Face the Truth Friday: The Last Friday of 2010 and the Single Main Truth of Weight Loss; the True Friends of a Fat-fighting Blogger; A Medication to Look Into if You have Hypothyroidism and Mood Issues; and the Books that Helped Me "Flip the Switch" and Get Diet-Serious...

Scale Truth: 233.8

Diet Truth: To lose weight you need to eat fewer calories than your body burns.

You and I need to EAT less than the body actually needs to function within a span (of a day, a week) in order to burn fat and lose weight.

I get really frustrated with myself when I make excuses for my own sloth and gluttony--so feel free to slap me a bit, with love, when I do. So, you can imagine that I also get frustrated when fellow bloggers do the same.

We all reach our place of readiness to change differently in different ways and times. It's often a MYSTERY! Why? Why now?

I"m 50. Took me a friggen long time to actually FEEL like I COULD DO IT. Previously, it was small attempts that showed quick regains. Depression continually harrassed my efforts. I have a multitude of excuses--menopause, anxiety disorder, depression, hypothyroidism, two medications that open up appetite. All true.

But the fact remains that even for someone as metabolically messed up as me, if I eat less than my body burns, I lose weight. I may lose slower than some other stellar bloggers, but I do lose. Slowly, in my way, I lose if I eat low-calorically.

One thing gastric bypass and other WL surgeries proved is that ANYONE can lose weight with lower caloric intake. Even people who claimed they could not....could.

Studies show people underestimate what they eat. We forget the spoonful of this, the sip of that. We forget the forkful from hubby's plate. The nibble of cheese. We eat 3/4 cup of rice and say it was 1/3 cup. We eat 8 ounces of meat and think it was 4 ounces.

We fool ourselves.

And we say we're dieting or on a plan, and then eat what we want.

We do all sorts of self-sabotaging things because:

1. we're not really ready
2. we want to be ready
3. we keep thinking it will happen with less effort

Well, all those described ME. Do they describe you?

I totally understand--I personally went through and KNOW--that it takes a while for switches to flip in some of us. Some of us decide to lose weight and just do it (like my sis). Some of us just can't seem to get over the food thing. We start each day with the best intentions and then go downhill as the hours pass.

But all the blogging desire in the world won't make the fat go. Only eating less.

Well, I could add move a lot more, but I know you can lose weight with just eating less more easily than becoming a marathoner. I've never seen a fat committed marathoner (people running lots of miles a day). But I don't move anywhere near that much and don't plan to. It's easier to cut out dessert and eat half or a third of what I used to than exercising 4 hours a day.

If you're blogging to get that flip switched: Yes, do that. Keep in the game. Persevere. Sometimes, just staying IN THE DESIRE, IN THE MINDSET, finally gets the mojo going.

For me, 3 years of mostly dithering in a diet blog (http://onceuponadiet.blogspot.com) is what kept me from going back to 300 pounds. It got me down to the 260's (20 pounds and change loss in 3 years...how slow can one get?) while my brain and spirit got to the point of becoming serious about change.

Why so long? Yes, partly the depression. Partly the health issues. Mostly the commitment.

To a foodie, to a chronic overeater, to a binger, knowing that you have much less food to run to daily is scary. It is. Admit it already.

Self-sacrifice is scary. And giving up our calming, cheering, comforting food is terrifying.

But you have to let it go. Let the desire for health (or beauty or flexibility or better sex or more fashionable clothes or all of them) be greater than the desire for the pizzas, burgers, enchiladas, cakes, cookies, ice cream, mac n cheese, etc. Let the desire for virtue (gluttony is a sin, folks, if you're a religious person) be greater than the sin of food avarice. Of obssession with eating.

I fear every day that the binge-monster will rear its head. Every day I wake up and tell myself I'm in a war and I want to win.

I'm in a fight for my life, and I want to win.

I'm in a fight for my food sanity, and I want to win.

2011. Is this the year we win?

Let's make it the year gluttony bites the dust.

If you're blogging and in a rut and can't seem to move beyond the food, can't stop the scale from climbing, do what it takes to stop the climb or inertia: Read a lot of books on self-control, change, diets, for the inspiration factor. Read blogs of successful dieters. Do not make a habit of visiting the ones that ARE NOT MAKING PROGRESS except to drop a quick encouragement and move on. Seriously. If weight loss bloggers are not losing weight or grappling in a way that is beneficial (everyone goes through bad spells, but some bloggers teach us great things in those bad spells), don't linger. They may make you feel good about your own lack of progress, but they do nothing to spur you on.

 Seek the motivating. Put up motivational posters and saying. Get motivational computer wallpapers. Sign up for motivational emails.

Ask people to keep you accountable, even if it means verbally slapping you, rather than just patting your back when you gorge on trigger foods. People who JUST pat your self-destructive behavior ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS. Sorry. Commisseration is fine, but then it should be followed by a: "Do better. Pick yourself up and DO BETTER." Don't wallow. People who allow you to wallow are NOT helping you.

I love you guys who come here and remind me that I can do the hard work, that food is not stronger than me. Who will tell me if I slip up to get back on the fricken diet horse and kick caloric ass.  The one who doesn't care if I wallow in my fat is an enemy. The one who helps me out of my fat pit is a friend. See Proverbs 27:6 for the encapsulation of my philosophy.

If someone speaks less than tactfully to me, but ultimately helps me with that tactlessness, they are more of a friend than the sweet-worded person who does nothing to aid me in my quest for health. Which would you prefer: The loud and gruff general who makes sure you survive the war and win for your allies, or the gentle and kind general who gives you no vigor and does nothing to arm you and prepare you and push you to the front lines to win?

Don't tell me it's okay when I overeat. Tell me I'm human, and humans can learn and do better.

As the year closes, here are books you should read if you are in a rut, stuck, can't make the leap above food. They helped me more than any other books this year:


THE END OF OVEREATING: Taking Control of the Insatiable American Appetite  by David Kessler
SWITCH: How to Change Things When Change is Hard by Chip Heath and Dan Heath

If they help you, too, then drop me a note. I'll feel good knowing it.

Because one of the reviewers said the treatment of GLUTTONY (the vice/sin) is well done, this is the next book I want to get:
Glittering Vices: A New Look at the Seven Deadly Sins and Their Remedies

Until then, I'll reread Frederica Mathewes-Green (She's an Orthodox believer and one of my fave "faith" writers): To Hell on a Cream Puff :

But gluttony is not about pleasing plumpness; our inclination to associate it with external effects alone shows how reluctant we are to confront the sin-in-the-heart. The impulse to gluttony is a sign of being out of harmony with God’s provision and creation, and can disrupt the spiritual lives of people of every size. External dimensions are no predictor of internal rebellion.

Previous generations of Christians knew this. Overindulgence in food didn’t just lead to thickened waistlines and arteries; it led to spiritual disaster.

And here's a book someone recommended I just got by "royal mail" today--yes, I ordered it from England, cause I'm serious about losing this fat, people: EATING LESS: Say Goodbye to Overeating. It's by Gillian Riley. Whether it will help me or not, dunno. But someone I like quite a lot and whom I respect for her amazing loss this year recommended it on her blog, and that's enough for me.

And if you have hypothyroidism (I have Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, have had it for 20 years) and are on Synthroid or Levoxyl, strongly suggest you research and ask your endo about Cytomel in conjunction. It's made a huuuuge difference for me mood-wise and in terms of energy. I suspected I was not converting properly. Since a few weeks after taking it, I felt the difference. Ask your doc! Research it! Google it! Don't ask me for the research. Find it. :D

Happy New Year, to the fat and to the thin and to the in-betweeners. Let's all be well!

Day 25 Spawn of SoDDDY Challenge: Holding at 233.8, Prepared for "Feast" With good Breakfast, and Hoping to See a New Low for the New Year! HAPPY 2011 EVEN, PEOPLE!

No weight change. I guess I had my whoosh and now my body is back to being laidback. :)

I had my egg white veggie omelette, Bagel Thin with neufchatel, Canadian bacon, coffee, water breakfast. I have fruit and yogurt to take with me to the NY Eve party to help arm myself against the onslaught of traditional food temptations. (Oh, lawdy!)

Hubby set up the XBox Kinect for DANCE CENTRAL. He's done the Lady Gaga and Dirty Vegas and will be sore no doubt. I havent yet (got up late), but I'm the one who asked for it to get me moving some. Anyone have it?

I found the Wii was too easy to cheat and do less movement. This baby, you gotta use the whole body. So, like Dance Dance Revolution, it should burn up some nice number of calories. Plus, it's good tunes, not generic stuff like some exercise videos.

Anyway, my main goal for today--other than have fun--is to not mess up my good week and weigh-in decently for the last Spawn weigh-in. I'd like to have 3 lbs gone, but I think that's unreasonable for me. If it's at least 2, I'm fine.I had some close to 1200 calorie days, some closer to 1600 days. But I haven't gone over this week.

I hope my challenge-mates enjoy the last day of 2010. It's a year where I finally made progress toward my goal. No tiny progress, but GOOD progress. I have some other major goals for next year (three, to be exact), but priority ONE will be getting healthy--slimmer and fitter. If I can make goal weight next year instead of 2012, I will be one seriously happy camper.

I'd like to thank again all the supportive challenge-mates and fat-fighting bloggers who've been so kind and encouraging. Really, my heart is full of gratitude.

My prayers are for our safety (yeah, drunk drivers out there!) and joy for today's celebrations. And for a new, fresh wind tomorrow that will drive us toward our prizes in 2011.

God bless...

Day 23 Spawn of SoDDDY Challenge: Is My Scale Wonky? Or is it just a good week so far? My Two Meals Yesterday & a Recommendation if You like Both Convenience and Black Beans...and even are vegan; GIANT KILLING has me hooked and inspires a dieting metaphor, natch...

I had to climb up and down on Tanita-san several times today (that sounds a bit X-rated...hmm?):

233.8

Really?

Okay, I did stay under 1300 calories (1284), just barely made my water, but made it. So, maybe it's just a good week.

Or Tanita-San is playing a joke on me. :D 'Cause that's 2.2 lbs down in 3 days. My stubborn apple-shape waist is not moving, though. Grrrrrr.

I will add that yesterday was a lowfat, high fiber, high carb, moderate protein day. Here's yesterday's ratio: 53c/20f/27p. My DNA test said I needed to do a low calorie version of  high carb/low fat, but I almost never make the lowfat aspect, but that percentage for fat was dead-on to the recommendation. 20% of calories. So, whether this is a correlation or not....there it is.

You know, last time we had an arctic blast reach Miami, I lost well. The last two days/nights have been shivery ones. I was joking about shivering burning calories last time. I'm not joking so much right now. Maybe not turning on the heat is a very, very good idea. heh.

I ate two meals yesterday:

breakfast: scrambled egg whites with fat-free cheese and pico de gallo (had some leftover from dinner the night before from Lime Fresh Mexican grill). WS hot cakes with sugar-free syrup. Half a red grapefruit. 1/3 cup fresh blueberries. 3 slices of turkey bacon (the extra lean JennieO brand, which I'm gonna toss, as it's crappy. I ate it just...cause. How dumbass is that? Don't buy this brand. The other turkey bacons I've had were fine. This one is awful.) Coffee. Water. Fiber supplement.

lunch: whole instant cup of Dr. McDougall's black bean with lime soup (it's an instant soup, but it's really amazingly yumsy...comes out creamy with Mexican type spicing). Leftover tortilla chips baked with fat free and lowfat cheese and fat free sour cream and pico de gallo for topping. 3/4 cup of chopped yellow and red bell peppers. coffee. water. As a treat: 3 low carb biscotti by BariWise (lemon flavor, and I sprinkle crystalized lemon on it to make it tart). Vitamins/supplements.

