still, I was surprised by that number. Why? I always feel my torso up before I get out of bed. A body check, as it were. And I felt...flatter. Smaller. Seriously....I expected a loss. I looked at myself naked in the mirror (my post body check ritual), and I looked "less than."

The scale said what?

So, I did a non-scale check. I got put on hot deep pinky red Principessa lipstick--it's 2 years old and still not rancid, go, you, Kevyn Aucoin!--for fortification, I put on my underwire plunge bra, then I got out my challenge dress that still didn't fit last month, which was the last time I tried it on.

My eyes were telling me my body was leaner.

The scale said I was pudgier.

Let's put it to the test.

FOR COMPARISON:  On October 8th, more than a month ago, I was virtually the same weight. I was 179.6 when I made this post with pics of me trying to fit into the dress.  It would not go up past my thighs.

So, today, at 179.2,  wearing no shapewear--which I so, so need with a snug dress like this, what with all the loose skin/pannus/side and back saggies-- just regular cotton undies (not tight, comfy that I like to wear at home), I unbagged the dress. Will I get it on this time?  Will it be an epic fail? Did my eyes deceive me? Is the scale right or are my hands and eyes right, and I'm different in some way....leaner at the same weight?

Well, I guess the header gave it away.

For the visual answer.....and forgive the dirty hair, haven't washed it since my blow-out last Thursday, cause I make those babies LAST.... and am due today for a nice deep conditioner treatment....Voila!

Same dress. Same weight. Different fit.

Yep. Visual proof.

Clearly, it's snug. But I can bend over and move in it. I figure about 7 to 10 less pounds of fat and it will look killer perfect. And with shapewear, natch.

What shapewear would YOU wear under this dress? I'm thinking a "wear your own bra compression slip" would be good, eh?

So, there it is. Same weight (nearly). Different body.

Exercise and protein. Makes a difference.

I had mentioned to Mr. Bailor (author of The Smarter Science of Slim) that I was concerned about the regain. He said, watch the body. The composition can change on the higher protein "smarter" diet, while the scale might not cooperate.

Might be true. We will continue to test this. :D

CDCC Update:

Calories: ranged between 1500 and 2000.
Exercise: 2 Pilates sessions, 3 20 to 30 minutes dancing sessions.
Fluids: fine.
Support: I posted many a long-winded comment. Snarf.
Mood: Fabulous.
Book(s): Yep. Still reading and learning.
Dress: Fits (snugly). Getting to the perfect fit by Xmas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I will be putting the CDCC linky up in a bit. Please, challengers, update before midnight EST Sunday. Do it on time. Please!

Okay, later.

Try on your CDCC outfit. See if you made progress. And..be well, everyone!

Friday, November 18, 2011

Still tinkering with the higher protein, calorie refeed....and some pics of Holiday lipstick and Numsy Breakfast...also don't drink LEAD with your CALCIUM, and a heads up for CDCC Challengers (read CDCC blog, please)

Tanita-san: 178.2

The tinkering goes on. I had hit 179.4 earlier in the week (almost two pounds higher than lowest number I'd seen on the scale in 21 years--177.6). So, going down from 2000-2200 to 1500 to 1700 is a good move for now.

Experimenting to see at the highest caloric level at which I can lose again, so I don't cut down any more than necessary. And I want to see if I can reset that setpoint and be able to eat MORE (not crazy more, just reasonably more) than my effed up numbers allow.

Healing is tough. Healing the metabolism is ubertough. We plunge ahead and move on and keep learning and tweaking and keeping the faith, right?

Anyway, splurged on a holiday lipstick, LANCOME's Absolute Rouge shade (from the Rouge L'Absolu line). I got it in the mail yesterday, so even though my face was unwashed, no makeup, etc, I swiped it on to test out:

Absolute Rouge by Lancome

I like it. Looks "cooler" in real life, but  I think the warmer/gold tones in my skin makes it reflect warmer. :) Super pricey. Super self-indulgent. But it makes me happy to have creamy holiday red on the lippies! (I'm such a brat.)


