Trials with a New Doc and Less Levoxyl

I've noticed that since my Levoxyl was reduced last month, my mood is dipping, my energy is dipping, the hours I sleep are increasing, my face is feeling heavier, my appetite is up, my weight is up.

Now, there may not be a one-to-one correlation. I was also very sick with a viral respiratory infection, and that can take a toll. Up to now, I've blamed it on the virus, which knocked down my WBC count.

But I'm thinking this new doc may have made a mistake reducing my Levoxyl. I was only half a point out of range (into hyper). I was sleeping normally even at that reading. Now, prior to my weight loss, I was often TSH-range stable for a year plus. Since losing a lot of weight, even maintaining the loss a year and a half, my TSH rambles.

It got so bad a year ago, I had gout-like joint pain in my toes and arthritis-like pain all over my body. It was AWFUL.

But then it was hard to fine-tune. I take two meds, Cytomel and Levoxyl, and we've tried tweaking both. I either stay too high in TSH (hypo) for me to feel good or go too low in number (hyper) for the doc to like. And yes, when I was really hyper in June last year, having palpitations and night sweats and anxiety, that sucked. Though getting to 169.8 was pretty nice. It's not the way to do it, risking heart issues.

ANYWAY...It feels like I'm not optimal. Now. Not horrible like last year, but just a bit off. I wake up feeling sleepy. I drowse off on the sofa at 9pm (when I wasn't falling asleep on the sofa since the last time I was out of range, thyroid-wise.)

I didn't think I could get to a bad TSH number so soon (one month), but we'll see. It's vexing that I can't stay in my sweet spot, but we just gotta keep working on it. But right now, I suspect this gal is out of her best zone.

Sucks.

We press on.

Be well...

Terrific Quote From a Smart Blogger, organic share pick-up day--and a coop recommendation for South Florida peops--plus assorted pics from Saturday's "Dali Miami" outing (and a flashback to the Goya outing in 2007 for comparison), and sort of not "there" yet where I need to be on "get recommitted" week...but I will get there...

I've been sluggish and dozey. I think I need to go through this quieter time, which means fewer blog comments from me, sorry. I need this introspection right now. Untangling knots, as it were (you'll see when you read the quote).

I like energetic and UP better. But quieter, pondering, prayerful is needful some weeks.

I have to shower and get dressed to get my organic goodies, and I'm sitting here unshowered and sort of dragging my feet about cleaning up. How pathetic, right? Well, I know that I'll feel better when everything is clean and sweet-smelling. :D I have to remember that draggy and sweaty is not normal, and clean and bright is better. Some days, the grooming is as hard a chore as a workout.

I only did a quickie grocery shopping thing this past Saturday, so protein sources are scarce. I need to hit Whole Foods, or at minimum Publix (not as good in the meat/poultry, sigh). Hubby eats 4 protein heavy meals a day and 2 to 3 lighter more carb/fat type snacks a day, so I gotta go shop for his goodies. I am fine with eggs, cheese, whey protein (on lazy days). He's not.

This is what my share includes today:

• Strawberries
• Blueberries#
• Mangos
• Gala Apples
• Bananas
• Local FL Cauliflower
• Local FL Broccoli
• Local FL Curly Kale
• Local FL Celery#
• Local FL Green Cabbage
• Russet Potatoes
• Roma Tomatoes
• Romaine Lettuce
• Watermelon Radish
• Fresh English Peas!

Plus I add a share of extra fruit:

• $10 Fruit:
• Strawberries
• Blueberries
• Valencia Oranges

Last week, the strawberries and blueberries were wowarrific! I mean, crazy good. I hope it's a repeat. Hubby loves strawberries chopped on top of sugar free ice cream for his nite treat. I'm not a big ice cream person. I usually use yogurt or eat the fruit for dessert after supper.

Annie does a great job. And she's a really involved and caring person when it comes to responsible food supplies and eating whole and ecological stuff. So, if you're local in South Florida, consider Annie's Buying Club.  I've bought organic goodies from Annie since 2007 (back when she had a delivery service, which was great when I was sick a lot and couldn't always go to the grocery store.)  If you coordinate the weekly shares, you get your share as payment for your time/trouble.