Today:
breakfast: WS hot cakes, 1/2 cup blueberries, sugar-free syrup, 1/2 grapefruit, 1/2 small papaya, coffee, water, vitamins, fiber supplement.


lunch: raw green bean casserole--green beans, tahini, lemon, garlic. :D Yum.

No dinner for me. Hubby and I  were engrossed watching GIANT KILLING--a soccer anime that first aired in Spring, I believe, but we are watching now. I hate sports, but this has me totally caught up. Funny and good characterization with nice game twists. The title refers to the little guy (like a Jack or a David) winning over the Giants. The underdog team getting its act together under a very skilled and amusing coach. Love it!  Then I caught up on the last issue of BLEACH manga online and started wondering how Ichigo-boy is gonna get his powers back....cause he will!

It's no stretch to say we fatfighters, particularly those of us who got into the big, morbidly obese numbers, are out to kill our own Giants--whether it's trigger foods, emotional issues regarding foods, lack of exercise, whatever. We're the underdogs and we're the giants...and one has to win. So, might as well be the slim underdog inside us fighting to get free.

I actually love the inspiring messages in many manga and anime. The Japanese have a common saying used a lot: "Do your best"

A character will often say it to themselves, as well: "I will do my best". Whether it's a school life manga with a character overcoming a mean clique or trying to get better in athletics or get a higher ranking to get into a better college, the head band comes on and the cry goes out that they will DO THEIR BEST!

And because so many anime and manga have superheroic types, I sometimes tap into that when I'm exercising and feel I can't do ONE MORE REP!  I imagine myself as one of these never-give-up characters and just push on. This is why I had my trainer upload Japanese anime themes into a playlist for me. On days when I just don't WANNA...on goes the anime music and I become Ichigo or Yoruichi or the  Fullmetal Alchemist or L or any character who just refuses to stop trying to reach their goal and win the fight! Okay, so maybe not L's eating habits (a skinny pale dude who eats sweet treats and sugar cubes all dang day to fuel his mighty brain!)

Feel like a superhero or superheroine today. Kick fat's ass! GAMBARE! (Do your best!)

As One Dieting Year Closes, A Grateful Shout-Out To Some of My Bloggy Commenters/Supporters! HUGS GALORE!

It's tough doing this dieting gig on one's own. I certainly don't do well going it solo. Hence, my previous blog and this one. On both blogs, I've had people who were encouragers. Encouragers rock!

I'd like to thank some of my regular commenters on this, my new blog (hence one with fewer followers than my old one). You guys make me feel like I can do it on days I feel less than delightfully in-control. I hope I've added some cheer and encouragement to your journey. I surely do.

So, thank you to EVERYONE who has ever dropped by to say hello and give me tips and a pat on the back or a caution. To all who're following me--wow, I hope I have something useful to say to help you, I really do!-- Thank you. Here, have a hug. (((((Yes, You)))))

I know it's a bit disheartening when one visits blogs regularly to chip in comments and support...and those bloggers never give support in return. Feels sad, right?  I will try hard NOT To do that to you.  I know it matters to know someone's hearing your voice, yes?

Now, for a special thanks to these terrific bloggers--in no special order, so don't read anything into that, hah ,and the url is to make it easy for you to cut/paste into your links list or whatever--that you should go visit, read, and follow right now:

Kimberly who's tapping into the skinny Woman Inside Her http://thewomaninsideme.blogspot.com/

Ann who's no longer living as large she used to and, at the rate she's dropping poundage, will not be large at all pretty soon:  http://annssmalljourney.blogspot.com/

Anne who's not letting carbs trip her up and who is one of those "Nurse Angels" God put on the planet to give cheer to the ailing:  http://carbtripper.blogspot.com

Kelly, the Happy Texas Trophy Wife, who surely deserves that trophy! http://happytexans.blogspot.com/

Karen, who (sun) shines her heart's light supporting us fat loss bloggers http://sunshinesheart.blogspot.com/

Digger , who's determined to figure out What's Eating Her http://digr-diggingout.blogspot.com/

Debbie, who is WW her way to quitting the overeating  http://justquiteating.blogspot.com/

Beth who Strikes furiously at Obesity (and I don't think is obese anymore, anyway, so she won with a K.O.), a most eloquent Lady of Bloggy Letters: http://obesitystrike.blogspot.com/

Magical Diandra who has some pretty interesting stories and rants (even if I don't comment, really, cause well, um, I"m a dork?) http://shortstoriesandmadrants.blogspot.com/

Tamzin who's lost a lot more than Just One Inch http://justoneinch.blogspot.com/

The Fat Angry Blogger who's progressively LESS fat, which means her next blog will be titled The Slim Tranquil Blogger. :) http://fat-angry-blog.blogspot.com/


Suzi, the ever Spunky Encourager and Challenge rah-rah-gal at http://spunkysuzi.blogspot.com/

My hope and prayer is that  2011 is a magical, wonderful, healthful, slimming, muscle-building, creative-potential realizing, joy-maximizing, uber-blessed year for all of us. And that we continue to cheer our efforts on!

Amen and Amen!

Day 22 Spawn of DDDY Challenge: Another downtick and Feeling bones! The pleasure of sensual, though unhealthy, fat...some good links...and Enjoying new Athletic Shoes...Oh, and Stay warm, ye snowbound!

Tanita-san: 234.6

I had a really nice surprise, as you can see, with today's hop on the scale. That's 1.4 down from Sunday. Not expected at all, but quite cheering.

Yesterday's calories fell just over 1400. 55 minutes of Pilates. That must have helped.

Apple Shape by Carb Tripper

When I woke up, I ran my hands up and down my torso as I usually do to assess bloat. I don't like to weigh if I feel bloaty. Since I had some chicken teriyaki--not much about 2 to 2.5 ounces--and the soy sauce is my bloat enemy, I was checking. Instead of feeling bloat, I felt bones down there--pelvic bones--and up here--a rib. Strange to feel anything other than cushy fat. Those of you who've been morbidly obese know what I mean, right? And those of you who are apples like me know that best of all. The layers and layers of abdominal fat obscure all the bony bits in there. Make for great bedfellows.

(Yes, it's true: Fat feels good. Really good, way better than bones, so heck, I used to feel up my fat torso just to enjoy the cushiness of all that adiposity! I totally get why harems were populated with lush women. If I were some caliph, I'd want me some fat love bunnies, too! I remember when hubby had 35 extra pounds. Man, his back and sides were so superyummy! cushy! Now, he looks hot, but you can feel the bonesies in bed. Too bad there's not a way to look really sleek and hot and FEEL really soft and cushy. hahahaha)

I remember when I first started Pilates in 2008 weighing in the 270s. In the first sessions, you are learning imprinting and there's an exercise where you put your thumbs on your lower ribs and your pinkies on your hip bones. I could not feel bones. I just could not find my hipbones. Or pelvic bones. It was a bit embarrassing. Now, I surely can find them. :D

I haven't done any meal planning for today. I wish I had gotten extra "fresh Vietnamese veggie rolls" cause I still want some. Yum. Maybe I'll get some tomorrow when I'm running errands.

I have another set of salad fixings in the fridge, and that was so yummy yesterday, I'll just replicate it. Lots of coffee and tea to keep the chill away. Whoa, you guys up north must be bone-shaking down to your marrow. Those blizzard pics make my teeth chatter. Stay warm!

Hope my niece and the kiddies can get home in a timely matter. They went to NYC and hoped for snow, and I suppose this is a case of getting MORE than one bargained for. At least the kids are having a great time with the white stuff--snowmen, snowballs, jumping around. :)

Speaking of having fun jumping around, I love my new athletic shoes. Because I overpronate and have wide feet (less wide than before, but still), I got a new pair of Brooks (these are great for problem feet and wide feet and overpronators) and a pair of Asics. I've been really enjoying the extra boost of energy I get with new, springy sneakers! I bought them a few weeks ago in preparation for the exercise portion of the Challenge. I thought I'd have to drop out beforehand when it went to 1200 calories, but Allan noted on his blog that we could try it and then drop out if we weren't suited. So, I figured, why not give it a shot at least. One should try, even if skeered a bit. :) I guess I don't have as much faith in my ability as I would wish, but I'm willing to give it a solid shot. Hence, the sneaks. Hence, eating some days in the lower calorie range.

Ann is also getting ready for the exercise challenge. Are you?

Oh, and if you haven't dropped by, visit Carb Tripper for a Learning Day full of great doodles and useful links for those interested in obesity (for personal or other reasons). (Her doodles are da best!)

And if you're ready to QUIT OVEREATING and start a diet/weight-loss regimen, then do read this article. It's more about how to prepare to do it and the right environment/mindset/planning than a New Year's resolution, but it's a really good one and if you've been off plan or just starting a journey to normal weight, you should read it.

Anyway...

Let's make this cold week one that burns off tons of calories. Shiver away, people! Fire up the metabolism!

Be well today and DO NOT OVEREAT. Okay?

Ciao!

Day 21 Spawn of SoDDDY Challenge: All is Calm Appetite-Wise and All is Bright Mood-wise, but I'm COLD! And pondering the special New Year's Food traditions that will come a-tempting, notably "empanadillas" Cuban-style...

It's chilly in Miami, folks. For those of us not used to it, teeth-chatteringly so (overnight, this am). But the day was bright and beautiful, so it fit my mood.

Weight held at 236.

I had a mild moment of food-yearning after Pilates, but that calmed down. Breakfast was 440 and lunch was 320 calories, and my fluids are up to 12 glasses. So, I have from 420 (for the 1200 calorie lower level) to 1000 calories (for the goal-calorie weight level) left for the day. I've been eating mostly a bit under 1760 (goal weight level), with the occasional close to 1200 day if my appetite is really low. Today, it's feeling middling-low, so I might end up around 1300 to 1400.

Had a lovely muilt0color salad for lunch that had spinach, sliced strawberries, some almonds, some cranberries, yellow/orange/red sweet peppers, part of a chopped boiled egg, a bit of shredded cheese, and some honey mustard dressing. The combo of flavors was very satisfying. I had three strawberries with a shot of fat free whipped topping for dessert. The strawberries were surprisingly numsy. I expected them to be more sour, but they were sweet and delicious.

I have a  yen for those very low-cal vegetarian fresh Vietnamese rolls (no shrimp or chicken, just carrots and lettuce and celery in a steamed rice paper sheet). I love the combo of the glutinous steamed low-cal wrapper with the crunchy lettuce and veggies and a hint of the sweet dipping sauce. I sometimes add some peanut butter or crushed peanuts for added flavor and protein/fat. It's one of my fave things lately.

My brother is making the family's traditional meat pies for New Year (my mom used to painstakingly make them from total scratch and the family would help with all the grinding of the ingredients), so I'm gonna find a way to make room for one of those fried babies. It's one of those things he only makes once a year, always for New Year, and they go fast (since the relatives crave them). He tends to save one for each of the siblings (since I'm often sick on holidays and have missed NYE events from time to time). No one made them as good as mom--the particular crunch of the shell, the savory quality of the meat's spicing--but she took no shortcuts. It was a lot of work and worth it in taste and calories, frankly. Hers were bigger than brother's, so maybe calorically, that's a good thing. I figure one is probably easily a minimum of 400 cals. Maybe even 500. I am not really sure. Guesstimating. I did bake one of mine a few years ago to cut down on calories, but it just isn't the same experience. Ah, well.

