OMG, I found my "before" pic top, size 30/32! Trying it on..with other clothes from then on me NOW! Lotsa Pics!

I gave a yelp! Did you hear it?

I was going through tubs of old, stored clothes. I filled up two and half lawn and leaf bags worth--those 39 gallon capacity ones--of clothes to toss, and filled one bag with clothes to give away (ie, in good condition or still had tags on).

Then I found... THAT shirt. The black embroidered tunic top that I wear in the pic you see as my before/highest-weight shot. (It's both in the upper left sidebar and in the the Progress Pics page). Well, here is that old pic:

And here is the shirt on me TODAY, with a 121 lb difference:

I tried to turn to the angle in the 2004 pic.
I gathered up the shirt to show body difference.

I can fit a teen in here with me!

And that's not all. I found a workout top from Junonia I used to love cause it's my "signature" colors --ie, black and red. Junonia was the place I had to go to for 4x and 3x workout-wear way back when. Here I am in that top at 278 lbs in Jan of 2009 at a local state park, racoon in background:

I'd been doing Pilates for 6 months and
felt BETTER, but obviously...just getting
started on my mojo. Food not under control!

And the same top today, found in the tub along with others from my "biggest" periods:

Loads of SPACE.
You can see my piles of
sorting mess on the bed!

Side view to compare with side view above.

And here is my favest red top from my highest weight time, size 30/32, both wide and gathered:

This used to be snug in the chest/belly

I love this color and print and fabric
and style combo--and so comfy--
that I hesitate even now to toss it. Sigh...

I tried some other stuff from the "biggest periods" clothes:

These used to be my GO TO fave pants.
These are 3x, as I don't have any 4x ones left.
I threw those out. I can hide in these during
a hurricane. ; ) They did used to sit at my waist.

These next, are NOT stretch pants. These were dress pants, zipper and button type, that were at my highest size: 28. I'm 14 now. Half that size. I buttoned and zipped them, and still had this much space. Remember, these ain't stretch!!!~~

I did find a top from my 4x highest weight period. This is a workout top, another from Junonia:

And now a skirt:

After all that, I got dressed for my walk. Seeing my progress--SEEING it and FEELING it--makes me not want to ever go back there again:

Determined NOT to go back to that!

Be well.

Perspective on the asthma/allergy (or why I need to NOT whine)...Better Breathing, Better Journaling, Crap Scale....but it will move. I keep the faith...Baggy "goal shorts" pic and naked mirror time motivation (no pic--ever!)..and how much hubby can eat (but I can't)...plus joy comes in the morning (afternoon, evening) with a Charlie Brown Praise Break...

Yesterday ended up better than it began. By my evening walk, I could up the pace. Breathing was nearly normal but nasal congestion, while improved, remained.

Make me wonder if the Pilates session did the respiratory good.

I will note that, so far, this summer has been MILES better than a couple decades worth of summers. I didn't need to cancel a whole month of exercise sessions. I didn't need nasal cauterization. I didn't rely on Nasonex (which I quit taking after the March onslaught, and usually start up again before August, to ready myself). I'm much less affected. I just got used to feeling GREAT on the non-crazy-allergy months, so I expect to feel and breathe great. The impediment this month, while frustrating, is nothing compared to summers past. Even the trainer commented on my improvement over the past 3 summers she's worked with me. Well, it's true. :)

I need to keep perspective. I am a whole, whole lot better. I am not dripping gobs of snot or needing to see an ENT or longing for Prednisone to put me out of my misery. :)

It's amazing to me after having years of being a "respiratory cripple", as I tagged it in the early 90s, when walking to the bathroom was enough to wind me, when I became often housebound, when I would have 6+ bronchitis episodes a year.

This is so much better. I guess I wanted to skip the bad altogether. To get a reprieve.

And I did. This is a reprieve. I will be thankful and not whine. :)

Today, to keep the motivation up, I spent some time in front of the mirror stark naked. And you know, I didn't mind it so much. I knelt on the bed and looked in the dresser mirror and thought, "Wow, if I hadn't gotten morbidly obese and had still done Pilates, my body would be amazing..." and then I thought, "But for an old dame who did wreck her body for 2+ decades, it's not bad. I kinda like that woman there."

My body would terrify a Hollywood starlet and it probably would disgust the shallow types who only see beauty in the perfect smooth slenderness of magazines...but me, I looked and thought, 'Yeah. I want to keep this. I don't wanna go back."

Hanging skin and droopy boobies and rippled butt and all, I had a woman's curves and some muscle and lean cool looking legs. This is my motivation today. To keep this and to do even better...to not lose what the hard war has won me.