Plate: egg whites topped with sauteed broccoli slaw and mushrooms (cooked in ghee,with spices), shredded cheddar on top.
bowl: papaya with lime juice
glass: iced decaf green tea with lime juice
cup: fresh coffee....(had 2 cups)
Not shown: 2 glasses water before eating...

Between meals, I do up my whey protein shakes with flax (sometimes I use Aroy-D coconut milk and water, sometimes almond milk and water, sometimes just water).

And I prefer my calcium this way, and, one hopes, without lead. (If you take calcium supplements, get one that ain't toxic, K? But best if you eat well. Get it naturally. Wish I had access to primo, superduper raw milk.)

Hope everyone is doing fine.

If you're in the challenge, please read about the two prizes we'll be giving away at Challenge's finale.

Thanks, be well....

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Got Hashimoto's Thyroiditis? Get Rid of the Gluten!

Auto-immune wackiness runs in my family--AITD, Lupus, Alopecia Universalis, autoimmune aplastic anemia, and the gamut of allergies/sensitivities....

So, if you have this stuff, too, I feel  your pain!

Anyway, READ THIS if you have AITD/Hashimoto's and you're still eating those recommended 'healthy whole grains' with gluten. Seriously, look into it. Read WHEAT BELLY by Dr. Davis, while you're at it, too.

And if you already know you're sensitive (Debbi, Deb Willbefree, etc), put down the dang gluten!!!!! Stop that!!!  Ditch it!!!! Don't look back!!!! :)

Hashimoto’s often manifests as a “polyendocrine autoimmune pattern”. This means that in addition to having antibodies to thyroid tissue, it’s not uncommon for Hashimoto’s patients to have antibodies to other tissues or enzymes as well. The most common are transglutaminase (Celiac disease), the cerebellum (neurological disorders), intrinsic factor (pernicious anemia), glutamic acid decarboxylase (anxiety/panic attacks and late onset type 1 diabetes).

It's not your thyroid. It's your immune system whacking your thyroid (and, maybe, other tissues). Take care of yourself from the gut in.

And be well...

Sunday, November 13, 2011

CDCC Update #9: Refeeding to follow the SSofS Plan is Fricken TERRIFYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But....I will work this out and make this work! Plus a look back at November 2010 vs November 2011 (for perspective) ...and the challenge particulars. And some pics at 178.0!!

Tanita-san: 178.0

That's minus 0.2 lbs from last week's official weigh in.

Looking back at other Novembers close to this since I began my blogging to lose weight (after a high of 299 in June of 2004, I didn't start blogging until 2007 at 279 lbs, I'd lost 20 lbs  in those 3 years):

Nov 15, 2007: 274.8 (-24.2 from high weight)
Nov 09, 2008: 271.8 (down 27.2) (Can see I was struggling, right?)
Nov 14, 2009: 268.6 (down 30.4)
Nov 17, 2010: 245.2 (down 53.8, and after new blog begun in 9/2010)
Nov 13, 2011: 178.0 (down 121 pounds....and yes, changed a lot!)

I kept experimenting all those years. Sometimes just gave up and binged again. Tried something new. Kept going. I never totally gave up, even when I took hiatuses in frustration. I kept going back to try something. My old blog is still here, at http://onceuponadiet.blogspot.com. It catalogs my steps back and forward. My beginning with Pilates in June of 2008 (a turning point in how damn serious I was getting about healing.)

You can click on PROGRESS PICS on tabs section under the blog header to see how I looked at those approximate weights/times.

What does 178.0, 121 lbs lost, look like on me today?

Here ya go, me, after I was done dancing with the hubby, no makeup, before breakfast,  wearing my NETRITION tank, size M (men's, I'm guessing)....the living proof:
Got a blow-out Thursday and I woke up looking
like this! Didn't even brush it out. Nice!