What would be REALLY dangerous is if while my bro makes the empanadillas, my P.R. born SIL makes pasteles. Oh man. Another rare, home-made treat for our family. Since my SIL's mom passed on, I don't think I've had any. But those are great, too... starchy with bits of pork inside and great with ketchup or hot sauce. No clue about the calories on those, but I'm sure there's some Puerto Rican cuisine site online with the facts.  Although they both get boiled and are wrapped in leaves and string like Cuban tamales, and both have pork bits inside,  the texture and taste aren't the same. One is plantain-based, and one is corn-based.  I like them both, though. They are foods that are rarely seen/eaten by us and so are special and say, "celebrate!" with every bite.

I'll take ONE of either over any ubiquitous holiday treat. Something about the home-made taste of tradition that you only get maybe once a year.

So, I guess just like Christmas, I'll have to plan and stay watchful of what goes in the mouth. I want another week of losses despite the temptations.

And I hope you can maneuver through the landmines of food, too, whatever it is that YOUR family does for New Year's Eve and Day!

Spawn Weigh-In: A good week despite 2 Christmas Parties and 2 Pizza Events

As most folks well know, this was a week of temptations. Fortunately, the scale was happy with me:

236.0

A couple pounds lost this week. For me, snail-girl, outstanding.

I ate one of my supertop trigger foods--pizza--twice, once a delivery from Vocelli's cause hubby wanted some. I had ONE slice with a salad.

The next day, we had lunch out with sis, and she had a pizza yen (it's one of her main craving foods, too, we share that). So, we went to Anthony's Coal-fired pizza. And I got a salad and sis and I shared the personal size fresh mozza/basil one--about 10 inches cut in four slices--and she had 2 2/3's slices and I had 1 1/3.  It was really tough not eating the foccacia bread and more pizza, but having a tiny pizza rather than a large one made a huge difference. Less temptation.

Christmas dinner was not in my control, as it was not at a siblings's home as usuall, but an in-law extended family place. I brought a salad for myself, as that side of the family is vegetable averse. I was right. Only starchy plantains and potatoes. No salads/crudites. There were lots of desserts-cream puffs, brazo gitano, buche du noel, ambrosia, rice pudding, chocolates, cookies--and lots of chips and stuff.

I had some roast pork (about 2 ounces) and turkey fricasseed breast with olives and potatoes (more of that, since I love the stuff) and congri (black beans cooked with rice, traditional stuff), boiled plantains with some EVOO. The fricasee was excellent. Totally enjoyed that.

I hd for treats between 1/4 and 1/3 cup of ambrosia (made with fruit and yogurt and marshmallows) and 2 dark chocolate squares. I took my own bottles of water. :)

I got lots of nice comments on the weight loss, including one, "You look TOO good, girl!" I felt pretty and energetic and that was pleasant, indeed. Some of these folks at the party hadn't seen me since last Christmas, so I guess the drop was noticeable.

Yesterday's Christmas dinner at my sister's was prime rib with asparagus, mushrooms, roasted sweet potatoes and potatoes, and arugula salad. I had my waer and coffee. I took my own 60 calorie dessert and had a square of Godiva dark chocolate. My contribution was the arugula, asparagus, and mushrooms. :)

On both days, I kept the intake at breakfast/lunch very low to balance what I knew would be larger meals in the evening.

It worked out fine. No bingeing.

So, felt great joy and cheer. It wasn't a very Christmassy-feeling Christmas, but I felt so happy and laughed and enjoyed being with family and eating yummy stuff in moderation.

Onto the New Year....let's get to goal weight!

Spawn Day 17: Sleepy, Busy, May not Blog Again Till Holiday Feasts Done this Week..

I'm tired. I'm sleepy. I didn't sleep much.

Weigh in: same as yesterday.

I kept a running caloric tally in my head as I didn't get into Spark. Just under 1500. Water done, just under accelerated, but met minimum.

Today, doing fine. Was out. Car done. Lunch with hubby and sis. Home. Feel like zombie. Did a Kimi no Todoke anime marathon while doing nails last night (prep for color today, and yeah, I do my own pedicure). Made me feel good. I love sweet, innocent , friendship, romantic stuff like that.

Weather lovely. Took pics of ibises. Took pics of my feet in new pumps (I have ankles again, so I can wear girly shoes again).

Totally not in the mood to blog or even be on the computer. I'm gonna nap or have decaf. Not sure. :) More fluids, for sure.

Calories so far: just under 800. Plan to have one more meal and maybe a snack, depends on when I crash. Don't wanna crash too early, case tomorrow is the Nochebuena festivities, so if I crash early, get up too early, then I'll be sleepy mid-party. My body doesn't do these rhythm/schedule changes well in my dotage.

Happy pre-Christmas Eve. Drink your water. Eat moderately. If I don't blog again til after Christmas, then I wish you the bestest holiday ever!

Sorry to be dull. Later...

Day 16 Spawn of SoDDDY Challenge: Where finally the body releases its fat hoard and Tanita-San grins at me, the veggie illusion pasta, and where I know I will not get enough sleep tomorrow so I'll go from Vampire to Zombie...

Another Spawny day was done and my calories ended at 1411   (49c/31f/20p).

After holding at the same weight a few days and being sodium-up a couple (frustrating a bit, yes), finally the downward whoosh:

236.8

That leaves me 20.8 lbs to lose to NOT be "severely obese" anymore and just "obese". Once you've lost 62 lbs, 21 doesn't seem as daunting. I'll get there.

I was actually surprised by a nice lower number since last night was pasta night. Hubby and I both looooooooooooooove our pasta marinara. Pasta/noodles are comfort foods for me. For sure.

I made mine with 3 cups of cooked zucchini, mushrooms, and spinach, filled a large pasta bowl with that big mass of veggies, then put the pasta on top (FiberGourmet, fewer calories, a bazillion fiber grams) then fat free mozzarella and sauce. It looked like a total binge amount of pasta, but was actually just the mass of veggies pumping it up.  My "veggie illusion pasta". Made my brain feel like I was being massively spoiled. I miss the tons of sauce and cheese I used to use, but my scale likes it better this way. Between the veggies and sauce, I got like 8 servings of veggies in one meal.

Tomorrow, lots to do to prep for holiday party, and one of the chores I have to do is get my car into the mechanic. This means that I will, essentially, not sleep much. I'm on vampire time, so I go to bed round 6 am. I have to get up early....I guess this means...3 hours sleep, maybe? I suppose I can crash and burn early, too.

I don't do well--scale-wise, food-wise, etc--when I miss sleep. This one is unavoidable. The brakes need tending to. And if I want my car back the same day--gotta go in early, then have things to do that are holiday related, so I can't come home and sleep first.

I'll just do my best not to freak in zombie-mode (different than vampire mode, really).

Hope others are having good whooshie days, fatwise. Stay away from the holiday junk. Have your healthful freggies. Enjoy the music and lights and smiles (there are smiles, right)

Later....

Day 15 Spawn of SoDDDY Challenge: The deliciousness of fatty Cobb salad convenience, a few chilly glimpses of eclipse, and amazement at the self-sabotage all around us while I have a full-on rant about holiday food nuttiness....

Anyone watch the eclipse? I used to be a real avid skywatcher (got my first telescope when I was 13 and it was love with the stars/planetss/etc thereafter). I used to stay out all night to watch meteor showers and stay through the duration of eclipses, but in the neighborhood we're in now, I don't feel safe out at night in the yard, so my skywatching is curtailed. I did catch bits of it as I went in and out in the chilly night. Lovely. The full eclipse phase was particularly beautiful with the rusty-dark moon in shadow and all around it the most beautiful stars of winter--Orion, Taurus, Canis Major...  I mean, it was a bejewelled display with that smoky red lunar stone as the centerpiece. I hope you caught some of it.

Yesterday, my calories made it to  1569 (42/36/22 ratio, too much fat). Made the water and then some. Had low hunger until later in the day, when appetite came back.

Holding at 238.0.

I gotta say that I could get addicted to that Ready Pac Cobb Salad I picked up at Publix. What caught my eye as I was shopping for produce was the big 290 (for the calories) on the label. Of course, those calories were heavy on the fat! But man, so tasty. It was a crazy flavor bomb in my mouth. If you're watching fat, stay away. If you're low-carbing, this baby is insanely yummy for about 300 cals and super-duper convenient for take-to-work type lunches (if you have a fridge or cooler to keep them in, I guess).

Speaking of fatty deliciousness: What's with all the cinnamon rolls, cookies, pies, cakes, and assorted crap my blogging compatriots are indulging in? Seriously, reading our challenge leader's post today echoed what was in my own brain.

I'm hardly the epitome of any sort of really self-deprivation type dieting, but the last thing me, a conditioned overeater, should be doing at ANY holiday is baking up a bunch of all-out butter/sugar/carb-bombs to tempt the hell out of everyone around us.

First off: We obese overeaters should never be baking a bunch of crap for us or anybody. It's counter-productive for us and it's not good for them. Trust me. Kids, no matter how active and lean, don't need to eat half a dozen cookies and a slice of cheesecake just cause it's a holiday. What? Do we want them to be fat, too, and struggle like we do?

Second: How many can really avoid the temptation? For real...

Third: Do we wanna addict another generation to eating tons of sweets/treats and connecting those with love/holiness and they get to pig-out seasonally as well?

I understand that there are holiday traditions and they have meanings beyond mere taste. Emotions, nostalgia...bonds.

But I've seen a couple bloggers who are not just baking one junk food item that has meaning (and if it's loaded with butter/oil/sugar/flour/carbs or a combination thereof, yes, it's junk). It's an uberfest of baking and frying. Does any family need dozens and dozens of items that strain the pancreas and fatten the belly?

I know my family feast will have certain traditional items--quite a lot sanely nutritious, with actual protein and fiber and vitamins and minerals and spices and good stuff, and quite a lot that are pure trash in the nutrition/dieting-aid dept. I have no clue as to what specifically most of the guests will bring. I can only be certain of a few things, and what I bring, natch.

So, while  accept that the holiday is usually just ONE day (maybe more, but generally the big feasting falls on ONE day), and it's not a horrible thing to enjoy the special foods on that one day, even enjoy more than one's diet-level caloric allotment (here I differ from some other dieting bloggers, and that's fine, the world is not full of automatons, but individuals) in order to bask in those memories/bonds/emotions; why is it that there is a week or two weeks or three weeks of eating all the accompanying crap?

Are we just looking for that excuse to overeat? "Well, it's the season. Let's have another cookie! Let's break open that pie! Let's fry up some churros and hit it with some cocoa made with butter! Just like grandma used to make!"

I dunno. I do think we just want a reason to go nuts and totally lose logic about what's sane treat-enjoyment. I mean, we got this fat cause we AREN'T sane about food. And this is like this retro-trip back to an all out vacation to the Land of --and this is Beth's term, but it fits, and if you hate cuss words, look away and skip to the next paragraph-- Food Fuckery.

Part of me is worried that I will fall into the FF pit, because everyone around me seems happy to dig the pit and stock it with candy cane spikes.