Next subject: the artistic outing

On the way there...in car...

Interior of Moore Building

I wasn't up to my usual vim last Saturday, but we headed to the Dali Miami exhibit anyway. I'd say it was good, not great. A few pieces really appealed to me. It needed some big, notable paintings to anchor it. The lighting was a fail in some spots (like DARK, could not make out details). But the venue was cool. A historic (for Miami, which is a "young" city) '20s edifice, the Moore Building, in the design district.

Mir in walled courtyard dining at Mandolin

Middle sis and hubby at Mandolin

It turned out to be a lovely afternoon, and me, my middle sis, and hubby enjoyed the outing. I wore my green Onitsuka Tigers for comfort and we parked a couple blocks from the building.

After 2 hours of art-seeing, we walked about 3 blocks to Mandolin restaurant, where I pretty much went a little wild with the veggies and yogurt. (Except for a piece of hubby's chicken kabob, I had a vegetarian meal, cause Greek/Turkish fare...man, they know how to make veggies numsy.) Sis and I split a village salad (a bit of feta, but mostly these really ripe amazing tomatoes). Then we split this veggie stew with yogurt on top thingie whose name I forgot. A Turkish item. And I had as my entree a stuffed zucchini (stuffed with a mixture of veggies, feta, and ground almonds with tomato sauce). And Turkish coffee sans sugar and iced tea to drink. I ate too much. Even vegetarian fare can add up, calorically. Um, yeah.

Then the 4 blocks or so back to the car. I'm glad we didn't valet it--the brief walk was nice, as it was breezy.

I looked kinda crappy in the lighting within the Moore Building--look at the "in the car on the way" photo and Mandolin photos versus the exhibit ones--but here are a few with a bit of the exhibit:

Surrealistic and windblown-frizzy!

Yeah, the sculpture's reaction to my unflattering top--what
was I thinking!-- is pretty much mine seeing the photo.
Top goes to Goodwill.
The bosom is not flattered.

Comparison time: the Goya exhibit in Oct of 2007, a mere 5 months after I started blogging to find a way to lose weight~~

Differences: Glasses (I had Lasik)
3x top, versus L/XL now
Blown out hair, versus natural curls now

Way bigger than middle sis back then.

Five years younger, nearly 100 pounds fatter...

My Prince back then, a bit shaggier and heavier,
but still handsomest guy on EARTH!!!!

Hubby and I both agreed that the third floor would make a great venue for a stylish 30th anniversary party, should we hit the Lotto or something. ; ) But we'll look like crap in the photos! hahah (We "mature" gals need good lighting!)

Next subject: Exercise

Monday I did my Pilates session and walked 35 mins. Yesterday, I only walked 15 mins. I may resort to a DVD tonight, after all the errands are done. I didn't wake up until 2pm, so things are piling up.

The recommitment is still on shaky ground. BUT...I have not quit and every day, I do focus on goals and work on it, just don't have that fire burning yet.

Last matter, and please read to the end:

I will share this terrific quote from a blogger I only discovered in the last couple months, but who has fast become one of my top faves. She's eloquent. Smart. And has been down this same road we have in the fatfighting journey. She just puts the struggle into words better than most, her nimble brain able to capture stuff and verbalize it. I leave you with her words and my total desire for all of us to work on this and be well, be very, very well:

It has taken me many decades of my life to get to where I am now and I continue to pick at and untangle knots in the web I was trapped in. I still feel stuck to it in spots and occasionally feel sucked back in and trapped, but most of me is free most of the time. The one thing that I implore anyone who is trying to lose weight to do is to stop oversimplifying and talking in Yoda-isms ("there is no try, do"). There's a reason most people regain weight after they lose it and I absolutely believe it is this oversimplification and denial of the complex psychological issues that go into changing ones relationship with food. You can't do it forever with the mental tools of brute force, abuse, pat and trite mantras, a stick-to-it attitude, etc. Eventually, for most people, the psychology that got them fat in the first place will re-assert itself and they will regain.

Make it as complicated as it is and take the time to understand that it's just not so simple for most people. You didn't get messed up in a day, week, or even a year. You got messed up over a lifetime. It isn't a short-term problem and it can't be fixed with a short-term solution (and I count dieting culture as a part of "short-term"). 