I stayed in my challenge calorie counts yesterday. I exercised 75 minutes altogether. I drank all my fluids. I stayed away from starches. And while the scale didn't move down, I feel like I'm starting to get a grip again from the slippery slope. (fingers crossed) Onward...I don't lose heart or faith.

And to commemorate the re-commitment to MY own transformation today, a pic of me fitting into an old pair of "goal shorts". White shorts. With a white tank. I haven't worn white in..in..I can't remember. Fat people tend to avoid light colors. Well, this fat woman did. But here I am, all in white. These shorts are XL. I bought them back when I was 4x. They didn't go over my hips then. They do now--with room to spare:

My plate again has room to spare, too. Back to reining things in and not letting portion creep get me.

I wish I could eat like hubby and be on the verge of underweight like he is. Sigh. Men. So lucky. Can eat more than we do! Here's the "lunch and snacks" I packed last night for hubby --not including the breakfast I pre-made for him to nuke or the apple and banana he takes in his work-bag for his extra fruit snacks or the Larabar and nuts he keeps at his desk for emergency hunger:

Hubby's lunch for today...with snack..in his
EASY LUNCHBOX set, cooler not shown.

Today's lunch part 1: grilled chicken breast with 1/2 cup Mexican rice and a spinach mozzarella salad  
Lunch part 2: sirloin burger with cheddar, asparagus, mashed potatoes (real butter and cream)
Snack: Beanitos with salsa, cottage cheese with strawberries and cantaloupe, dark chocolate square.
Not showing: nuts, apple, banana, Larabar

Yes. That's his "lunch bag" contents. And he's on the border of underweight. (He lost 60 or so pounds altogether, half this year when he did the Primal experiment. Experiment cancelled. He dropped so much weight, I had to put starches back in the diet in the form of rice and potatoes, with the occasional legume (peas, those Beanitos now and then). He was turning into pure bones. Starch is fattening, so there you go. Eat the starches, keep from losing too much.

So, for you men who want to drop fat like mad, go Paleo/Primal. Hubby literally had to eat ALL DAY, snack ALL DAY, eat multi-meals to just keep weight on...and still got bony.

Grrrrr. This is so unfair. I want to eat all day long, too! hahahahahah

And for those, like me, who won't be reaching certain goals by Slimmer This Summer Challenge's end, don't ever give up and repeat this quote I got from Anne today:

“When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, 

don't adjust the goals, adjust the action steps.”

Anyway, be good to yourself with healthy foods and movement and be very, very happy today! It's your day for JOY!

And for believers out there having a hard time, going through the dark night of temptations and sorrow,  this one's for YOU!

AMEN!

28 Days Left in Slimmer This Summer Challenge...and what is challenging you today?...Laugh it Off Newsletter gives me a nod, yay!...and a pic of just-got-up me ready to MOVE!

Counting TODAY, there are 28 days left in the Slimmer This Summer Challenge. Some are rocking it. Some are having setbacks or derailments. Some are hanging in and losing steadily.

We've got 28 days to continue to make progress. I intend to.

Tanita-san today: 186.4

Less than yesterday. I'll take it!

I think finally resting and a lessening of stress has allowed my body to release fat again. I had pretty much just maintained during the worst of July's sufferings, and for me, that was one of the few positives, a rather great victory personally,  in the midst of chaos and the storm and loss.

I got up shortly ago (yeah, I'm a nite owl),  and before washing my face or brushing my teeth or setting my slept-on curls in order, I put on my workout clothes and took this pic to remind me of what I need to get back to TODAY:

Waving HI! at 186.4, with stinky breath,
messy curls, but my workout duds are on!

I am deciding whether to breakfast first, just drink coffee and get to it, or what, cause, well, it takes me a while to actually fully WAKE UP! But today, my inner athlete needs to reawaken.

What is your most urgent Challenge "challenge" today? Food? Tracking? Exercise? Water/fluids? Support? Believing in yourself? Shopping for good food? What?

Whatever it is: Beat that devil down! Get it done!

(This is addressed to me above all!)

And it's nice to be though nicely of, right? So, my thanks for the linky love from Rebecca Regnier in the Laugh it Off newsletter for August 1, 2011  As someone who plans to make all her birthdays since this year's "health-affirming and diet-supportive", I love the idea on focusing on party favors that are not at all food/edible/caloric. :D

We've got a brand new day and week to make it count. Off we go...

Be well...

Day 3 of StSC: Making up the calories, Vegging Out due to Smoke and Rash, The Weird "is it bone or what?" Thing, New Fila Workout Top, and My Food Plate(s) for Lunch!

Tanita-san: 194.4 (the starch bloat is ebbing)

But I had starch again today after Pilates. I am trying to balance things. One serving a day like the R.D. recommended (and ok if some days none). Later on that. But first...