Um, if you have fat people in your family, stop with the baking already, stop with the frying and overloading fridges and finding ways to show love with food. Can we show love with something else? Cause with little kids getting diabetes, the idea of a month of candy canes, sugar cookies, pumpkin pies, caramel popcorn, chocolate truffles, spice cakes, donuts, funnel cakes, churros, and what-not is like saying, "Yes, die sooner. Fewer Christmasses, but we'll die in a happy sugar-fat haze."

Oh, man, I went overboard. Sorry. I just worry about myself and all the obese--and there are LOTS of them--younger folks in my family. Lots of us are HUGE, HUUUUUUUUUGE, and the pies, cakes, and crap will be on display like a trough to get us into our caskets sooner.

Christmas has a lot more about it, going for it, special about it that doesn't have calories. With our weight issues in the US, it's time to find new, non-fattening ways to say, 'I love you. Merry Christmas."

And if that came across mean, sorry. I'm more distressed and worried than mean. Oh, well.

On to another day of taming the food demons. Make it a great Tuesday, k?

Day 14 Spawn of SoDDDY Challenge: Pilates, Rediscovering My Love of Orange Pekoe, and Not Weighing Today since I did the Soy Sauce thing Yesterday...and that means..well, you know. :)

I felt really good and strong today in Pilates. Breathing was great. Allergies weren't clogging my nose. Did have some eczema flare-up and some stiff joints (probably all related, ie, inflammation), but just moved past the pain gently and felt better afterwards, though I'm still joint-achey. Some days, I just feel like I can really do the whole hour-long routine with good stamina, and this was one. I did not feel remotely pooped out afterwards, just like I got some good strength and flexibility done.

I didn't weigh in cause we did teriyaki and sushi last night, and I don't handle Asian soy well. I felt the bloatiness in my tummy this AM (well, only sleeping 4.5 hours didn't help), and decided to spare myself the sodium affected weight check. Not a big deal. I have an official weekly weigh-in on Friday or Saturday (Friday for this blog, Saturday for Challenge). It's just a way for me to see how what I eat affects things. I know how soy sauce affects things.

Yesterday's calories: 1342  (ratio: 46c/28f/26p)
Fluid intake was more than accelerated.
All is well, challenge-wise.

Today, I feel more peckish than yesterday. Breakfast was a light 161 (egg whites, fat and 2% scheese and 2 slices light 7-grain with tea and milk), lunch was 447 (skinny vanilla latte, meatball salad, 1/2 grapefruit), and I had a snack (as I said, peckish) that came to 250 (1 hard boiled egg, a small muesli roll, 1 tsp peanut butter, 1 tsp fruit spread, and tea with milk). I need a bit more water/fluids to make my level. :)

I usually hit the coffee (reg and decaf), but today, I had a yen for tea. Specifically, this was due to watching a YouTube video on making Royal Milk Tea (which I've never had). This gave me a serious milk tea craving...so I've been having it today. I love Twining's Orange Pekoe, which is super numsy with milk and sweetened. Mom used to make it like that for me (back when the only caffeinated tea we had in the house was Lipton). Nice change...

Total Calories so far:  858
Total Fluids: 112 oz

.

I so have to try these frozen burritos! 7 grams of fiber and fewer than 200 calories?! AND ...Are these the worst snack of 2010?

Read the Evol burrito review HERE

I hope these are better than the Bear Naked Granola--these were acquired/put out by the same dudes--which neither I nor my husband liked. :)

I have not had any frozen burritos that I really loved, and those were more than 200 cals. We shall see.

