I finally hit new low ground after my freaky week: 189.4
Nice new territory. Haven't been here since, oh, 1991 or 1990.
I had a Japanese food craving, so I got some vegetable sushi. I had a plumcot and some cherries, too. And...my bad...steamed gyoza. Totally not primal or lower carb. Pffft.
Today, with one meal to go, I have 550 to 750 calories left, depending on if I go to 1200 or 1400. Between the soy sauce and rice and--drat me--dumplings, I might bloat again. If they're rice dumplings, I'm fine. If they're wheat flour, there's a price to pay (inflammatorily). I'll see how my joints feel come morning. Gyoza used to be a weekly treat for me. Now, maybe once every 3 or 4 months. Sometimes, you just get the call for a particular thing. Fortunately, these were tiny and had minicule amounts of meat. Hooray.
Or I may not. The body is weird. Who knows.
But I didn't get the BIG sleepies after, just some mellowness, which is a good sign that I'm less insulin resistant. Dinner will likely be protein plus salad fixings and fruit and decaf and water. I got some honeydew, and if it's sweet, that's dessert.
Water/fluids is fine. Had a great Pilates session. I could feel longer, leaner, stronger. Some days are just good. Breathing was not an impediment.
Had a 25 minute walk in the cloudy-post-rain coolness.
I was thinking as I ate my Japanese food today how I used to eat 3 and 4 and 5 times what I had today. I'd have fried rolls dipped in spicy mayo, salad with miso or ginger dressing, teriyaki, maybe tempura veggies, too, maybe some sushi, a cup + of rice, banana tempura. Now, I get a few pieces of veggie rolls or sushi, usually get some yakitori for protein, drink tea, have a small salad, call it a day. I saved today's salad. Maybe have with dinner or tomorrow.
Some days, when I want to eat more, I use the "It's not an option" phrase. Today, when I wanted more, I told myself another mantra of mine: "You can have it later. Or you can have it tomorrow. Just not right now."
I said it a few times, and eventually, the "full" signal gets to me and I don't need it. I only need it for those few minutes before all the food and stomach stretching from fluids/food sends the "you're done eating' signals. I guess I ate a bit fast or the rice and dumplings made the glucose/insulin thing go wackier than I'm accustomed (as I don't have starches every day) so the stop-eating signals didn't come as fast as they do on a lower carb/no starches (ie, usual) eating mode.
Sometimes, all you need to do is remember the next meal is not that far away.
When I binged, the feeling was, "I have to eat it now. It's hot now. It's fresh now. I want it now. NOW."
If at those "I want more" moments, I can just get in the mindset that takes the appetite into account and says, "Yes, you can have more. Next meal. Next snack. Next Day"...then I"m gonna be okay. It's not a flat no. Just a "later". For binge-ers, knowing there is a later for more food can be very calming when food is calling a little or a whole lot.
So, if food is calling....tell it: "Sure. Later. Not now. I'm done for now."
Have a pleasant evening.