Yep. My belly is still my fatty spot,
but dang, my legs are hot! Not so bad for
a chronically ill, 2 decades plus
obese/morbidly obese,
almost 52 year old dame.

Oops..tank is too loose and bra is showing!

That 178.0 is a bit higher than the lowest number I saw on the scale a couple days ago (177.6).

This is not surprising, btw. I've been following the plan in THE SMARTER SCIENCE OF SLIM (to heal my whack metabolism and restore normal fat-burning) for several days. It's a bit different from my regular eating pattern.

Let me recap:

Previous eating patterns in 2011:

~~Hardcore Phase: 2 meals or 2 meals and a protein/fat-rich snack for a total of no more than 1200.
~~Then Lesser Hardcore: 2 meals or 2 meals Plus Snack for no more than 1400
~~Then same as above but no more than 1500. Which has been my recent pattern (the last month or so)

But this past week, without a lot of exercise (the healing ankle), I added the whey/flax combo 2 to 3 x a day. That's anywhere from 600 to 900 extra calories just from the added protein/flax/almond milk between meals. I was doing 2000 2200 cals a day for the last 3 days. 1800 the day before that.

That's a boatload of calories. I had to force myself to do it, cause I had no appetite. I really could have gone all day without eating until supper. No appetite, zip. BUT...not eating would defeat the purpose of this phase. It's more like REFEEDING to stimulate the system.

I find this utterly terrifying, and I'm going on faith here. I may need to backtrack, reassess, and see how I can refine it to be less terrifying. Sort of go through in increments to the total recommendation in the book. When one is used to eating lower cal and losing, to eat a lot more calories becomes an anxiety-producing, scary enterprise.

I'm pooping my pants.

I kid you not. I'm wary. But I move on faith, believing my system CAN heal.

So, I've gained. And I will be looking at the book again, my eating, find a way to get the protein/veggies in in the recommended intervals with only a lesser rise in calories.

I know the book says DO NOT WORRY ABOUT CALORIES...but the fact is, that I will feel better progressing more slowly. I just have to look at the info and personalize it. I know I was maintaining at about 1600, so maybe start the program at 1500 and work it up slowly. I will have to figure that out, and it's gonna be tricky. I will need to find a different whey protein (I am using PaleoMeal and the Swanson's, because they are from healthy, grass-fed cows with minimal processing.) I ordered some Jay Robb's to see how that works for me--no weird sweeteners, grass fed cows, no hormones. It's expensive, but using food as medicine tends to be expensive at first. Economizing can come when I get the system down.

My actual meals are the same as always--protein and veggies at core, fruit for dessert, some nuts, sometimes yogurt for a snack or mini-meal, minimal starches. I bought some Beef gelatin to use for snack/protein/supplementation.

I'm already used to drinking a lot of water (which Bailor recommends strongly) and I've added the decaf green tea for metabolic enhancing purposes. Really like it iced with a splash of lime. I make several cups daily and refrigerate to drink ad libitum.

I feel great, btw. Wake up wanting to sing and dance. I pulled hubby off the couch after I woke up (he was watching soccer) and we started dancing to SEPTEMBER's new dance cd (thumbs way up). I was just bopping and laughing. Started bumping him and he goes, "Um, are you fertile???" hahahah. No, I just feel really good. Ankle is better.

I return to Pilates tomorrow (will test the leg there and see how I've progressed. Less numbness is nice.)

I intend to get back to walking, and I've begun some upper body eccentric exercise.

In all, just trying to heal. So, I'm willing to put up with some refeeding regain  SOME. (I've seen some metabolic healing bloggers refer to a period of regain before the body revs up and starts burning at higher caloric levels and weight loss resumes.) Some experts say healing of the metabo can take years. Oh, lawdy. I honestly don't know how much I will tolerate other than a few pounds. I won't tolerate above 184. That's my, "Screw it zone." Psychologically.

I guess it's guinea pig time for me. In the hopes of a greater, healthier, newer me. It's scary and it's exciting.