I have a huge weakness for Mexican food. If these babies are numsy, it's nice to have an easily nuked product to enjoy with fiber. Yes, I like having great poops. Bring on the beans!

~~~

Snack Girl says THESE are the worst snack of the year. I don't know if I'd agree with WORST, but I do think these suck the big one. I tried them when they first came out and went, "Ick" and threw out the rest. Even hubby, an Oreo-lover, thought they sucked. These in no way remotely satisfy any sort of cookie craving for me. And they certainly don't taste like Oreos. They are overpriced and Snack Girl is right on the other points. I'd rather have two of the real things for the same calories  (which are also crap, but they are addictive and tasty crap) than this pack. Then again, my junk treat of choice lately has been Coconut Pocky--which is crap that's 74 calories per serving. Save 26 calories and get more flavor and that Pocky "crispy-snap".

What's your worst snack of the year?

More "Shopping in My Closets"...piles and piles of stuff, some even from the early nineties!

I went through a bunch of stuff in the back room--clothes that I hadn't worn in a while. I made a big "donate pile" including some stuff still with tags on. I made a HUGE throw-out pile--clothes from size 24 on up to 30, most 26/28 and way too baggy. They're trash cause I don't donate stuff with wear or stains, natch.

Was sad to see some old fave girly chiffony tops that are too loose. Should have dug them out and worn them sooner.

Did find a possible Christmas or New Year top. A pretty blouse in my perfect style: 3/4 sleeves and Empire waist. It was a gift several years ago from my niece, back when I was about 280 or late 270s. Didn't fit. Now, fits nice. Very pretty black and white print with shiny beads in the high-waisted detail . Party-ready! I am gonna Woolite that baby and show it to my niece with a "Hey, I get to finally enjoy your gift!" Just need some nice smooth black slacks to go with it or a nice black at-to-above knee slimmish or A-Line skirt. I may have to hit the mall --Macy's, maybe--after all.

I found several hardly to never-worn size 18/20 athletic pants and size 22 denim leggings just starting to fall into "kinda loose" territory in the thighs, but otherwise wearable and comfy. Gonna wash em and wear em. Nice to have "new" stuff to wear.

I know some other challenge bloggers have been doing the "Lordy, need to find clothes that fit" thing. Maybe you, too, have back room or back-o-da-closet stashes. Get them out. Enjoy them before they stop fitting. :) Cause they' probably will stop fitting in a month or so.

Happy what's-left-of-Sunday.

For the Princess' Blog Record: Allan is...

A fabulous challenge leader
A terrifically loving husband
An amazing dieter
A hard-working man in the food business (of all things! How does he resist!)
A helpful and inspiring weigh-loss blogger
A no-holds-barred dieting bullshit detector

Perfect, no.

But if I gave an impression that I did not respect his efforts or was not impressed by his personal victory over food or thought he was some sort of complete ass,  then my bad.

We have different styles, but I am on board that he's RIGHT when it comes to a lot of the diet/exercise/water stuff and when he dissects the malingering tendencies in the weight loss community. (Hey, I have a previous blog that's virtually a paen to diet malingering. I wish someone had called my butt on it a while ago.) I may not like the tones employed, but I can always see the nuggets of truth in those reality checks.

I will say this: I've never found anyone more inspiring in 3+ years of reading dieting blogs. Allan and Lyn of Escape From Obesity have been my two main inspirations, and they are totally different types of bloggers. Each has helped me focus in different ways to get some poundage off. Both have been great helps to me and I feel gratitude to both, and even some long-distance affection.

Every day I think I'll fall on my face and not make it. Every day that I don't binge and stay within my calorie limit is a day that I make it not just to accessing an inner angel to fight the food demon, but to the dieting bloggers out there who give me hope, offer encouragement, blog their reality,  and kick my butt semi-gently to no-gently-at-all when needed.

So, there...I said it. :)

And if you wonder why I even bothered to post this, see the comments on the previous post.

Face the Truth Friday Becomes Speak What The Scale Says Saturday!

I hardly touched the puter Friday--too busy--so I missed Face the Truth Friday. So, we'll call this Speak What the Scale Says Saturday:

238.2

That's 2.6 down from last week's "official" weigh-in on Friday, before the post-concert fiasco. Not only was the fiasco made-up for, but that's double my usual loss. Perhaps those 1200 or so calorie days helped, huh? :)  I don't expect this to continue (ie, this rate) at goal-level.

It's wonderful to be working the diet in a new decade. It's great to see some size 20's fit me, some. :)  It's great to have new bras to keep the puppies in check. It's great to look forward to the 220's and new milestones.

I have nothing bad to say about showing a loss for a week where I ate MORE than last week. It's all good. I like eating more. I know the imperative that Allan and others feel to do this speedily and reach goal weight in the coming spring--his estimate for me has me at goal in May, 2011, though my rate of loss is slower than estimates show. Even when I was eating my calories perfectly at or below goal before Spawn, I didn't see 239 at the expected time. Took me longer. But even if it were June or July of next year, that's a year plus ahead of my own bloggy schedule. Amazing. Still....I like having the goal-level calories for flexibility and satisfaction. It'll take longer, but I will enjoy the journey and eat out with hubby without feeling overly constrained. That does matter to me. It may be a cop-out in some eyes, but it works for me so far.

Anyway, that's a Friday truth on Saturday, and it's still all good to me. At this rate, I will be under 200 pounds by my Anniversary. I intend to buy me a kick-butt dress and show of my legs to celebrate. And I have eschewed dresses for years. Hopefully, the sagging elephant skin won't be an impediment to that. If so, then I guess I'll become acquainted with Super Spanx. :D

Happy Weekend to all and to all an almost goodnight.

Day 12 Spawn of DDDY Challenge: Where I missed a day of blogging, got new bras and undies (in a smaller size) and hit the salt again, cause, you know, it's my weakness, hunger when water is delayed..... food/fluid log

Scale: 238.2

Was out and about Friday and made up on lost sleep today, hung around with hubby, did some shopping--finally got the new warm blankets and throws, got a hoodie and sweater for me, and got myself measured for new bras to fit my shrinking tatas and body. So, missed blogging Friday.

Since I had an endocrinology appointment, traditionally, we hit the Greek place next door. It was my breakfast. That meant a lot of sodium--feta, kalamata olives, tzatziki, stuffed grape leaves. I stayed under my caloric allotment, but expected a sodium uptick, as I had Greek twice (took half of my veggie gyro home and had a greek salad, small, to go with it for my second meal). I made sure to get in fruit to get nice postassium to balance some of that sodium, which I think did help, as the weigh-in was minimally up, as opposed to 2-5+ pounds up.

Calories yesterday: 1651
Breakdown: 40c/40f/20p (crazy!)

I had too much fat (double the ideal, really), but feta and Greek dressing alone adds up pretty fast. I had very little fiber (dang) and a whole lotta sodium. Not my most balanced day, though I got 7 servings of fruits/veggies and a good amount of protein.

Anyway, the tatas are now 44DD. I was really surprised about the DD. I was wearing D's, then those got big. But I got measured at Lane Bryant, TWICE, as I insisted she had to be wrong. hah. I tried the 44DD and it was snug but fit fine. I do wonder how big the puppies must have really been in those D's when I was 299+. Anyway, got a few bras and undies, as the ones I have now are just not supportive and, in some cases, ridiculously loose.

Most of the stuff I tried on, I had to go back for the smaller size. I kept estimating wrong which one would fit. A nice problem to have. I got a sweater in 18/20. Most of the stuff didn't appeal to me or just didn't suit, so I'm hoping by the time I need to get more outfits, they have a nicer selection. Pretty blah inventory yesterday. Anyone else disappointed with Lane Bryant's current offerings?

My skinny jeans that I started wearing last month are now being held up with a belt. The waist is too loose. Heh. And I put on a top and kept staring in the mirror as it really looked slimming on me (one I bought a few weeks ago and it was snug, just right now). Hubby commented numerous times on how I looked decidedly leaner. I think because the waist/belly finally stopped resisting and losses were showing there, that made a difference.

If anyone were to experiment with the water, I'll tell you what's gonna happen: You'll be really hungry if you don't drink it.

Now, don't get me wrong. I was NOT being rebellious or smug. I simply had a 35 minute drive on I95, and when I drink the usual water with breakfast, I end up haing to go every 20 to 30 mins. As anyone who drives a highway in a largish metro area knows, an accident or delay can happen unexpectedly. The LAST thing I wanted was to pee my pants on the way to the doctor. I still shudder to remember the horrendous nastiness of an impromptu but VERY necessary drop-in to the KFC bathroom last week. Pee didn't get on my pants groin, but I stepped in a puddle of pee and got it on my pants hem. Washing one's pants leg and lifting one's leg to dry it in a hand-blower in a cramped public bathroom is DISGUSTING!

So, I forewent the water (figured 'd catch up in the afternoon when I was not driving everywhichway). And I was HUNGRY.

But I didn't whiz on myself, and that was worth it.

It was a real hard effort not to polish everything off in the Greek place and then ask for more and eat hubby's as well. I kid you not, my appetite was on INSANE. I drank water there, had decaf x2, ordered an iced tea (yes, all three ordered at once just for me, which made the waitress go hmmm?) But it does catch up to you. I felt hungry a lot yesterday and I know it was the delay in getting the agua. Do not try this--unless you also can't pee your pants on the highway or something.

Today is fine. Had my water with breakfast and do not feel nuts. Niiiiiiice. :)

I'm gonna send Allan today's weigh-in, cause if we head out to enjoy the city tomorrow, I don't wanna forget and miss the deadline.

I hope my challenge-mates are rocking the calories and water. Happy Weekend, people!

Food Log:

Breakfast:
2 jumbo organic eggs fried in 1 tsp Smart Balance
1 cup fresh mushrooms sauteed in water with 1/4 cup onions and 1/4 cup fat free mozzarella
2 slices lite 7-grain toast with 1 tbsp whipped Smart Balance and 1 tsp Smuckers orange marmalade
2 cups coffee
8 glasses of water
calories: 450
fluids: 80 oz

Lunch:
1 serving Buitoni mushroom agnolotti (leftovers from earlier in the week) topped with
1/2 cup fat free mozzarella
1 (roughly) cups worth of asparagus and a tossed salad made with: 2 cups iceberg, romaine, and mixed baby lettuces, red/green/yellow pepper strips, cucumbers, 1 tbsp red wine vinegar, 1 tsp EVOO, oregano and 2 TBSP shredded parmesan
2 cups decaf
6 glasses water
calories: 756
fluids: 64 oz
calories so far: 1206
fluids so far: 144 oz (requirement met)

Dinner:

Total Calories:
Total Fluids:

Day 10 Spawn of SoDDDY Challenge: Yes, yet another drop, and noted BMI is below 39 now... food/fluid log

Tanita -san: 238.0

I weigh three or four times and take the number that comes up the most (say 2 out of three). Today it was 238.0, 237.8, 238.0. So, feels good. Almost another half-pound down. Last week's mess up has been more than made up for. This is what I weighed in 1998. The dieter's Time Machine. :)

This puts my waist at 41.25 or 41.5 inches, depending on the measuring tape. My BMI is 38.4. It's so sweet not to see FORTIES in the BMI anymore. Next measuring milestone goals will be:

1. Out of the 40's in waist size
2. Out of the 230's in scale measure
3. A normal size 20 in Women's clothing

The next Super-Milestone would be reaching 216: no longer severely obese, just regular obese. Hey, it IS a mental biggie for me. And a health biggie.

I not only have issues with my loose rings. I have issues with my LOOSE SHOES (as I posted about before.) I hate the idea of buying shoes to not have them fit 35 pounds, 40 pounds from now, since they're pricey. So, I'm gonna get ring guards and find a way to make the shoes I have fit better for a while. My shoes run about 100 bucks a pair, some more, some less, but since I have problem feet, I buy shoes with cushy insoles and made from foot comfort (SoftWalk, Easy Spirit, Naturalizer, Clarks...). But my sandals are swimming on my feet (not that I'm wearing them in this weather.  I've succumbed to sneakers more often just cause they're easy to fill out with puffy socks. :D

Yesterday's calorie count topped at 1298.  Again, I MEANT to eat at goal-level, but I just wasn't hungry for a big meal, so dinner was some crockpot made oatmeal with blueberries, peaches, and cinnamon. Felt very warm and comforting.  Then I was having a crazy pizza craving, so I took 2 string cheese and put 2 tbsp of marinara sauce on top wit sprinklings of oregano and garlic powder, nuked it until it was warm and gooey and ate that. Gave me the pizza vibe without the pizza calories.

Ratio of calories:  45c/31f/24p

