Not Day 33 of P4 Challenge: Appt with Dietitian, The Change of Mindset She Noticed and I Notice, Chat with Waitress, Bright COLORFUL Top and Lipstick, Happy Curls....and date night's a coming!

Today's weigh-in at home was 225.2. At the R.D.'s: 225.0

I had lost 4.5 lbs since my appt with her 2 weeks ago. That's par for me. At 1200 calories (sometimes less, not often a bit more), I lose 2 lbs a week, maybe 2 and a scosh if I have a lot of under days in that week. I know others at that caloric range with regular exercise lose faster, but that's how my wonky, hypothyroidic, insulin-resisstant body rolls.

And 2 lbs a week is great. It means I can lose 100 in a year at that rate. And I don't need to lose 100 anymore. I realized this lately as I still get email from the Blog to Lose group for those needing to lose 100+ lbs. I'm not longer one seeking that kind of loss, not after a 74 lb loss. I want to get to 160--more or less, I'm not like fanatical on the number, it's just a goal right now, and it's not even a skinny goal--and that's 65.2 lbs away. I have less to lose than I have lost. I like that asymmetry. My brain says: "If you can lose 74, you can lose 65."

The dietitian was thrilled. Lost 1% of fat in those two weeks. My motivation is still high. She says I am inspiring ad she asked me if I'd consider being a motivational speaker at one of the dietitian conferences. I said if local, sure. :) She said I ought to write a book. I said, "Well, I need to get to goal and stay there for a while before I can do that. I don't want to be one of those folks who loses a bunch of weight, gets a book contract, writes it, releases it, and then regains a bunch of weight." I've been reading blogs and books about MAINTAINING weight loss s (not that there are that many books, mind you. But there are blogs of successful maintainers.

There is no fricken point in losing the weight if you can't keep it off, I figure. So, I started trying to get into the brain/habits/journey of maintainers last summer. I realize that "dieting" doesn't end. Maintaining is like being on a lifelong diet. If I can't tolerate eating, say, 1400 or 1500 calories for life, there is no point. None. Might as well stay fat. Because to lose it just to regain would depress me no end.

I look at the 1200 plan as a sort of bootcamp. If I can do 1200 and learn to be satisfied with this much less, learn the tricks of assuaging appetite and dealing with cravings and saying no to seconds, and portion control, then going up to 1400 or 1600 will seem like heaven. It's another snack or a bigger dinner.  I've done several 1000 calorie and 900 calorie days without much hunger. I think of it as training for a life of eating much less than my obese, out of control self wants to. I have read and researched as if I was getting yet another college degree. I want epiphany after epiphany.

Is it easy. Hell no. Just getting into regular exercise (which I started to do in June of 2008) has been enlightening. I still don't WANT to get up and exercise. I do know that I feel so immensely better when I do, and I like the muscles under the skin, that it's a matter of reward. Heck, if I were rich, I'd have a trainer come six days a week and run me through an hour to an hour and a half of serious work-outing. :) But I don't have that moolah. I'd do it, though. The rewards are tangible.  Want multiple orgasms? Get that pelvic floor work done in Pilates. Your G spot will go insane. I kid you not. :D That's ONE benefit. Just one.

So, I'm not the gung-ho lemme do sit ups kind of gal. I am the "Okay, this sucks, but you know you'll feel better when it's done. You'll feel like a champ. So do it!"  I may take an hour or two to talk myself into it, but I'm learning to that more times a week, and that's all it takes. Consistency and lifelong adherence Like dieting: It's for life if you've been obese. For life. Or it comes back.

I don't want to waste this effort. I'm terrified of going back. So, I tell myself--this is it. Can you eat thi way for life? And I say:"I'm going to. That's it. I'm going to."

Resolution doesn't come easy for me, but if there isn't commitment, there's failure. I'm smart enough to know that there's no magic. It's just deciding there is no other option. Do it. Stay fat. Do it. Stay fat. Only choices.

I've had two folks this week tell me I should go on Dr. Oz or "TV" and I say, "Well, lots of weight loss stories out there. I'm not at goal and I haven't maintained. So, why should I go on tv. I want to see people who kept it off 5 years, 10 years, 15 years, not the person who just lost it last week."

When I maintain: Then I can boast. When I've maintained: Then I get my reward trip to Tuscany. :D

If I don't have to spend the moolah tucking the tummy. Weeeeeellllll.....

Anyway, had a spinach and mushroom egg white frittta, minimal oil, as per my request, lowfat swiss, coffee, a couple tablespoons of grits for flabor, then set it aside, as I don't need to starch it up. The waitress and I got talking. She lost 82 lbs, regained a bunch, is out to lose again. We sort of commisserated about our stress-emo-eating tendencies. Chatted about food, healthier eating. Was nice to know another journey-sharer. She made sure my omelette was as dry of oil as possible--a dieting waitress knows the score. :) Lots of spinach. Yum.