But other than the protein addition, I'm pretty much eating the clean way I've eaten for months and months. No gluten. Low starch. Moderate carbs. Lots of fresh (ideally organic) veggies. Good protein sources. Healthful fats daily. Some fruit. Lots of water. And a bit of a treat now and then (dark chocolate, fruit/nut bars).

Here's to going boldly where others may have gone before, intrepidly, but not me. And I go like the worrywart wuss I am. Yet with lots of faith and curiosity.

Challenge particulars:

Calories: 1500 early part of week, 1800, then around 2000 last couple days. Intentional. Despite low appetite. Really low appetite.

Fluids: great

Exercise: some, but still in healing phase. Dancing, some eccentric push-ups and shoulder presses. Stretching (Pilates and yoga-style). Balance exercises for knees/ankle.

Support: Yep. I've commented (and sometimes quite at length) on some (not all) challenge blogs. I hope I was able to be of help.

Books: Finished THE SMARTER SCIENCE OF SLIM, and am gonna reread it. Have read some of THE END OF OVEREATING again.

Mood: EXCELLENT. And I will not quit. Not ever. I will grow and learn and try and continue on this tough journey to health and self-discovery.

Goals for this week: To stay at or above 1500 cals while following the SSofS protocol (in my seque-ing modified way). Keeping an eye on scale. To up exercise (especially muscle-building, with walking for joint health). To dance when I want, cause it makes me happy! To keep the faith. To keep going. To be someone who encourages others on their journey. To....heal.

If you're in the CDCC and haven't updated yet. Please do so before end of today, EASTERN TIME, and go link up on the official challenge blog.

Later. Be well....

Friday, November 11, 2011

Heads-Up For Those Who Pre-Ordered (or Plan to) THE SMARTER SCIENCE OF SLIM!

As I plan to be a guinea pig for the plan (to see if I can fix my metabo some), and enjoyed the book, I liked the FB page.

Today, Bailor offered to give online access to folks who preorder through Amazon. That means you read it NOW, not in January. And online (right on your puter). Like I did. :D It'll look like this, only it will be the whole book

He put the message up on  his FB.

I am going to reread it and try to fully implement the plan beginning next week. I am incorporating some stuff already (whey, flax meal, more decaf green tea). The exercise for anything having to do with my lower joints has to wait a bit, as I want to consult with my trainer for safety reasons,  but I am doing the eccentric arm exercises. :)

Okay, may update again later...but now...I wanna dig my new cds from Japan. :D

(Oh, and if you go to Amazon, do me a favor and click HELPFUL in my review --I'm "Mir" and a top 500 reviewer.I try to make my reviews long and helpful, and I appreciate the clicks. ) My review is currently the first one showing on the left, but amazon can change that around. THANKS.

To Veterans, Past & Present...Thank You. Because Freedom Earned and Kept Requires Courage and Sacrifices From So Many!

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Deeper into the 170s, and links to some "yes, diet affect metabolisms more than expected" stuff

Tanita-san: 177.8

I'm eating 1400 to 1500 cals. No exercise (resting ankle). I upped my protein (whey concentrate in PaleoMeal). Yesterday, I had 4 rashers of bacon. Wow. That was tasty. I ate a nice bowl of organic grapes.  Fruit is my candy. Those were my two special treats yesterday. Salty bacon and sweet grapes. Also had chicken (at two meals), assorted veggies (including broccoli, cabbage, snow peas). I had Greek yogurt. Walnuts. Blueberries. I had potato (very little, but was nice).

Since Beth asked, I added a couple links to the comments section yesterday. The book I'm reading also talks about studies on metabolic changes post-dieting, including how dieting eats up disporportionate amount of muscle IN THE OBESE (more so than the metabolically lean folks, who will burn fat efficiently when in caloric deficit). But the TBL article shows that even with immense exercise that burned calories and built muscle, they became metabolically slower. It's not a myth.