The Challenge Update for Day 2:

Calories: 850
This was not intentional. I simply was not hungry. Since I had an over 1200 eating day Monday, I figure this balances stuff out some. :) I am actually in deficit, since 1435 - 850 = 2285. Back on track.

Exercise/Push-ups Progress: Nope.
We had smoke issues and hubby insisted I stay inside. I actually kept my workout clothes on until 10pm, but didn't wanna risk setting off my asthma. So, being sore and all from Pilates and push-ups, I figured: "Veg-out day to build muscle!" Today, we move! My goal is to exercise 5 days a week, and I used up one of my rest days.

Prayer: Yep. You got prayed for, people.

Fluids: Yep. Drank what I had to.

Encouragement: I posted on several challenge blogs. And hey, my post was encouraging, yes? :) It sure was LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG.

Okay. So, Day 2 went fine, other than the smoke and my assorted rashes and the healing bug bites. My legs still look weird from those...

What isn't weird is my new Fila exercise top. I love it. It's got enough fabric that I can wear a regular bra. I's comfy. I like the black and white thing going. And the armholes are large enough to not impede Pilates movements. Yeah, baby. I got it for less than 15 bucks. Winner!

Here it is. My Danskin capris make a lumpy banded-waistline line under it, but does anyone really care? ~~

Fila top in XL!

Love my new top & my 10 lb new kettlebell (see on floor, gray/blue thingy)

Lunch today from Thai place... before consumption.
That's (from left bottom then clockwise) fresh papaya with lime juice,
fresh organic strawberries, vitamins in teacup, chilled green tea, water,
On plate: avocado sushi, kappa roll, 3 skewers (2 1/4 ounces weighed WITH sticks)
of satay chicken.Dunno why I put so much flatware. It was mostly fingers time!

After consumption: Too full to eat strawberries, saved for supper.
Lefover rice (I pull some out so I consume an eyeballed 1/2 cup)
439 cals, & this makes 10 glasses of fluids for the day...6 more to go.

Well, I called my doc for an appt Friday. For a couple months now, I have something bugging me in my butt area, like right up where the coccyx/sacrum bony bits are. Very uncomfortable in some Pilates moves and it bothers me when I lie down on my back in bed. A memory foam topper helped, but I still feel it. I don't know if it's bone, cartilage, a cyst, whatever. It's annoying and I need to have her check it and refer me to someone who can properly diagnose it. I also need to see my endo and get a colonoscopy and a bone density scan and, soon, another mammo and another Pap....yadda yadda.

Growing old is a pain in the butt--literally right now--and means so many tests and what-not. Seeing docs, I'm used to since childhood. I see my primary care one at least every 2 to 3 months and my endo 2 to 3 times a year (2x if no problems, more if issues arise).

I envy y'all who are in perfect health. Thhhpppttt!!!

Anyway, wishing you all a great 3rd day of the Slimmer This Summer Challenge. Stay within calories. Move if it's your exercise day. Drink good, clean water or non-crap fluids. Pray, if you're the praying sort, that we succeed and succeed with amazing numbers!

I pray the blessings of health upon you!

Later...

Assorted Pics: One year Check of Fatwings THEN and NOW...and yeah, they hang!...Dinner Out Sleeveless Outfit...New Shorts and Tank in XL from Sports Authority..and look, smaller belly! Wooo!

Lyn of Escape from Obesity, one of my favest of all bloggers, fatfighting and otherwise, has had a hard time lately with her upper arms.

 :(

Hey, all of us who've been fat/are fat/were very fat prolly have issues with that body part. While fat, we hate the big ole ham arms. While slimming, we hate the emptying skin that crinkles and hangs. When at goal--I'm not there, but I've read enough blogs to know-- we hate the empty sac of skin and think about plastic surgery.

Yeah. I hate my upper arms. But I've been wearing sleeveless since last year. I figure if you don't like seeing my ugly upper arms, too bad for you. It gets too dang hot in Miami and I've gone too many years covering up and tolerating the raging hot-humidity. Last year, with hot flashes still occasionally striking, I said, "I NEED SLEEVELESS" and I let my freaky arms fly!

Here's a pic of my fatwings last May, and even after TWO YEARS of Pilates in this pic, there they are, with more muscle, but oodles of fat:

May 31, 2010 --fatwings at 266 lbs

 Here are my fatwings today in my new purple Soffe tank:

Fatwings at 198 lbs on May 23, 2011, after Pilates (excuse the dirty hair)

I found my new workout wear to be great for Pilates. For an 8 buck tank, worked lovely. I like functional CHEAP. Snug, but not so snug as to impede Pilates moves. We did ALL sorts of new stuff today and trainer was woohooing my increased flexibility and ability to do stuff even harder and better with less abdominal fat. I felt pretty damn great doing the Cadillac stuff! I need to get another pair or two of these shorts. They were super comfy and stayed in place, and if I could find the tank with a V, even better. In some positions, the edge of the decolletage hit my lip. I need it a bit lower.