Ground Regained, the starch experiment at lunch (Insulin Resistant folks, take note), and a cool new "Paleo Diet" book is out... on day Day 78 of Phase 5

Tanita-san said: 206.0
Doc's scale said: 208.0 (and I had clothes, shoes, jewelry on).

So, my scale seems pretty darn accurate. That's the Easter bloat GONE and .2 lbs down from official weigh-in. Now, to make better progress! Only 6.2 pounds off to be in ONEDERLAND! Only 20 pounds to be NOT OBESE!

~~~
Okay, for the IR among you, here is me being a guinea pig again:

I did an experiment, a perhaps foolish one, when I went out to eat with sis today after my MD appt. We headed to a Mexican joint. We ordered veggie fajitas and mixed chicken/steak fajitas, so we could share. This allowed me to have my usual protein plus veggies. I also ordered unsweetened tea, water, some no-sugar espresso to finish up (no dessert, natch).  Didn't use the sour cream. Had the dollop of guacamole for my healthy fat (and cause it tastes num). Had the pico de gallo, again, cause it's num. They don't serve cheese with theirs like I've seen some restaurants do.

But today, I had some beans. I had about 1/3 of a cup. Not a lot. No other starch. (I asked the waiter to not bother bringing tortillas --neither sister or I eat them--and I had no chips--sis has some, and the rest are bagged for hubby. I ignored the rice that came as a side.)

Well, today is the FIRST afternoon in quite a while that I got the sleepy-slumps. I don't believe this is at all a coincidence.

Normally, lately, since ditching starches, I am revved up and energized ALL DAY from the get-go. I have no slumps. I am sometimes SUPER-CRAZY -TOO-DARN-MUCH energized. I even had one person ask me recently, a tad jokingly, a tad not, if I was on something.

NO.  I'm OFF something.

Seriously, I don't do drugs unless they're Rx for a condition. I've NEVER EVER EVER done any illegal drug, not even in my teen years. I was a goody-two shoes like you would not believe in High School. I mean, when the vice-principal reprimanded me, it was for reading my Bible at lunch break. Yeah, I got harassed for that. Snarf.

Needed to clarify it wasn't drugs, too much caffeine, or too much thyroid meds. (They've been checked often and my levels are within limits and excellent.)

It's the Lacto-Paleo/Primarian way of eating I've had. That's what makes me seem hyper at times. :)

When I eat starch-free, I have:

No yawning.
No loss of pizzazz.
No desperation in hour-long workouts.
No lethargy in front of the TV prime time.

I have:

So much energy I sometimes wanna workout again after my trainer-led hour of Pilates is done. Or I want to go out walk again after I get back from 40 mins. And a healthy sex drive. And low appetite. And no cravings (beyond mild normal desires). And no binge-ing. And no dips in good mood (which is a blessing).

Even at Easter, when the family members (other than the children and my hubby, who had no starches, either) were slumped on the sofa or dozing off or yawning or calling for Cuban coffee to perk up, I went to play Frisbee with my vim in zoom-drive.

But today...I had a starch. Not even a full 1/2 cup serving. And blam: reaction.  I started getting the dozies as I checked email about 15 mins ago. That's about 2.5-to- 3 hours hours after eating.

Dat ain't no happenstance. I believe the beans caused my insulin to spike, and now I am paying the price for it with the yawns-and-dozies.

I hope this doesn't jam up my newly restored momentum. But I cannot guarantee. One thing I've read over and over is that not only are starch-sensitive/insulin-resistant folks messed up about carbs to begin with, when carbs are restricted, there is an increased-sensitivity to them, so ingesting them can cause even GREATER spikes in insulin than previously.

Well, nothing to do now but back to avoiding the stuff my pancreas does not like. Post-meal slumps suck. I want my ENERGY BACK. NOW!!! Give it back to me, you stupid pinto beans!

Yeah...I had forgotten how much the slumps suck. My brain feels slow and my whole face feels like it wants to shut down for a nap.

Okay, will drink more water, move around a bit, splash my face, and refuse to go down without a fight. If I have to walk with this sleepiness, I'm not gonna have fun. And I like having fun-walks.