Here are the two links, but you can research this yourself to get the info. Or read that book I linked up to a few posts back. :)

TBL change metabolically (slow down more than expected despite all that exercise and nutritional advice)

Recent Australian Study on hormonal changes still present a year after dieting/weight loss

A quote from that NYT Article on that study:

Other hormones that stimulate hunger, in particular ghrelin, whose levels increased, and peptide YY, whose levels decreased, were also changed a year later in a way that made the subjects’ appetites stronger than at the start of the study.
The results show, once again, Dr. Leibel said, that losing weight “is not a neutral event,” and that it is no accident that more than 90 percent of people who lose a lot of weight gain it back. “You are putting your body into a circumstance it will resist,” he said. “You are, in a sense, more metabolically normal when you are at a higher body weight.”
A solution might be to restore hormones to normal levels by giving drugs after dieters lose weight. But it is also possible, said Dr. Jules Hirsch of Rockefeller University, that researchers just do not know enough about obesity to prescribe solutions.
So, when you see those who've been on a diet and lose weight and then go bonkers with hunger, this seems to be why. It's not that they're insane. It's that they're hormonally effed up.

Hence my change in eating plan. I want to minimize as much as possible the metabolic damage, I don't wanna go whack and regain, and I want to heal. I may be whistling in the dark, but I know that I am metabolically slower than average (likely for multiple reasons, dieting being just one). Worth a shift in action as I near the weight I want to be and don't want to see leave me behind in a hormonal insanity of eating/binge-ing.

BTW, having read how a lot of aerobic exercise can increase appetite, that's one reason I simply...don't. I walk for the benefits to my joints and to burn some calories, but I don't do hours and hours of the stuff. I need to spare my joints, sure, but I also don't want to get into more metabolic danger zone. I'll dance with joy, but I won't trudge on treadmills and ellipticals. I'll play, but I won't jog. I"ve never felt famished after a good brisk walk in the sunshine, smelling blossoms, hearing birds. I feel....relaxed. Centered.  I'll stop and chat sometimes with a newly met neighbor. It's social.

So, for me, it's a lot about mood and mental health, not just keeping my legs looking hot and burning calories. :D

I might look into eccentric weight training, though. That does seem to build muscle effectively and boost metabolism. :D

I want muscle and not to stress my joints and need surgery. Sigh. Aging sucks.

But, let's focus on what we can. Yes, the hormonal gods may be after us, but we find a way to fend them off and move on to the holy and high places.

Be positive. Eat soundly. Move healthfully.

Be well....

Monday, November 7, 2011

Figure out how many calories you need to maintain, lose, or gain...and are you effed up like me?

The Harris-Benedict Formula helps you here.

I went and did this, cause I've been pretty sedentary for 1.5 weeks to rest my sprained ankle. For my age/height/weight, these formulas say my maintenance level calories as a sedentary dame = 1794. (This is for a normal person, I assume.)

At goal weight it would be 1700 cals.

Now, that's sedentary. However, I found that when I was more active recently at a similar weight, 1700 was maintenance for me--and that's walking 4 to 5 days, 2 hour long trainer led Pilates sessions. Clearly, I am metabolically challenged. The calculator says 2300 cals would be maintenance. Um..right. Thank you effed up thyroid and post-morbid-obesity metabolic slowdown. Thanks oodles.

It is consistent with what I've read about being able to take in LESS after huge weight loss.

At 1400 calories, with minimal exercise at home, I still can lose a bit. I refuse to go back down to 1200 calories, as I want my metabolism to heal, and my reading on the matter is not cheering about those who stay at low cals long-term. I've intentionally increased my intake to 1400 to  (some days ) 1600, to let my body understand the famine is over. I'll take losing in tiny increments over more metabolic damage.

I know not everyone agrees on the caloric issues, but I've read enough to be convinced that I don't want to stay at the lower safe dieting range. I'd rather stay at the upper range and hope it stimulates things. (Fingers crossed.)

I wish I could eat 2300 and maintain. Hah. Then I could lose weight at 1800 calories. One pound a week eating that. Nice, huh?