I'm wearing more color these days. At 299 pounds, at 279, 250, you still wanna hide. I'm still severely obese, but I feel confident enough to want to wear color. Today, a magenta top and magenta lipstick and very perky happy curls. I felt cute. :D Middle-aged, fat, cute. :D

Which is good as hubby will be home soon and it's off to our date night. I intend to get lotsa smooching and laughing done.

I already called that restaurant with the amazing grilled romaine (with balsamic). If the show ends early enough, we'll hit it for a late supper. I'm skipping a full lunch and just doing fruit and protein snack to cover me until we're able to dine. Water, decaf, small snack....and then tell the stomach to shut the F up until I have time to feed it. :D

Anyway, yesterday I ended at well under 1200 calories, exercises as already posted, and my mood is...GREAT. I've been singing in the car, at CVS, in the restaurant, in the parking lot.

Phase 5 is almost here. Remember to send your weigh-ins to Allan. I'm sending mine tomorrow so I don't forget or sleep late and miss it Sunday. I want us to really shine and do well--all of us--and be healthier and happier and have great Big Os and walk without pain and huffing and puffing and go up stairs without dying from being unfit and all the other good things that come from eating properly and moving soundly.

Let's be well together!!!!!

Later...I gotta iron something pretty for date night.

Not Day 32 of Challenge: The walk interruption, the calm again appetite, the beautifully warm day...and a fun outing for tomorrow...

Yesterday, I didn't do a lick of exercise, well, other than a wee bit of dancing and whoopsie. Stayed under 1200 cals. Drank my water.

Today, have had fewer than 600, so have plenty for supper and maybe a snack, too. I like doing the evening yogurt/fruit/nut thing. Seems to have a nice effect on my sleep. Did not have the "crazy and wanna eat" feeling last evening. None of that today, either. I did have a craving for buttered toast, but I swatted that aside.

Also today: Pilates session, walking.

The walking got interrupted. My left foot went numb way earlier than usual and I had to slow down. A lady I wave to snagged me for an intro and convo. Nice lady with a cool Mi-Mo home (think fifties, stone work, Lloyd-Wright influence, nice woodwork). She liked me enough after a 40 minute chat that she showed me inside her house. I love Mi-Mo homes, so no problemo. She was a widow and I guess needed some human company. Friendly. Nice. Good to know someone on my walking route, too, for safety's sake. And she's usually outside puttering when I walk, hence the "waving" habit.

Resumed walk when it was dark, with beautiful sky and dark trees.

A little hungry, not much. I've hit the water enough that it keeps the stomach un-grumbly.

Today was warm. I wanted some of the cold from the North, but we got a/c weather until near sundown, when temp and breezes were great for the walk.

Tomorrow, we go see a live show of WAIT, WAIT, DON"T TELL ME (which I mentioned before is my fave NPR show). Hubby got tickets. I have no idea what to wear. It's at the opera house (and that makes me think dress up some), but it's a comedy live show (which makes me think "jeans"). Oh, well. It will be my first time at the new complex downtown for music/dance/performances. Kinda excited. If it doesn't let out too late, maybe we can hit a MiMo restaurant for supper. Not sure. Better have a snack before we go. And not too much water. I don't wanna get up every 25 mins to pee. Pity we couldn't see the Thursday one, since that has Mo Rocca, my fave panelist! BUT.Friday's has Dave Barry, and he cracks me up. So, it's all good, right?

Oh, just remembered. Have an appointment with the R.D. tomorrow. Oops...better plan out the day...I may need to go buy undies for the night out. Don't wanna be a saggy bottom gal.

Later, peops. Be healthier by a bit today...

Phase 4 Cancelled, so..um, is it still day 31? hah Uncertainly about challenge status for moi...but the scale moved. Yay!

Yesterday, Allan called off Phase 4. It was pretty shocking to a lot of us, so, well, the air was a tad in the "bummed out" zone, if you read the comments on his blog.

Today, he announced a new phase starting Monday. He wants adherence and those who won't adhere to take a hike.

I emailed him that I wanted in. I expect it to continue to be tough...but worth it. :)

On to the scale:

Tanita-san says: 225.6

Wow. Fewer than 10 lbs to be out of the "severely obese" category. I'm so stoked to see 216. I want to get there................NOW!!!! hahah

Anyway. Was still feeling the munchies evening time and it was hard, hard, hard to say no last night. But....the scale shows the battle was worth it.

I was hoping we'd get some of that cold you guys are getting all over the more northernly/westernly places. I don't like to hear my a/c running or feel "warm". I wanted more chilly days!

It's Groundhog Day...and I wonder what Phil says about winter. ; )

I hope he says Miami will get a bunch more cold fronts!