Speaking of FUN: I bought the new book EVERYDAY PALEO on Saturday at Barnes & Noble, and Amazon began shipping it out yesterday. So, if you've heard the buzz and want to check it out, I liked it a lot and wrote a review. You can find my review HERE--I'm "Mir"--and if you can click "helpful" , I'd appreciate it. I like to keep my ranking under 200. (I sure did my best to be informative and helpful, which you'll see when you check it out.)

If you're a mommy and like more "clean" food and lower carb type eating, this is for you. If you have kids and insulin resistance, this is for you. Lots of pics. Nice recipes. No nonsense workout info. More pics. Shopping lists. Well, read the review I posted at amazon and I go over what the book covers.

Dat's all for today (prolly). I'm gonna go try to unslump.

Throwing blessings over all of you. See them sparkle in the spring air....Catch one!

Feeling great, dropped nearly a pound since yesterday, gonna start thinking of exercise more and more as PLAYING, and it's Day 71 of Phase 5 as I get ready for Pilates...ETA: Working out in a fasting state; I'm Stronger! I can hinge like nobody's business...And I need a smaller sports bra. :D

Tanita-san has fallen in love with me again: 209.4

That's 4/5ths of a pound down from yesterday. Hooray.  I'm getting ready for Pilates session, so I may just leave the subject there and do a partial post and finish later. :)

I'm starting to really enjoy working out, but I want to make it more like play. Pilates is kinda like that. It's my trainer and me, we do different stuff every time, we do something NEW every time, and she has many of my fave music playlists and cds to use for me, often some Japanese-rock or anime-theme comps. So, it IS like a really hard session of playing. Hard, but fun. Satisfying.

And I will say this: I FEEL GREAT. I wake up and feel GREAT. I go to bed feeling GREAT.

I love my walks. I like smelling flowers, seeing new doggies, noting other people, enjoying the architecture (MiMo), singing or humming when I'm in the warm up or cool down phases, and telling myself I'm a warrior when I'm in the brisker phases.

I want to continue to incorporate PLAY as exercise. I don't want it to be stressful mentally. It has to be fun or I won't want to do it forever.

Yesterday, while putting together supper, I was dancing around the kitchen, then running up to smooch hubby, then back to the kitchen and jumping around to some BUCK-TICK.

I kept doing this all day. Just spontaneously dancing in place, cause I felt so much energy. This is not me 20 years, 10 years, 1  year ago. I was bursting with this desire to just...RUN. Just up and go outside and run..like wind. Maybe if I ditch 50 pounds, my knees will let me. I wanna....for 20 or 30 seconds. Just run.


This is an amazing thing for a woman who felt like crap getting up for 20+ years. Who had to set the snooze button like 20 times. Now, I can spring up and feel like I have energy and goals. I LOVE THIS!

It's not worth any binge, not any fricken binge in the world, to stop feeling this good.


So, how do you make exercise exhilirating and fun? :)

(Came back on at 7:15 pm to add that REFUSE TO REGAIN is also addressing the exercise/joy issue. Hah. It's in the bloggy air. Here: READ IT.  One of her transformative principles.)

And I"ll carry on when I get back....

BACK:  The session was astounding. I could literally FEEL that I was stronger. My trainer looked at me in one position and said, 'You know, we don't need to modify this like that anymore. You have even less belly and can do it normally." She readjusted the Reformer and bam, I was hinging farther back than EVER EVER EVER! I astonished myself. I was so happy.  Everything was easier with the couple pounds less of belly. (I must be in belly fat burning cause that's where it seems to be coming off this past week.) My trainer was VERY happy. :) We like progress that's so evident.

I did start experimenting with working out on an empty stomach. I did this in the start of my Pilates journey in 2008 at 278 lbs. It didn't work. I was exhausted in minutes and wanted to die 20 minutes in. I started experimenting with protein/carb/vitamin mixtuers and hit on one that worked (Green Magma, Whey Protein, Berry Splash). But I think I can work on an empty stomach NOW with lotsa energy cause I'm more effective at burning fuel in my body. I've lost weight, the insulin resistance is improved with the new diet plan my R.D. put me on, and I'm fitter. All that combined makes me able to work out without eating for 14-17 hours, and feel no drop in vigor.

