Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Weight Milestones--when you get to a memory point

Many blogs ago, here and on my old blog, I had talked about weight milestones, those numbers that had special significance. Sometimes, the milestone was about crossing obesity/weight levels: not being severely morbidly obese, not being morbidly obese, not being obese, etc.

Sometimes, it's because we REMEMBER being a certain weight, with all the accompanying nostalgia/events. I remember being 172. I remember my skin being tauter Ya don't lose 127 lbs without serious loose skin issues. I remember doing aerobics and yoga at this weight. I remember doing low-fat/high carb (oodles of pasta). I remember wearing white shorts and a white tank when working out at home. I was 26 or so. Young!

This 172 is 52. It's got saggy, crinkly skin from big weight loss. It has less energy than 26 year old 172.

I remember wishing I was slimmer and reading diet books at 172. Dissatisfied with my body, though not horribly so. Just discontent.

Now, I see 172 differently. It's inevitable. Get to 300 lbs and 172 seems like a dream come true. It is a dream come true. Only it's an imperfect dream, because there are consequences, there is aging, there is, right now, all the anxiety and stress that I'm dealing with that saps joy.

So, it was emotional when I stepped on the scale. 172. One of those weights that had meaning and memories attached, for whatever reason the brain holds on to such matters.

I suspect all of us who dieted or watched weight have milestone numbers in mind, numbers from the past that aren't just numbers, but have clear feelings and states of mind and visual memories attached to the number.

Do you?

7 comments:

AlmostGastricBypass said...

AWESOME, INSPIRING, YAY

deanna said...

My anniversary is next week 24 years. I am close to that weight again. It is within reach. I remember!

Suzan said...

Congrats!

Yeah, I remember 150. Right before I got pregnant in 1988.

If I ever get down to 150 again, I think I'll have a private, all-day cry fest.

Deb Willbefree said...

The 170s seem t be milestones for a lot of us.

I could have written this post as far as the young vs older 172 pounds.

When I got to 180, I started to feel normal. Just a sixty year old woman who needed to lose a few. Like most other 60 year old women. At 172, coincidentally, the weight loss went to my face. I wrote a post about it.

I'd never had an age issue. Probably because I always looked younger than my years. I used ot joke that the fat puffed out teh wrinkles.

I didn't know it wasn't a joke.

One day, I looked in the mirror and saw my elderly mother looking back at me. (The picture is in that post. People couldn't help but comment that I did, indeed, look older than pictures I had taken just a month before.)

It totally freaked me out. It looked like I had aged a good 20 years.

The regain began soon afterwards.

Yep, I remember 172 alright. I hope your face fares better!

Deb

Deb Willbefree said...

Ha. If you're curious, I found the link to my version of your post. My aged face is at the bottom of the post. It was taken a couple of weeks before the weigh in posted on that blog.

http://satisfiedwithgoodthings.blogspot.com/2010/10/i-was-okay-til-it-got-to-my-face.html

Mirtika said...

Thanks for the link, Deb! That looks vaguely familiar, so I might have popped into your blog back then.

My face and neck DEFINITELY do not look as nice as they did 10 or 15 or 20 lbs ago. It's very bothersome. To the point I worry about more loss, for sure. At my age, that facial fat was a saving grace. :(

It's awful to see age so undeniably in the lines/droop/hanging bits. The jowls and neck issue. Ugh.

I wish we didn't age. :-/

Mirtika said...

Suz, if you hit 150, and you need it, then yes, have a cryfest. Sometimes, that's exactly what we need. :(