It also says that at goal weight (160) at my previous level of moderate activity (consistently exercising), I would maintain 160 lbs with roughly 2200 calories.



Excuse me while I laugh so hard my teeth rattle.

Yeah. Dream on. Perhaps metabolic healing will occur with continued sound eating and time. Perhaps. But I know for a fact that's not what I see happening even with, say, TBL folks. Previous female losers (and younger than me, at that), had to exercise like mad and stick to about 1400-1500 calories or fewer to maintain those losses. Yes, that calculator isn't taking into account the metabolically screwed.

More than 2000 cals at moderate exercise activity at goal weight. Hmmm. It's hard to envision such a thing. That's not how this body rolls. Not even when I was morbidly obese. I was always below those calculations for burn-off.

Anyway, do the calculations. See where you fall.

Let me know what numbers you get for your current and goal maintenance level. I'm curious if it jives with your nutrition tracking. If you've lost oodles of weight, are you now showing the slowed metabolism, too?

Happy Monday. Enjoy this new week. We got a gorgeous day in Miami and I was thanking God for it. So nice here.....

Be well...

Saturday, November 5, 2011

CDCC Update #8: One Pound Down in a Nearly No Exercise Week...

Tanita-san: 178.2

Well, that's a pound from the last update. I'm sure had I been able to exercise, it would have been more. Aside from a bit of stretching and some balance work for my knee, I rested. My ankle and knee are very troublesome right now, and my intuition said, let it be.

It's hard not exercising. I want to go walk. I want to get up and dance. I want to move. But sometimes, healing says, let it be. Be still.

I did make the conscious effort to burn more calories by keeping up movement when sitting. I'd set the timer and ever 45 minutes, I'd start doing something that took abdominal or upper body work. I also would march in place a bit in front of the tv or while doing dishes. Anything to just burn a bit more since I wasn't doing my walks or Pilates this week.

So, I'm being still...sorta. ; )

Calories have been 1400 to 1500, varying.
Fluids: fine
Mood: good
Rest: good
Support: I've posted on several CDCC blogs.
Book: Been reading THE SMARTER SCIENCE OF SLIM, taking notes on researchers and studies as I go, so it's slow going.

I will say that being further down into the 170s is very cheering.

I did lose some tatas. Went and bought 38DDDs, and they fit. Oh, well. :P

To the Challengers: The link is up. Don't wait until the very last minute. Go update.

Be good to yourself with wholesome food, adequate rest, healthful movement, positive thoughts, hopeful prayers, and loving support. Don't give up. Do good things for your body, mind, and spirit, and good results will eventually, in time, come. I believe this, so I am merciful and kind to my body, and keep the hope that continued positive changes will be achieved. Even if very slowly. As long as it's good, it's good. :D

Believe in yourself. Be good to yourself.

Persist...and be well.

Happy weekend, folks.

Friday, November 4, 2011

What I'm Reading Now...

What I'm reading now. 

And if you're on a low-calorie reducing diet, or have a history of yo-yo dieting, or get really hungry and have a hard time staying on a low-cal diet, or find it hard to lose even though you've cut back calories, or have lost and have started regaining, or have lost a lot and have stalled and can't seem to budge, or if you're skeptical of set-point theory, or you've given up on losing weight cause you've failed so much, or if you are exercising like mad and not seeing commensurate fat loss....might wanna take a look.

I'm nowhere near finishing, but so far, it's interesting. I keep an open mind. And I appreciate the many quotes from actual researchers.

I believe in continuing to learn, read, be critical, in order to find  what works BEST for lifelong weight loss. I accept that I will always be learning, because science is always learning, and this journey will need refinement, always. And attention, always.

Be well today..and ALWAYS. :D

(Oh, and scale the same. Now, I'm stuck at 178.4. hahahahahahha That's okay. As long as the stuck points are moving downward in increments....I'll get there.)

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Rain Kiboshed the Walk Yesterday, Coop Share Today Has My Fave Pears and good stuff, and may need to see an ortho about left leg, darn...also, PRAY FOR APRIL!