I don't have sugar spikes and crashes anymore, cause I eat to control insulin. This helps immensely with steady energy. I don't get the afternoon sleepies/slump anymore.

The reason I'm doing fasting-workouts again now is after reading about how working out on a "fast" status makes the body burn MORE FAT within the hours AFTER THE WORKOUT. So, worth a shot, yes? I"m all about burning the fat. :D And this apparently also has a beneficial effect on telomeres. Look it up. :D

So, walkies later, and hopefully a trip to the mall to get me a couple new bras and something for Easter. My dress clothes are just too big again and my sports bra is getting loose...and it's vexing when stuff doesn't fit. You look frumpy and feel out of sorts. I like my clothes more snug now. :)

Move happily and well today. Eat happily and well. Make progress to getting healthier, okay?

OK, later dudes and dudettes....

(Note: I got tired of "maybe it's this day of the challenge", so I went back and counted from February 7. It's Day 71. Yay. So, 49 days to go...7 weeks...I could lose at least 14 pounds at a 2 lb a week rate. Well into Wonderland. Yes. Yessssss.)

Day 47 of Phase 5: Scale Says...Broccolini Love, Dancing and Singing Pre Breakfast, Feeling Good Despite Allergy Season's Atacks, What I did Last Night....What 3 Tips Would You Give an Obese Pal or Relative To Help Them FatFight?

Tanita-san: 216.0

Right back where I was last weigh-in on Saturday. So, the overage is gone and it's time to make progress. I honestly don't know any reason other than salt or muscle-inflammation from some extra walking/sun/exercise. (I do have an itchy heat rash since Hatsume fair...too much sun for this photosensitive/heat-intolerant gal.) But, back down and hoping I can report some dang loss this weekend to the fearless leader. I have been eating like an angel, so I had better see some result other than clothes/tape measure. :D

I'm gonna be on a bunch of topics today, since I may be out and about tomorrow and my sister's birthday party is Sunday.

Big Sis is Catholic and does no meat at all for Lent, so my niece is making a "mini Thanksgiving" with roast turkey and fixings. I will bring healthful stuff and I can go to town on turkey breast. Yeah! I may take some broccolini, as I'm currently addicted to it.

I love it with dinner protein and I love it with breakfast eggs/egg whites/omelettes. OMG, cooked up with a scosh of EVOO and some garlic and herbs, and that baby makes an egg white omelette SING! With onions (sweet) and mushrooms (baby bella, organic) and some Mrs. Dash extra spicy and original blend and a bit of garlic/herb blend (I love Mrs. Dash stuff now)...it makes my morning.

I have learned that it pays to make EXTRA veggies for dinner and just bag the leftovers to use in omelettes in the AM for a couple days. Do the same in restaurants. Get extra steamed or roast or grilled veggies and dump 'em in morning eggies. Simplifies life, adds nutrients, filling, fiber...flavor!

So, I'm happy. Energy is great. I feel...NOT OLD (and I like that feeling, until my knees remind me otherwise). Put on some Buck-Tick and then some Benjamin Gate (one cd is after the other on the carousel) and just danced for a bit before and during making breakfast. I had my new bra on (went down a size, so got 3 new bras yesterday) so the puppies were nice and comfy as I bounced around on bare feet. I felt...so good. :)

All that talk about how exercise and eating well makes for energy: It's not bullshit. Seriously, I have not felt as good as I do this year...in 2+ decades. I'm 51 and feel like I'm back in my late twenties, energy-wise. My husband is happy cause he has his "young wife" back... in terms of my energy, enthusiasm, laughter, and sex drive. (Vavoom!)

You wanna feel young again: eat well and exercise. It will astound you how you'll feel after a while. Amazing.

I do get stuffier on my walks these days. Miami is in allergy season. At this time of year, for decades, I'd get sinusitis/bronchitis. Since I started eating better and exercising, I don't get 6+ cases of bronchitis/sinusitis a year anymore. I haven't had bronchitis since...um...late fall of 2009. (Knock on wood.)  But I still take my inhaler and tissues on my walks. My nose will stuff up from the pollens, so I will have to restart Nasonex (which can give me nosebleeds when used regularly, so I take seasonal breaks.) I do take my Advair daily, Serevent, Zyrtec (actually, started using the Kirkland generic, ALLER-TEC, and it works great for a fraction of the price, recommended), nasal  saline rinses..daily..part of maintenance. My immune system is messed up...hyperreactive..so these are necessitities. But I function. Amen. Thank you, God, for science.