I figure I'll just do this for now--eat at maximum goal-level on hungry days and eat less on less-hungry days, instead of just trying to hit ONE number. If nothing less, having the lesser days will leave room for a bit more feasting when we dine out, if I desire it.

Less cold today, though last night was still a chilly one for me. If it's the shivering making for the losses, then bring on the cold fronts.

Happy Thursday, make it healthy!

Food Log:

Breakfast:
3/4 cup egg whites made into an omelette with: 1 cup broccoli slaw, 1/2 cup cooked mushrooms, 1/4 cup chopped onions, 1 slice 2% American and 1/4 cup 2% shredded Cheddar, using 1 tsp of ICBINB spread to smear on the pan.
1/2 multigrain bagel w/ 1 tbsp organic Neufchatel and 2 tsp St Dalfour Four Fruits spread
1/3 cup red grapefruit sections
2 cups coffee
6 glasses water
calories: 524
fluids: 64 oz

Lunch:
Dinner:

Total Calories:
Total  Fluids:

In The Challenges of Christmas, Sir Allan Gave to Me....

Did you know that the first of the 12 days of Christmas is actually December 25 (or 26)?

I've known folks who think it's the 12 days leading UP to Christmas. Not so. It's December 25th, Christmas day,  through January 5th, the eve of Feast of the Epiphany ( January 6). It might be thought of as well as 12/26 through 1/6. Basically, the post-Christmas events.  Whichever tradition you follow, it extends the feeling of Christmas--family time, presents, food, fun.


I was born in Cuba, as were all my siblings and, natch, my parents. When I was little, I got gifts on January 6, left under my bed by the Three Wise Men, who brought gifts to the young Jesus. Here in Miami, there's a tradition in the Latin community to have a Three Kings Day Parade. (Not just here. All over the nation, but hey...)

Tangent: For those of you with great and/or weird senses of humor, you'd love the King Mango Strut--are you listening, Carb Tripper? Heh. The Strutters may need heavy coats and boots this year!

Because a niece is going out of town with her kids for December's holidays, my family will be harking back to the old tradition and exchanging gifts on the 6th of next month. I've advocated for this change for years: you can really get deals at those After Christmas sales, and you avoid the holiday shopping nightmare that happens post-Thanksgiving. I'm all over that. :)

Anyway, as you've noticed, surely, we're barraged by Christmas carols lately. Not a bad thing. I love Christmas music and singing along. In honor of the recent challenges (and current) hosted by Allan of Almost Gastric Bypass blog, I am belting out "The Sons and Spawn Challenge 12 Days of Christmas". No, it's not funny. It's almost all too real. A lot of what I've been eating (minus the briny turkey, as I didn't make the turkey for Thanksgiving. But his turkey sounded yummy and I wish he HAD made it for me. )

If you're a challenge mate, just change it to the stuff YOU are eating these challengey days. Make your own Spawny carol.

For brevity's sake, I'll just do the LAST stanza and list the days altogether. Feel free to sing out loud. It burns more calories than just reading:

On the Challenges of Christmas, Sir Allan gave to me:

Twelve water wagons
Eleven lists of lite meals
Ten egg white omelettes
Nine briny turkeys
Eight cups of decaf
Seven scooped out bagels
Six spoons for measures
FIVE PROTEIN SHAKES!
Four frozen bars
Three berry salads
Two apples, baked...
And a  bowl full of low-cal veggies.

Day 9 Spawn of SoDDDY Challenge: Another drop, Which Makes me Think Shivering is Good For Weight Loss! A look at my ratio and where I fell short in nutrients on my "vegetarian eating day", and Clothes I blew Right Past and Never Got To Wear!...Plus food/fluid log

Scale: 238.4

2/5ths of a pound down from yesterday. Nice.

Well, apparently, as long as one stays clothed and has a good blankie, one can survive being in the 30's temperature-wise and not use a heater. We're proof.

We only have ONE warm blanket, so last night was not very comfy for sleeping, especially when I first went to bed and everything on the bed was COLD!  This is Miami, for Pedro's sake! I don't own any substantial sweater. Don't own a coat. Don't own a warm cap or gloves. Never fricken need multiple blankets.

I need to go buy a coat and blankets. If January and February bring more of this, I need to be able to sleep better. I need a big, warm comforter, methinks. And jammies. I don't own warm jammies. I normally sleep nekkid.

So, maybe shivering does help with the losses. hahah

How low does it have to get outside before you put on the heater?

Yesterday's calories settled at 1566. I had a vegetarian day--only noticed at dinnertime I had had no chicken/meat. I had seven servings of fruits/veggies, and I just ran the nutritional feedback on SparkPeople and it came to this ratio: 56.5/25.2/18.3 in terms of carbs/fats/protein.  (Note: the DNA test said I should eat at 65/20/15 for optimal loss. )  I was low on a lot of nutrients: zinc, selenium, iron, panthothenic acid, copper, B12, etc. So, today, I'm gonna focus on getting in those nutrients, even if it means supplements. I'm always, always low on zinc and almost always on selenium and iron and B12 and folate. I'm used to being low on those (not being able to eat seafood, not being willing to eat organ meats, and limiting nuts effects such things).

On an NSV front: More clothes that fit and some that I was holding until "I got smaller" and now are too loose. I missed my chance. So, the pile of clothes barely or never worn for Goodwill or the Salvation Army is growing. I will encourage y'all in the challenge to try clothes on FREQUENTLY, especially if you've been saving outfits. I cannot believe how fast they were  in the category of "too loose". And one that I put away as too tight is now wearable and has a bit of looseness in the butt and thighs. So, stay on top of the "clothes waiting for a smaller size." You might bypass them altogether. And that sucks! Wasted moolah.

Here's to you and me and everyone in the challenge and all those NOT in the challenge but looking to lose some excess fat-baggage having a really good low-cal eating day. STAY WARM (or not...shiver away the pounds!)

Food Log:

Breakfast:
egg white omelette made with: 3/4 cups egg whites, 1 cup broccoli slaw, 1/4 cup shredded lowfat cheddar, using 1 tsp of EVOO to smear on the nonstick pan.
1 slice whole wheat bread with 2 tsp ICBINB spread and 2 tsp Smuckers apple jelly
1 Morningstar breakfast 'sausage' patty
1/2 red grapefruit
2 cups coffee
6 glasses water (2 before, 2 during, 2 after)
calories: 494
fluids: 64 oz

Lunch:
1 cup Amy's organic black bean chili with:
1 tbsp nonfat sour cream and 1/8th cup 2% shredded cheddar
1 pear (so sweet!) and 1 4-pack of Coconut Pocky (mmmmm)
2 cups decaf
6 glasses water
calories: 425
fliuds: 64 oz

Dinner:
1 cup cooked oatmeal with 1/3 cup blueberries and 1/2 cup canned peaches (in water, not syrup) and cinnamon/splenda
2 glasses water
calories : 201
fluids: 16 oz (not counting water in oatmeal)

Snack:
2 Organic Valley Stringles w/ 2 tbsp marinara sauce
2 glasses water
calories: 178
fluids: 16 oz


Total Calories: 1298
Total Fluids:  160 oz

Day 8 Spawn of SoDDDY Challenge: OMG! My Body is Such a Freak! hahaha Where I go Whoosh again the day after eating 500 calories MORE than the week of the Big Fail, and Where My Rings Fly Off In Public Toilets. Who understands this crap?! And one other "Honest Scrap" to Share with you. Plus food /fluid log.

Tanita-San: 238.8

Yeah, don't ask me. I don't get it. I didn't even poop this AM before weighing. I'll probably weigh something freaky again tomorrow or Thursday, ineplicably up and inexplicably down. I suppose it's either my body having a joke on me or it's the old wise perspective: just be consistent and eventually it will budge. 'm guessing it's a bit of both. Heh.

Anyway, that's like 4 pounds less than the Sunday weigh-in I mailed to Allan. And it's FINALLY an overall loss after dithering in the low 240s.

Yesterday's caloric intake was 1729 (caloric limit is 1760 for the challenge). My carbs intake was 215. That's ginormous for someone previously lowing lower-carb.

Don't get it. Got on and off that scale a few times to confirm, cause yes, say it with me: Freaky.

I also report my hands have lost weight (maybe the loss is appendage-related). My rings keep flying off in public bathrooms when I go wash my hands. It's a bit worrisome. I remember the last time I weighed close to this and had my ring fall into a public bathroom's trash when I threw the paper in there. So gross to retrieve it. (I don't wear any rings at home, not even wedding band. Hate having jewelry on when I'm at home.)

Now, another nice thing. Ann who is Living Large No More--and is no longer morbidly obese as of today, so go congratulate her-- handed me the HONEST SCRAP AWARD. Yes, scrap, not crap. Hah.  I made a typo! I guess it's cause I didn't fudge about messing up at the French Bistro or feeling emotionally deflated after eating less and not seeing a happy scale number, etc. So, thanks. No point in having a weight loss blog if I'm gonna fib about the fat/eating/setbacks and only share the good stuff, right? Do not lie--not to self and not to others. It never helps!

I would encourage ALL weight loss bloggers NOT TO BS. If you ate too much, say so. If you are having issues, be honest. It's for your good, not just your readers' good. Sometimes, we learn from the flubs as well as the triumphs.

One more Honest Scrap for today: I wish I could say like some other bloggers have that they have totally turned their tastes and desires around. I have not. If you put a big, gooey, hot uber deluxe pizza in front of me right now, I'd want to dive head-first into it and eat it until my pancreas goes on strike and my guts burst. Yes, I will want to. I still want to take a whole candy bar and sit down and go to town.  I have not had a miraculous change of desires. I want to eat my trigger foods and eat a lot of em.

But I have had some flip switched, and I mentioned it many posts back. I've been able to stay on a plan with pretty damn good consistency in a way I have never been able to in 50 years and change of being on this planet. So, clearly, some sort of epiphany hit.

I hope I can say one day as some bloggers do that my tastes and desires are permanently altered.

I suspect I won't. But I hope I will.

Until then, it's just learning to say no. A lot. A LOT.

And yes sometimes. :D

Happy Tuesday. Let's make it one where we win over the food and inertia!

FOOD LOG: calorie goal: no more than 1760; fluid goal: 135 oz

Breakfast:  (hungry, had a big one!)
3/4 cup egg whites with 1/2 cup broccoli slaw and 2 slices 2% cheese
1/2 multigrain bagel with 1 tbsp organic neufchatel and 1 tbsp St. Dalfour orange marmalade
1 cup fresh papaya with lime juice
2 cups coffee and 8 glasses water
calories: 601
fluids:  80 oz

Snack:
Vietnamese Rolls (romaine/carrots/celery innards) with 1/2 tbsp peanut butter and 1 teaspoon chili sauce
plus 1/8th cup Florida Avocado (I added it to the roll innards)
1/2 cup water-n-cinnamon-only oatmeal w/Splenda
2 cups water
calories: 201
fluids: 16 oz

calories so far: 802
fluids so far: 96 oz

Lunch: (felt like something Mexican-ey, and I had some raw organic yummies from Glaser Organic Farms, so I made a vegetarian Mexican organic wrap)
1 whole wheat lavash roll-up filled with:
1/4 cup black beans, 1/4 cup lowfat cheddar, 1/4 cup salsa, 1 tablespoon guacamole, 1 tbsp Fage lowfat Greek yogurt, 1 cup sliced red peppers/Cubanelle peppers
As a treat: 1/2 tbsp peanut butter mixed in a demitasse cup with 2 tsp Nevada Manna sugar-free chocolate chips (like a sugar-free, tastier Reese's cup)
4 glasses water
2 cups decaf

calories: 520
fluids: 48 oz

Dinner:
1 cup Barbara's Peanut Butter Puffins cereal
1/2 cup nonfat milk and 1/2 banana sliced
2 glasses water

calories: 244
fluids: 20 oz


Total Calories: 1566
Total Fluids:  164 oz

Day 7 Spawn of SoDDDY Challenge: Where ground is gained, Pilates is done, Knees ache from Bowling, and Good Mood is Back! Plus food/water log

Tanita-san: 240.4

Pretty much where I was last Friday before The Big Fail and the Friday before. It sucks to be in this holding pattern when I only, only, only had one over-calories day. ONE. I still do not understand that.

So, things are looking down..and up.

Yesterday, I ate fewer than 1300 calories. Not by plan. I simply saved hubby's dessert (homemade sugar-free apple compote over D'Lites low-cal, lower-carb dairy frozen treat) so late--when he wanted it, around 10:30 pm--then had some with him,  that it kept me from being hungry enough to eat my own dinner at a reasonable hour. (He and I are on different hours/rhythms, so when he's having dinner, it's MY lunchtime.)

As it was, I did not sleep my optimal hours (went to bed at 4:30 am, was up at 11 am to have time for breakfast before Pilates). So, I'm hoping to get more snooze tonight, as successful losing, for me, means I gotta sleep loads.

Pilates was great. My breathing is normal. The cool weather is refreshing. My hair looked insanely good (the protein treatment Friday made m y curls CURLIER and my hair shinier and softer). My top was too baggy (bought it 30 pounds ago, and it was really tight back then). My leggings were nicely snug. And I had enough energy to get the job done, although the knees were balking. They got stressed a bit bowling Saturday.

I'm feeling very good mood-wise, but the UTI is making for some lower abdominal achiness. Need to get the culture done this week and get that taken care of. Don't wanna be paining for Christmas.

Isn't it nice on those days when you feel full of vim and are happy and sing while walking around?

Anyway, not much else to report other than it's nice to see the scale go down again and my mood rise and I wanna wrap this up so I can visit blogs, respond to email, get my bloggy award (thanks, Ann!) and then go jump hubby's smexy bones. :D

Food Log:

Breakfast:
1/2 cup scrambled egg whites on top of a slice of Whole Foods whole wheat bread
with 2 slices 2% cheese
1 cup fresh papaya chunks
2 cups coffee
6 glasses water

Lunch: at bagel place
1 scooped and toasted multigrain bagel
3/4 of an egg white frittata with mushrooms and spinach (I asked for minimal oil)
1.33 tbsp whipped cream cheese and 1.33 tbsp Smuckers strawberry jam
2 cups decaf
6 glasses water

Calories for both meals:  891
Fluids so far: 128 oz (need to reach accelerated rate of 135 oz)

Dinner:
1 can Campbell's Healthy Request Select Mexican Chicken Tortilla Soup
with this added: ~1/4 cup kidney beans and ~1/4 cup 2% shredded cheddar
and ~1 can organic Valley Fresh chicken breast (sooo nummy for canned soup)
1.5 cups mango slices/chunks
1/4 Florida avocado (like em better than Calif)
1 mini-pack of coconut Pocky 
2 cups decaf
4 glasses water
calories: 837
fluids:  64 oz

Total Calories: 1729
Total fluids: 192 oz

Day 6 Spawn of SoDDDY Challenge: The Horrendous Weigh-In and BAck to Goal Level Caloric Intake, Cause Clearly, 1200 Calories Raises My Expectations Too Much and My Inner Dieter is Not as Mature As I Thought...But where I got back on the horse fast, unlike years/decades past...

Scale: 242.6

This is a big uptick, and my first challenge no-loss weigh-in. Worse. Gain weigh-in. (But know this: Yesterday, the scale said 243.0. Yes...even more.)

Interestingly, there was only one Eff-Up meal. ONE. Yes. ONE. Let me just copy and paste from my email to Beth of Obesity Strike blog, that eloquent lovely in BritLand, who was kindly concerned about my blogging absence yesterday. (Not due to any major freaking. I had a family event, and I was gone from shortly after getting up to almost 11 pm, by which time I wanted to lie on the couch and have hubby rub my feet while I tried to make up for not drinking enough water.) Here:

Friday night--I had the delayed freak from the weigh-in and ate an insane amount at dinner. Not insane in quantity--was not stuffed at all. Insane cause somehow the French have a way of concentrating calories. 1.5 cup of a creamy soup, a vegetarian entree that was miniscule, but drenched, clearly, in EVOO and butters. And half of my husband's decadent dessert. I'm guessing 2000 cals, once the breadsticks and bean appetizer are factored in. Scary. I really was very upset by that weigh-in and think I went into "fuck it, I'm eating" mode.

But yesterday, I only messed up on not enough water....

We had a very lovely time at a sublime Christmas concert. We had a wee walk on Miracle Mile in Coral Gables in the cool night. Trees with twinkly lights, people having fun, giggling girls, toddler, old couples. Nice. Lots of smooching at a sidewalk French bistro's for me and hubby between bites/slurps. Very charming and romantic.

But, part of my control, yes, I felt it slip. Then a bit more. I started fine (breakfast and lunch were excellent and left me 500 cals for dinner at 1200). Water was too much for my UTI bladder. We had to duck into a fast food restaurant for me to pee half-way through the drive to the venue. (Ugh, traumatic bathroom experience, nasty)  At Miracle Mile, I had walked past the bistro after seeing a really unsuitable limited menu. Very oil/cream/butter rich stuff. But hubby got stabbed in the brain by a sniff of the goodies and the look of his face was control-slip-number-one.

Okay, I said. We sat. (First big mistake.)

I tried to find stuff I wanted and was not bad. Every soup was creamy or cheesy. I asked the waiter which soup would have the least fat/cream. Fine, bring that one....

Every salad was cheesy or meaty or creamy or oily. No salad as I was having the vegetarian entree, anyway. Yes, the only entree that looked like it might suit--the vegetarian one--was what I ordered, though not exactly what I wanted. I did not order dessert or the nice 3-course offerins (soup/entree/dessert) cause then I'd order dessert.

Little by little, I just felt something in my head start blooming. Control slipping. I ordered decaf. Had three cups. Asked for extra glasses of water.

Well, whatever. As described in my email excerpt: diet fail.

Yesterday, I was gone all day. I knew the event (bowling party then home party) would have a trigger food: pizza. I made an egg white scramble with some part-skim mozzarella, fresh basil, chopped tomato and I had a leftover half of a multigrain bagel, scooped out, that I added some of the chopped tomato, some of the 1/4 cup I used of mozzarella, some basil, some garlic, and tried to give myself the diet-pizza vibe without the pizza calories. To satiate my mouth a bit with flavors, so I could resist.

I did. I had NONE Of the two pizzas. I took an apple, two slices reduced cheese and a snack bag of high-fiber, low-cal crackers. That was my lunch, with water and decaf. Good thing, as this bowling alley has NOT ONE diet-friendly item on the menu. NOT ONE. Not one salad. Everything is a diet bomb: burgers, fries, hot dogs, pizza, chicken tenders, nachos.

I bowled 2 hours non-stop (I took two spots on the roster so I kept moving). And I never sat down for 2 hours. My family kept asking me to sit down between turns, and I said, no, burn more calories standing up.  I jumped around. I danced with the kids.

The family then moved to brother's home for the dinner/cake part of the festivities. I pit-stopped at a nearby Japanese place and got vegetable sushi, steamed gyoza, salad and green tea to go. (Hubby got chicken teriyaki and brown rice, so I had the grilled veggies he didn't like: zucchini, onions.)  I had no cake. Instead, 2 strawberries dipped in fat-free whipped cream (niece is dieting, hence the option). Then I picked up a clave and my brother the maracas we had a mini pachanga, singing to Christmas carols to a salsa beat while dancing and making noise. (Family tradition: for Nochebuena, we take bags full of percussion instruments and just jam and dance and make a happy, celebratory noise to salsa tunes.)

Played scrabble. Had ONE chocolate kiss. Went home. Drank coconut water and regular water. Watched anime a bit with hubby. Dozed off on couch.

Today, I finally had a breather to consider Friday's debacle at dinner. I really do think that not seeing any loss after such a controlled eating, lower calorie week hurt me internally more than I had even realized. It really put me close to an all-out binge.

(Believe it or not, those 2000 or so calories was not even CLOSE to a binge. My stomach was not stuffed in the least. It was a small amount of very concentrated fatty calories. The veggie plate was, literally, 1 portabello mushroom cap, 1/4 cup spinach which I shared with hubby, 1 artichoke heart, 1/4 cup wild rice, and one tablespoon each of beet coulis, red pepper coulis, sweet potato whipped, yukon potato whipped with anise or fennel. That's it. I could have held most of it in the palm of my hand. hahahah. It all tasted primo, very nicely done, but miniature servings.)

I'm going back to more "goal weight" level. I can take disappointing losses if I eat that way. If I eat at 1200 and don't get significant drops (2+ pounds) a week, I will freak. I saw a small gain afer eating at an average of about 1300 cals a day. I did not handle it well at all, it seems. I thought I was okay. I was not.

My inner dieter is apparently 13 years old.

242.6

Dang. I don't care that most is bloat. I don't care. I hate that number.

It was hard emailing Allan with a GAIN. (Ugh) So, reset button, fresh week, fresh start.

Onward, with hope and resolve:

Food Log:

Breakfast:
1/2 cup egg whites made into omelette withorganic goodies: 1.5 oz feta, 1 cup chopped tomatoes , 1/2 cup chopped red bell peppers, 1/2 cup strips of Cubanelle peppers, fresh oregano, dried oregano, salt, pepper.
1/2 teaspoon of olive oil that I smeared on non-stick pan
1/2, scooped, multigrain bagel with 1 tbsp organic neufchatel and 2 tsp Dalfour Four Fruits spread
2 cups coffee
6 glasses water
calories: 443
fluids: 64 oz

Day 4 Spawn of SoDDDY Challenge: Where I Scream, Calm down, Enjoy some Hawaiian Mokka Java and Recommend Great Decafs for You Joe-Addicts, look forward to purdy Christmas Music, and Refuse to Let Frustrating Weigh-In Get to Me! ...and food/water log

Aah, Friday.

Hubby and I slept until 10 am. I love waking up and seeing his adorable sleeping face. I hated getting out from under the warm blankies, but I needed to do my poo/weigh-in/breakfast/water and get ready for a hair appt.

Weigh-in you already know. See previous post. Echoes of my holler in Miami probably reached you at a seismic-effect-inducing level.

I'm better now. I had my uber-veggie egg white omelet. Half of the multigrain bagel (w lowfat cheese), the one I bought Wednesday when I had a breakfast-out at the bagel place. Saved it in a Ziploc in the fridge and it toasted up fine, though Allan will attest to the fact that any bagel is best early in the morning when it's just out, all warm and nummsy.

Sipping my second cup of Hawaiian mokka java (it's actually intended for espresso, but I like it in my drip Technivorm. It's dark and good. If you love good coffee, visit Paradise Roasters or George Howell's Terroir coffee. Amazing beans from those places. Amazing. My fave coffee is a great Ethiopian Yirgacheffe. I used to prefer the Terroir Ademe Bedane full flavor roast, but they stopped having it. I called. No more. Made me wanna cry. Both roasters have excellent Ethiopian, Brazilian, Guatemalan, and Sumatran coffees (those are my fave regions for coffee, in descending order. My fave roast is medium. My fave flavor profile is chocolatey/nutty or chocolatey/fruity, but I can go for chocolatey/spicey. Yes, you see a trend, right?)

I never used to like decaf. Then I tried GOOD decaf beans, and I was impressed. Then I tried the Costa Rican decaf Terroir is carrying in its GHH Select line, and I swooned. It has the sweet chocolate/nutty profile I adore. I actually have to check the bag at times, cause I find it hard to believe it's a decaf. Nice rounded cup, not the flat taste effect that is either subtle-to-prominent in decafs. The Paradise Roaster decafs have been very nice, but man, that Costa Rican one rocks my mouth!

Back to my mokka java: I made it strong to wake myself up. This is my first day getting up before 10:45 am in a while. :D Last week, I had several up after 4pm days (I am a vampire, really.)

I have calmed down considerably since post one (previous).

Allan sent out his encouragement emails. He cracks me up. The man is nothing if not passionate. I like that. I like people with that sort of intensity and energy. It wakes you up the way a good mokka java will. :)

Anyway, hair appt got postponed to 2:30, so I can chill with my coffee and water and messy hair. I'll go pick out what to wear to stay warm enough during the concert tonight. Maybe think about whether we'll hit a Coral Gables eatery afterwards (if concert runs 90 mins, we should be out by 9-ish, which is okay for dining). Hope it's a lovely day....and the echoes of my frustrated scream fade completely to make room for beautiful chorale music.


Food Log:

Breakfast:
1 cup chopped mushrooms, zucchini, yellow and red peppers egg white omelette (no oil)
1/2 multigrain bagel with 1 slice 2% cheese and a smallish tomato sliced.
3 cups coffee
6 glasses water (2 before, 2 during, 2 after)
calories: 324
fluids: 72 oz


Lunch: keeping fluids low-ish, cause I don't wanna be running to the bathroom every 30 mins during the concert. Had to go THREE times at the beauty salon. Pish.

1 cup vegetarian split pea soup
2 Canadian bacon slices, chopped and added to soup
2/3 cup mashed instant potatoes
1/2 small banana, sliced, with 1 tsp sugar-free chocolate chips, nuked till hot, fat free whip cream dollop (very small but delish impromptu dessert for you all who like chocolate/banana combo, with fat free RediWhip for 67 cals)
2 cups decaf
4 glasses water
calories: 377
fluids: 48 oz

Calories So Far:  711
Fluids So Far:  120 (almost there)

.

Face the Truth Fridays: My Body Must Be Effed Up! How Can I have the lowest eating week of my adult life and weigh MORE?

Scale = 240.8

Yes, that's + 1/5th of a pound from last Friday's weigh-in.

You would not like the expression on my face right now.

And yet--and I'm am NOT bee-essing you here--this has probably been the lowest eating (calorically) week of my adult life. So much so that I have been in wonder that I haven't gone all binge-nuts.

I have taken time out of every day--usually right after a meal when possible--to log every bite and drink. When at home, I measure/weigh. When it's a a restaurant, I deconstruct, and then add a bit extra in case I deconstructed "off". I look up restaurant sites for caloric info. I've had to wrestle myself down during some cravings.

I've been a ridiculously good girl, better than at any other week in my adult life, calorie-wise. I ate more the week I had an appendectomy had had one NO FOOD DAY, seriously!

Anyway....

Lookee:

12/09 = 1480
12/08 =  1297
12/07 = 1247
12/06 = 1208
12/05 = 1039
12/04 = 1469
12/03 = 1117

Add in two sessions with my personal trainer (meaning hard work and very sore 24 hours later).

How can I be eating THIS LITTLE and busted my Pilates ass at least twice and not have at least a 1.5 to 2 pound loss?

The carb/extra fruit factor? Maybe. I've gone out of my way to add more grains and fruit than I have been since May.  My thyroid is doing something weird? Maybe. Does a possible UTI do this? Who knows. (Got a call from doc yesterday that I had bacteria in my urinalysis and she wants a culture. Fine. Maybe the pain down there isn't all the Pilates lower abdominal work....)  Or is this the dreaded PLATEAU? (I have been losing since June, so...)

Honestly, it's making me a wee bit nuts today. First day I'm truly frustrated on this eating plan. I don't expect mega-losses. I do expect what I've had even eating 1700 calories--about a pound or a bit more a week.