I feel really boring today, so maybe I'll cut this short. This is Valentines and Birthday month, so I got some planning to do. I want to celebrate well and STAY IN MY CALORIES and eat healthfully and move and see at least 8 pounds gone by month's end.

It's a short month, but I want to see it shine, shine, shine for me!

Happy Wednesday...be well....

Day 30 of Phase 4 Challenge: Where I'm back after just not feeling the blogging mojo, where salt is siren calling, where I distract myself with hot J-Rock , and where I offer pics of my weekend outings and my body at 226!!

Tanita-san: 226.2

A bit of stasis.

I've been hitting the salty foods a lot since Saturday evening, and it always has this effect. Affects the scale. Affects appetite: yeah, it does. Don't know about you, but when I have multiple salty things, I get HUNGRIER, so it's time to ease back and fast. I was VERY VERY VERY hungry last night, and I didn't like that at all. It was hard to say no. I was in a fight for hours with my appetite.

Yesterday:
Calories: 1273
Exercise: Pilates with trainer, walking (25 mins)
Mood: still lethargic, energy a bit low
Hunger:Crazy later in the day (but higher than last week all weekend)

I am not happy that the appetite is back, but I'll hit the decaf tea and coffee and keep the tummy warm and filled as best I can until the low appetite returns.

Energy was great Saturday and Sunday for parts of the day (low on others), but yesterday I woke up feeling like I needed more sleep. (And I have been sleeping more, 10 and 12 hours sometimes). Usually I'd think thyroid...but I'm pretty sure it's not that. We'll see.

Today, I woke up after sleeping 11 hours, and I'm mellow. Hunger has been quieter. Don't feel like exercising....but I'll do something. Will force myself.

I've had to distract my appetite. Here's one example of a distraction:



If you like anime, you may recognize the song as the opening theme for TRINITY BLOOD. It's one of my fave J-Rock tunes, originally released 1993 by Buck-Tick, whose lead singer, Sakarai Atsushi is one of the most beautiful J-Rockers ever, and he's not young anymore in this video. The band began in the early 80s. This is actually footage from an Abingdon Boys School concert, one of my fave JRock bands, and Takanori (lead singer) has a great voice. But no one sings "Doresu"(DRESS) like Sakurai-san. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.  Love this performance. Gave me chills!

If ya wanna see a nice performance when he was younger and had the long, flowing, black, silky hair ....here ya go.   So beautiful. Makes me woozy.

The weekend was great, btw. Hubby and I had a date night both evenings, Saturday  in Coral Gables. Since I needed to get in a walk--well, I had done more than my minimum 4 days walking, but wanted to do more--so we walked 30 minutes (we both wore sneakers, so it was fine) before choosing an outdoor cafe for supper.

Sunday, we went to Bayside at the MiaMarina, took a night sightseeing cruise (it was soo nice and cool), danced to a live band at the bayfront, then had supper at Hard Rock Cafe. I appreciated the waitress being so nice about my specs--you know the drill if you low-carb or diet: little to no oil, dressing on side, no tortillas, etc. Lots of decaf and water. We walked a lot there, too, as parking was at the other end from where Hard Rock. Probably 20 mins of walking.

Interesting personal note: Where HRC is now used to be, in the early 80s, an upscale eatery called Reflections on the Bay. Hubby and I got engaged there in '82. We told the hostess and she got us a table at windowside (the only one!) and we had a view of the bay a bit different (Bayside wasn't the bustling tourist/nightlife place it is now) from our younger dating days. But it was romantic all the same. Reflections on the Bay had large windows all with views out to the water....so nice.... Gosh, time flies....

Pics: First one, with very unflattering lighting, eesh, is a couple feet from where we sat outdoors for dinner with Coral Gables city hall lit up prettily behind me. We had a nice view of the sky, city hall, the one end of Miracle Mile with posh shops and lovely lights in the trees. It was damp and cool, but not unplesantly so.

One of Jimi Hendrix's surviving guitars (I guess a lot of them got immolated or shattered, hah.) Hard Rock Cafe on Sunday, natch:

I took body shots today, caue though the scale is the same as Friday, I "felt" different in the torso:

Hubby said to me on our date Sunday that he didn't think I looked as big as "226" lbs. Well, folks don't go around saying how much they weight to me to compare, but this is 226 on me. I wear 2x, some generous 1x, 20 and 22 sizes, and I've noticed some folks who weigh a lot more than me wear smaller sizes. So, you never know. Build matters.

Now to google if Genmaicha has carbs...cause I like it's grainy flavor. I like it enough to drink unsweetened, which is great. The box says no, but man, it really tastes like nuttry-grain. Mmm.

Off I go to resist the Demon of Sodium....

Happy Tuesday. Make it count for health!