And so, here I am walking last night (with tissues in hand). Hubby is carrying my inhaler in his pocket, otherwise that would be in my hand, too:

Night-Walking with my faboo ASICS and DanskinNow top and Danskin Plus Capris

Last topic: If someone you know/like/love asked you for advice on how to get onto the losing weight bandwagon, and they said keep it simple, 3 tips they might use right away...what tips would you give? What gifts would you consider giving them to help?

I may post tomorrow on the tips I'd give (or Monday, not sure), but I'd like to hear what you would offer as the 3 simplest, most effective or helpful tips or gift for an obese loved one or colleague....advice or a gift basket or some creative way to get them going that incorporates the tips/strategies. How would you do it?

Okay, enjoy your Friday, a lot! (I wanna see SUCKER PUNCH, myself!)

Fight the good fat fight while having that fun!

Day 44 of Phase 5: Fighting the Hatsume Bloat, Pics--including me and my Baggier Clothes, Feeling Energetic and Joyful, And Recommending the Transformative Blog Series...because the Transformation Inside is Essential....

I refuse to get on the scale. I'm still bloated from the insane amounts of sodium I consumed at the Hatsume Festival and in my Turkish Salad when we ate out Sunday night.

Between the soy sauce, teriyaki sauce, and feta cheese, my kidneys are creaking and the bags under my eyes are undesirable. The heat rash is also not all that becoming, but it's the price I pay for extended exposure to the sunlight in warm weather. I got a horrible case last summer (required steroid shot and cream), but it was worth it for the loads of fun we had.

Making sure I get my fruit in for the potassium. Making sure I do no skimping on water. Making sure I move to keep the blood pumping and filtering. I don't want to screw up my weigh-in cause I'm a Bloatball.

Here are a few pics of the lovely Sunday out (first the Hatsume--meaning "First Bud" --Festival at the Morikami Japanese Gardens) then at the broadwalk on Hollywood Beach to see the Supermoon rise....

My Beloved with the koi pond and well-tended foliage

I had a tough time finding something suitable (and cool enough, as it was in the 80s) to wear. My bed was piled with stuff too baggy to be comfy or flattering. I wanted something floral to represent spring, and I was down to only 3 tops that still sorta fit. One had longer sleeves and was less cool, one was sleeveless and my batwings would have been horridly on display. I went with the one that had a kimono vibe and was slightly baggy, but doable. The new jeans were already too loose in the thighs (though the waist fit okay, which was important and my pants falling is NOT an option).

Here's a pic of my clothes NOT fitting me right (which also makes you look FATTER, in case you didn't know. Well-fitting clothes, snugger in spots, gives you shape. This makes me shapeless. Ugh. Behold:

Ill-fitting clothes, but hey, I'm still HAPPY! And I adore my red Lucky bag...

Lots of nice trees. I saw this beautiful green on one young tree and asked hubby to take a pic. A fresh green that meant "spring" to me:

The baggy top that makes my boobs look enormous and the fresh green leafy tree...

My Sweetie and the Orange Supermoon over the Atlantic

Me, the surf,  and the Supermoon around 10pm

That's me at 10pm. After getting 6 hours sleep and being on my feet since noon. Look at my face. I may be a bit tired, but I'm not dead with exhaustion. Not after walking for 5 hours at the Hatsume Festival, then walking 2.5 hours on the broadwalk. I can still go for more...

 I can assure you, that I would have pooped out long before this before last fall. I would have not been able to do half this much when I was 280 and 300 lbs. I simply did not have the energy and if I stood on my feet more than an hour, my feet and ankles would blow up like balloons. I would pass out.

Okay, so you see, I had a good time doing stuff I could not do morbidly obese. At least, not do as long or with as much joy and energy.


Getting lighter and fitter means we can have MORE fun. :) That matters, right?