The Truth I'm Facing: This week the math isn't working. Other factors--maybe not all accounted for--are at play. But definitely, this is one of the freaking-factor weeks. Eating less. Measuring. Weighing. Drinking Water. NOT moving less. Gaining.

Eff that crap!

I will persist. But I'm pissed at my body today. I may have to slap my own face. :P  If it wouldn't scare the neighbors, I'd go outside and holler. Instead, I'll yell internally and get it out of my system.

Okay, vented. Got that out. Time to drink water, eat breakfast, and not let any damn thing--not even an anti-Math week--get me down.

Day 3 Spawn of SoDDD Challenge: Finally a wee drop, shivering in Miami AM, ready for Pilates, and need to get more fiber!

Tanita-san said good morning with this: 240.2

Okay, minor drop given my caloric intake. :) But a drop.

It's chilly for Miami. I a nudie-sleeper have had to sleep with two t-shirts the last three nights. Hubby has gone to bed wearing three layers, including a hoodie--with the hood UP--and sheets, blankets on top. We can't (and won't) put the heat on cause I fear it might spur allergies. We have never used the heater in any place we've lived, not in 27 years. Not starting now.

I like not sweating. Yay.

Got Pilates in an hour, so I gotta shower and dress and make sure my feet are in pumice-happy shape (hey, when you get your body bits close to a trainer's face, you make sure you are sparkly sweet-clean and feet are smooth).

This morning, I had a micro-poop. Pathetic. Checked SparkPeople tracker and I only had 16 grams of fiber yesterday. WHAT? I'm the queen of fiber. I've had days of 60+ fiber regularly this past year. I better watch that. With fewer calories, I can't get lazy. Hubby wants pasta tonight, and I have a high fiber pasta (18 grams of fiber per serving!) Yeah, tomorrow, poopy blast-off!

Tomorrow hubby gets hair trimmed, I get a protein treatment, so we can both look purdy for the Seraphic Fire Christmas Concert in Coral Gables.

So, another Spawny day. Water, lower calories, movement....and as Allan says, "patience."

FOOD LOG:

Breakfast:
1/2 multigrain bagel with WW cream cheese spread and 1 tsp sugar-free apricot preserves
3 slices Jones' Canadian bacon
fiber supplement, B-complex 
2 cups coffee
8 glasses water

calories: 305
fluids: 80 oz

Lunch:
Subway Meatball Salad (all veggies except pickles/banana peppers, mozzarella shredded on top)
2 cups decaf
6 glasses water

calories so far: 635
fluids so far: 144

Dinner: made at home so I could get my fruits/veggies in (& fiber! )
1.5 servings FiberGourmet spaghetti with
1.34 cups veggies (cooked with water) and 2 tbsp fresh ripped up basil
1/4 cup mozzarella and 2 tbsp shredded parmesan
1/2 cup Rao's Marinara sauce
1 cup watermelon
6 BariWise mini biscotti (sugar-free)
2.5 cups decaf
8 glasses water

dinner calories: 589
dinner fluids: 84 oz

Got hungry, had a snack. Bye-bye 1200 level:
1.4 cups Cheerios
1/2 small banana and 1/3 cup fresh blueberries
1/2 cup nonfat milk
calories:256


Total Calories: 1480
Total Fluids: 228 oz

Day 2 of Spawn of SoDDD Challenge: Running Around, Tempted at Bagel place (but persevered), Haircut, Blood Drawn, and Body is in Stall Mode, Methinks!

Okay, first time today I can sit down and BLOG!

No weigh-in. I slept little and poorly and didn't want the bad news. But my body feels a bit bloaty (not enough fruit yesterday?)  I hope Friday's official weigh-in is not disappointing. I'd be pissed, considering I ate about 1200 calories each of the last two days, which is REALLY REALLY REALLY low for me. I have been in a semi-stall, despite water and great caloric intake. Happens. I have been losing for months and this is normal for me...a sort of "hiccup". I'll get past it. I'll lose more.

Today, I had blood drawn for two docs--my endo and my primary. And pee. I had fasted 12 hours and had not had much water (cause I didn't wanna pee my pants during the drive). Then they ask for pee. I'm like, "Oh, no. Should have had more water."  Got out maybe 1/4 cup's worth. No kidding. I laughed. I asked, "Is that enough?" She said, "Yeah." Good. There was no more.

Bought 3 bottles of water at the gas station (insane prices, but I needed the agua after not having any) and drank two as I drove to the stripmall with the bagel place to have breakfast. God, was I tempted to go omelettey nuts (like ham, bacon, pastrami, cheese, veggies). I drank more water and asked for coffee to get more fluids in me. Then calmly asked for the egg white frittata with mushrooms, spinach and onions, and asked for it to be cooked with minimal oil. Got the grits side (this place stores the tomatoes with the lox and nova and stuff, and they always taste fishy, so no tomato slices for me). Multi-grain bagel came with it--I asked for it scooped, toasted. No low-fat cream cheese. I decided to splurge and use sparingly of the real thing. I had half the bagel--brought the other half home, weighed it, 1.2 onces. So I guess their bagels run 2.4 or so ounces scooped. The frittata when it came really was non-greasy. The mushrooms and spinach were fresh, not frozen or canned (some of the spinach leaves were still partly intact, not a soggy mess), and I asked for the onions raw so they wouldn't grill em with grease.

The grits, sadly, were "margarined". I saw little blobs of yellow here and there.

I had all the frittata (not enormous) and 1/4 to 1/3 cup of the grits (I logged it as 1/3 and added 1 tsp of margarine to be safe to the log). 2.5 cups coffee. The 1/2 scooped bagel and 1 tsp of cream cheese and 2 tsp of orange marmalade. I added 2/3 of a tbsp of margarine to the log to cover what little fat they used for the frittata. Maybe that was optimistic, but there it is. My estimate.

I cannot begin to tell you how much I wanted to finish the cup o' grits and other bagel half. OMIGOSH, I just drank water and said, 'No." Drank water and said, "No!" Pushed the plate away and asked for a doggy bag.

Princess Curls--just done, still damp

SparkPeople's tracker says I had 434 calories. Well, I was still ready to eat a lot more, but didn't. After a while, I calmed down. I went to GNC and got multivitamins. Went as a walk-in to a nearby salon and got my hair trimmed. Can't eat while getting hair cut. Well, I can't. Felt better when my curls were in order. The water and food kicked in. It's now 5 hours later and I'm ready to have something. :)

<off to eat>

<back>

Okay, so hubby (who had dental work) wanted something not very chewy and went to Boston Market. I measured out one of the meatloaf bits (4.3 oz), went to the BM website and calculated the calories per ounce for their meatloaf (64) and multiplied accordingly. I had two steamed veggie sides. No cornbread. I made a big batch of mushrooms sauted in 1/4 cup lowfat mushroom gravy and put that under the meatloaf slice. 2 cups decaf. Wanted dessert. Had some D'Lites low-cal, lower carb chocolate dairy treat and chopped a banana onto it. 5 glasses of water (still sipping coffee and water), and plan to have 3 more to be done with that meal.

Calories for breakfast and lunch: 1084
Fluids so far: 140 (accelerated rate level exceeded)

Okay, got super hungry around 10:30pm. Heated up the half-scooped-out-bagel remnant from breakfast and toasted it with one slice 2% cheese and made a cup of WS protein hot chocolate. Water. Done for the day (though I really am wanting to eat more).

My body and mouth are REALLY noticing the drop in calories. I hope I can persist, but at 1600-1760, I was not particularly hungry. Often didn't use up all my calories. I woke up with a growling stomach Wed AM. I'm going to bed feeling a little "tummy-void". I've been experimenting with the lower caloric rate, and I am not done with the experimenting, but I'm up to 1300 today and still feeling unsatisfied.

My choices could be more filling/better, so let's see as this goes on :)

Total Calories: 1297
Total Fluids: 176 oz

Day 1 of the SPAWN of SoDDD Challenge: Can the Princess Dieter convince Princess Wuss to do the 1200 Calories? The Battle's On! And some thoughts on eating at goal weight level and the upcoming holiday temptations...

Scale: 240.4

The Spawn of the Son of the Double Dog Dare Challenge begins TODAY!

If you didn't join in, too bad for you. The info and packet with menus is OUTSTANDING. Allan and crew did a great job. Thanks to all who put that together.

This is a short and disciplined challenge. The goal (at the strict end) is to eat 1200 calories and NO MORE plus a set number of ounces of fluids per day. The fluids are becoming second nature to me. I haven't missed the fluids goal a single day. In the previous two challenges, I think I only went over caloric goals three days, and I made up for all those and then some by eating less other days. So, really, I've been pretty damn golden since this series of challenges began. Even ill, I didn't overeat. Even on Thanksgiving, I didn't overeat.

This is the longest period of consistent sane eating that I've done...EVER...since I chubbed up in my twenties. I'm fifty. Do the math.

If you want to see how sticking to goal-weight caloric level and drinking oodles of water does a dieter good, go see Allan's charts today at http://almostgastricbypass.blogspot.com and marvel. Goal weight caloric level is not starvation level. It is a disciplined level--you will have to plan, think, control, and not overindulge, but that's what it's gonna take to MAINTAIN a weight loss, especially a massive one from hyperconditioned overeaters such as I am.  If you can't eat day in and day out at  your GOAL WEIGHT CALORIC LIMIT level, you will NOT BE ABLE TO MAINTAIN A LOSS. Period.

So, if living at this level was burdensome and un-doable, I would have had to reconsider my goal weight. Who knows? I may have to reconsider it anyway due to other factors. Or maybe I'll be one of the lucky few who can even go lower than goal weight. Doubt it. I've never skewed slim, not even as an active teen. My teen weight was in the 130's to low 140's, and that was biking, swimming, and walking a lot with a normal thyroid and being too poor to indulge in restaurants like I did as an adult (and do).

I have learned that I can enjoy many nice meals at 1700 calories. I can have filling and delicious meals. Not as much as I want every time. Not everything I want every day. Not a lot of my fave indulgences. Very little dessert. But that's how it is. People don't stay normal weight glomming on pizzas and cheese-drenched mega-burritos thrice a week and shoving cake and chocolate bars down the gullet every night. People stay normal weight, stay slender, stay lean by eating with constraints . And if like me you are a metabolic disaster, you don't get to fudge as much as some others. Life is unfair, then you die. (Okay, so I have the hope of  Heaven, which blunts the awfulness of that, heh.) So what's new? I assume God gave me a great brain, a caring family, and a dazzlingly loving and passionate and monogamously devoted hunk of a hubby to make up for a defective respiratory system, weak teeth, acne, eczema, depression tendencies, a crap immune system, and a screwed-up metabolism. Hubby says so. :D

So, when I eat with my Great Big True Hunky Love, I don't get second and third helpings. I guess I'll just have more sex.

Now, back to food:

I have not fully committed to the 1200 level. I am committed to not going over my goal weight level, and even to staying nicely under.

But I did test the waters. Yesterday, I had the first day that was really close to the DNA test diet recommendations for me (65/20/15)My carb/fat/protein ratio was  63/15/22. I also ate only 1208 calories. I was not hungry. I did have cravings. I almost had another mini-meal cause of those cravings. But I persevered.

It wasn't a lot of food, but it wasn't as bad as I expected. I think because I had a lot of fiber (36 grams) that helped make me feel full.

So, for me, this is an ambivalent beginning, but I am determined to continue to the end, no matter where in the acceptable caloric range I end up daily. Christmas will be a challenge, moreso than Thanksgiving for me. Christmas has emotional connotations and is so saturated in nostalgia that it may trigger the emotional monster. I will do what I need to do to calm the grief-monster that emerges, too, since my parents and beloved aunt are deceased. I always miss the gone-folks most at Nochebuena (Christmas Eve, when we Cubans celebrate the holiday). Dad and my brother watching over the roast pig is a memory. Mom making empanadillas from scratch. My aunt always stirring something in some big pot. Singing Spanish carols that were my mom's fave. Stories of "old Cuba" from parents and siblings. (I have no memories, so I always felt a big hole, a bit left out, but I'd sit and listen to the reminiscences.)

If I can get through Nochebuena, I'll be fine. :)

So, onto the SPAWN CHALLENGE:

Food Log...

BREAKFAST:
2 slices WW toast made into a sandwich with:
1/3 cup egg whites scrambled with 1/4 cup chopped tomato/onion/bell pepper and
1 slice 2% American cheese
3 slices Canadian bacon
1 cup fresh papaya chunkes with spritz of lime.
Supplements: Calcium +D, Magnesium, Quercetin, Fiber, Multi, probiotics
3 cups coffee
8 glasses water (6 before, two after)

calories:  333
fluids:  88 oz

LUNCH:
2 cups Amy's light in sodium Minestrone Soup
1 tbsp shaved parmesan
3 skewers Satay Chicken with 1 tbsp peanut sauce
2 cups decaf
6 glasses water

calories:  517
fluids: 64 oz (not counting soup)


calories so far: 850
fluids so far:  152 oz

DINNER: Was craving both SWEET and SALTY and arugula...so the weird dinner you see:

Arugula and tomato salad with 2 tbsp shaved parmesan and 2 tsp EVOO
WS hotcakes with sugar free syrup, 1 tsp ICBInotButter , 2 tbsp applesauce, and cinnamon
assorted supplements
2 cups decaf
4 glasses water

calories:  397
fluids: 48 oz

Total Calories: 1247
Total Fluids:  200 oz