Tanita-san: 178.4, unchanged

I got my sneaks on and went to walk yesterday, and...RAIN again. Rained all evening , just about.

But I may need more rest time. My left leg has not been right since I sprained my ankle. I'm getting a bit of foot drop and numbness. An ortho may be in my future if rest doesn't cure this. Okay, it scares me a little. My knee has been bad for so long, that more problems in that leg I don't need.

On the happy side, here's my list for today's organic co-op share:

  • Tiny Sugar Seckel Pears
  • Baby Crimson Apples
  • Bananas
  • Mini Sweet Watermelon
  • Baby Peeled Carrots
  • English Cucumber
  • Grape Tomatoes
  • Romaine Lettuce
  • Baby Broccoli
  • Seasonal Cooking Greens
  • Turnips
  • Green Cabbage
  • Yellow Onions
  • Small Delicata Squash

I have no idea what to do with turnips. I will need to look up a squash recipe. But dang, I have so looked forward to those tiny, sweet pears (I think I posted about them last year on this blog--adore em).  I also have an added fruit portion that will have:

  • Honeycrisp Apples
  • Red Seedless Grapes
  • Local Florida Navel Oranges
So, good stuff for my fridge and fruit bowls. :)

I'd like to make a prayer request for our Miss April of 30 by 30 blog. She has a criminal stalker. It's causing upheaval--at home and at work. Please pray for justice to be done and tranquility to return and and safety to be upon her 24/7. Thanks.

Be well today. I have to go write cause I totally spazzed yesterday. Not one word. Yes...getting a rusty brain in motion is tough...


Tuesday, November 1, 2011

New Month, New Goals, New Minimally Lower Number...Achy Joints and a Rusty Writer's Brain, but hey, I'm working on the latter starting today!

Tanita-san: 178.4

Sunny day. Nice after the rain, rain, storms, tornado warnings, tornadoes, flood warnings, flooding, rain, mess we've been having.

I can go walk today, at last!

The left leg is still weird since I twisted my ankle in the fall. Some numbness and aching. My knees are, as often happens, a little achey and noisy.

But walk I will.

Breakfast was chicken and some veggie sushi. (Still having those little cravings) Got lots of rest. Fluids are on track.


It's both exciting and a little saddening.

Exciting as all new beginnings can be...but especially since after a many years hiatus, well, um, like 4 years, after the interest of some editors spooked me off. (Yes, fear of failure and success intertwined in my neurotic self.)

So.... I'm gonna start writing again. Writing creatively, not bloggily. FICTION!

I'm rusty--oh, so rusty-- and I think the NaNoWriMo challenge is what I need to lubricate the mind and get back into creator mode. I have no idea what I will start writing today. You're not suppose to take up a previously begun novel...so I must start FRESH. I'll just hit the keys and see what erupts, then take time during the coming weeks to outline and plot with whatever my juicy brain spills out.

Saddening because another year is almost over. And endings can be sort of sad, eh?

I want to end strong: Leaner, more creative, upbeat, full of dreams, more organized, less self-critical, more self-actualized, closer to the multitude of goals that seemed to elude me for so much of my adult life due to my flaws or self-sabotage or chronic illness or fear, fear, fear. The neuroses are gonna have to cave to my desire to conquer and achieve. Out of my way, Negative Self.

And, well, cuter. Can I be cuter by year's end, too? :D I loved the double-takes and compliments I got out and about yesterday. Heck, I even thought I looked smoking in my window reflection. I don't know what was going on, but I looked really good yesterday and the world noticed. hahahah.

If you see me post less frequently, it's the novel challenge.

If you see me post more often, it's also probably the novel challenge, getting me all wordy. hahahah.

Okay, so, Princess Crappy Knees is off to walk and use the walk time to try and begin to nurture some ideas for the writing later tonight. My first fiction writing in a long, long time. Wish me well, k?

And I wish you wonderful things, too!