Now, on to a recommended blog series: If you aren't familiar with REFUSE TO REGAIN blog and the book by that name, I recommend both. Very helpful. Very tip-savvy. I got the book (which is aimed at those MAINTAINING their weight losses) because I intend to become a maintainer (and to some extent, already am, cause I've been losing and not regaining for a while now). The insight in what it takes to MAINTAIN a loss is key to all "losers." Do yourself a favor. Follow the blog. Get the book. :)

The blog has begun a series by Dr. Barbara Berkeley on TRANSFORMATIVE PRINCIPLES and the first entry is up. READ IT HERE.


I totally believe it is about transforming inside, not just out. All my other efforts were so episodic and brief and inconsistent and lacking in inner change. But the last 4 years of weight loss blogging were this sort of fertile ground that gave me input, input, trial and error, input, and hope. And when it clicked and the transformation began inside for real, then I saw results outside.

It's a process for sure. But I feel different..and I don't mean energy levels, size, etc. I mean...how I see food, how I see the bigger picture of eating...I'm not cured of wanting to overeat and eat bad stuff...but I am so much more sane. No binge in more than 9 months. Who'd a thunk it?

Well, the landscape in my interior is like a garden that's finally coming into a green as fresh as the one in that pic above. It makes me happy.

Be well...eat well....move soundly...believe in change...believe....and keep fighting the fat!

Day 26 of the Phase 4 Challenge: Where there are 96 Days to Go and In Which I'm Feeling Lethargic...then don't feel lethargic and laugh and walk my way back to ENERGIZED!

Scale: 226.2

Whoa. Almost a pound down from yesterday....

I slept a lot. Eleven hours. I started feeling that little lethargy come in yesterday and it hit today. I go through those cycles. I will need to check my blood pressure to make sure that going back to less sodium hasn't plunked my pressure too low again. I did get woozy once yesterday.

Had only two meals yesterday (hit the sack and skipped dinner). I bought extra nice ingredients to add the to quality of my food. Breakfast was a Greek Omelette--2 eggs, egg whites, oregano, Mt. Vikos gourmet barrel-aged feta, a cup of cooked organic spinach, java, water. So good. It was only an ounce of the feta, but it was so tasty. Lots and lots of oregano. Mmmm. Crisp graps on the side.

Lunch/DinnerWhatever: Rotisserie chicken breast to which I added some spices, beautiful fresh asparagus sauteed in minimal EVOO with garlic, artichoke hearts with lemon juice and garlic. Cantaloupe and raspberries on the side.  I had a square of dark, sugar-free chocolate as a treat.

Since I didn't have my usual yogurt, I took calcium supplements, and magnesium.

Really delicious. I so enjoyed my food yesterday. The 866 calories tasted like a lot more, I can tell you, just by having spices and those quality and fresh ingredients, so many colors and bursting flavors. I was happy. Yum.

Hope the mango I got is good. I want to have it later for dessert.

A cold front came in yesterday, and the walk was pleasant with the cool win in my face.

I have no appetite right now. None. But I'm gonna go make a meal and hope that spurs the salivary juices.

Allan's email told us that there are 96 days left in this challenge phase. It feels like a long time...more than 3 months....but it will pass as quickly as this month has been passing. It's gonna pass ANYWAY, so might as well let it pass healthfully and end up trimmer.

I've slacked with the strength exercises. No excuses. Just have. It's on the agenda for today, but feel free to kick my butt over it. The lethargy took over....

Happy Friday, folks. Feel the freedom from fat coming? It's already partly here, right, but it's coming!

Update: Lethary has moved on. The walk helped oodles. The stairs...well, only made it to the third one though the pace was relatively fast. I got woozy. Getting cool in Miami and I love it!  Talked to my health insurance nurse (they check on me every 2 months), and she said I sounded great, upbeat, motivated and happy. I realize that I keep hearing this lately. I keep being told I look good, smile a lot, look happy and energetic. Hubby came into the kitchen yesterday, from where he was noshing in the living room, setting up our evening's anime streaming, as I was fixing my second meal,  and said, "I love hearing you laugh." He hugged me and was grinning. Yep...I was laughing in the kitchen. I've been laughing a lot. Even over the phone, the nurse sensed my joy. :D  I would not trade a binge for this. This is amazing, feeling like this.  While walking, the UPS guy shouted, "Looking good!" I've been getting some, um, male looks on my walk. Maybe I am looking good....maybe? ; )

Day 8 Phase 4: Where I decide this is the week I get results or I Make a Change....and how the hunger has not been an issue even at our belated "Christmas" celebration....where I shot temptations down!

Scale has not budged.

I say this the day after I had my family's Three King's Day (belated Christmas) celebration. I turned down the dip and chips. I rejected the chocolate and cake. I had to literally just move away from the dining area cause of all the festive yummies on there. I did not have the turkey fricasse, corn, etc. I had none of the homemade pineapple upside down cake. Most telling, I had none of the Cuban coffee my brother brewed.

That's not unimportant. Several stunned familial heads turned to me to say, "What, Mirty's not having coffee? She's really esrious."

I never turn down Cuban coffee. :) I did. It has sugar. (Note: Eldest sis makes it sans sugar, give me my portion, then adds sugar for everyone else when she makes it at her house. Ain't that really sweet?)

I had taken my decaf green tea bags and made me a mug o' that. Snack time, I had my string cheese. Bottle of water in hand, I learned to say no, no , no.

My caloric count for the day was 1093. I had switched to a different string cheese that had fewer calories and a fat free instead of lowfat yogurt yesterday, so the calories reflected that.

I am on the verge of tears. Seriously. Seven days averaging less than 1200 calories and I'm only 0.8 pounds lower than P4 Weigh-in. I've never had such a crappy scale week while eating low-cal. Never.

I'm feeling a bit fragile. Not just the scale, just some other issues, too, that have come up this weekend, but mostly it's the being good calorically with dashed expectations.

So, I give it this week. This week makes or breaks it.

I did my groceries for the plan last night on the way home. I have my egg whites, fruit, salad fixings, chicken breast, oatmeal (it's actually made and tupperwared in the fridge to portion when I want it this week), string cheese, yogurt, cashews, raisins, deli turkey, fat free hot dogs (never had these in my life and don't know if I'll even like em, but chicken gets old and these were something different), lite high fiber breads, lower sodieum canned soups, veggies, Mrs Dash, Montreal Seasoning, etc.

This week. I see results or I go back to my three meals no snacks from 1200 up to 1600 cals, different cals each day according to how I feel like eating. (I'm not huge on snacking, and I only do it cause of the plan. I much prefer 3 more substantial meals than smaller meals + snacks.)

I will say it's NOT cause of hunger. I felt none yesterday. NONE AT ALL. Did I WANT to eat dips, chip, etc. Yes. But there is a difference between appetite and hunger. I felt no hunger. The day before, I don't remember if I did--I'd have to check my bloggy info. I have not felt pangs or anything.

I just cannot deal with crap results when the math says 1200 calories should give me 1.8 + pounds loss per week....

I have no desire to go bonkers. I have no binge inclination right now. Those are blessings. :) The journey the past few months has helped a lot. And like Karen/Sunshine often advises, I've come to tell myself when the temptations are before me: "It's just food."

Energy is fine. Yesterday it was good. I played some football/catch (not running, as I had chunky heels on), but lots of throwing and catching, bending, and going after missed balls. Got my breathing up and sweated enough to glow a bit. :D I'm gonna have to keep sneakers in my trunk so I can change into when a spontaneous chance to burn some calories comes up.

Got nice compliments yesterday, too. "Looking slimmer!" Heard a "skinny" tossed about, but that's a relative "skinny".hahah. Compared to previous Pentagon-sized me, I guess. I felt attractive, which is nice.

Today, Pilates and strength training and my walk (hope the weather doesn't go bad). My butt is still some sore from FRIDAY's squats, can you believe it?

So, that's my recap and the day's plan.

Doing breakfast and water now. Well, the coffee and water part. Food part is done: egg white (with Mrs. Dash onion/herb for flavor), lite bread, banana, milk with cinnamon. I expect lunch to be the salad option, just cause it's easy and I get my veggies.

Have a great, fresh, new 2011 week. Be well...