First, me in a purple top back in Nov of 2008 at nearly 280 lbs:

Purple Top at 278 lbs...Nov 2008.."I gots HAMS for arms!"

Aspire 7 inch Bike Shorts ($17) and Soffe tank ($8) in XL; arms hanging naturally.

Nov 2009 at 268 lbs. I was pressing my arms close to body with effort.

Still lots of torso/back/arm fat to lose!

Belly is not as sticky-outie. This pleases me no end.

Older pic at 268 lbs. Compare.

Sweetest Hubby in the World and Pic-Taker, and He Pleases me No End!

 Anyway, that adorable man I married took me to dinner last night. I have had stress/mood issues creeping back up, and this cheered me up immensely (especially since it forced me to pretty up and think "date" attitude!)

Yep. I ate more than planned cause that no-crouton Caesar Salad was soooo crazy good, but dang, that was a lot of dressing! I couldn't even guesstimate how much that dressing was...and I ain't happy with that. No bread, no dessert, lots of amazing decaf made in a Frieling French press right at our table. I ordered three, this was so good. About 6 cups of coffee. Yum. Hey, and fluids!

Anyway, the Princess is solidly back on plan TODAY! No dressing orgy. But here  I am, bare arms in view:

Don't care if anyone thinks they're gross. I felt pretty and had fun and did lots of smooching of hubby between cafe sipping. Fitting MORE than comfortably in a booth. Lotsa room.  Life is good!~~

Well, I had my post Pilates fluids while uploading all these pics and I can have my lunch salad and fruit.

I wish you a very happy Monday and may this be a great week of fatfighting. Encourage a fatfighter today!

Later...

Day 45 of Phase 5: Cheap, but Cute, Workout Wear For Those Changing Size Every Month or Two....

First off: I strongly believe that having fun workout wear that makes you feel able to move and makes you feel NOT HOMELY helps motivate you to work out. On days I feel cute in my workout wear, I can exercise harder.

I don't know why that is? If it's the same thing that makes tea tastes better in a lovely cup than in styrofoam. :)

Don't wear all ratty stuff. Put on lip gloss. Put on nice comfy workout clothes. And you can take on the fitness ball with finesse.

Anyway...

I got sick of paying the higher price for quality workout wear that then would be baggy in a couple months. I've retired to many $30, $40, and up items after too few wears.  Annoying and a waste of moolah.

I decided to get some cheapo stuff at WalMart. It didn't matter if it couldn't hold up to many washes. I didn't intend to fit into them for too long...

I actually LIKE their DanskinNow line. So far, everything has been comfy and less than 15 bucks, some less than 10 bucks. Now, that's more like it.

Here is a blue top I wore walking yesterday:

Danskin Now Top from WalMart

I love the blue. I like the side white strip that's slimming. I like the black pattern that adds interest. It's comfy. Holds the puppies nicely snug. It's a racer-back style, so if you need mobility in the arms/shoulders (like for Pilates or weight training), here ya go.

This one's in the XL (16-18) size. The capris are a pair from Old Navy online, their plus line, in 1x. Not too pricey. I prefer the capris from regular Danskin Plus online (oh, man, they last and last and take washing after washing), but while I'm in the losing phase, it's time to be realistic. If it's only gonna fit properly for a couple months....well...you know...it's now Danskin Now for me. WalMart is not a place I used to shop but rarely, but as long as I'll get my workout stuff there, they'll see more of me.

You can see a snack on the table..a bowl of blueberries. And, hey, Beth! If you're reading this, check out the WWII print tea towel on the table (using it as a mini-tablecloth while I eat on it). It's not that clear in this pic, but there it is, under my small white squared-off bowl of blueberries....

TJ Maxx is also a place to check out for good quality name brands in workout wear in some larger sizes (not supersized big, but maybe up to XXL).

After I woke up today (no makeup, didn't do anything to my hair, so be forewarned), I decided to try on some of those TJ Maxx outfits I bought nearly a month ago. Needed a bit more loss to fit back then. Now, I can wear them. Beware, the following photos show a fat,middle-aged woman's midsection sans covering. And I'm wearing no undies, it's just pure fat under there. Well, and some Pilates muscles. :D

These I got at TJ Maxx, discounted, good brands. I also got that top with the long belled sleeves in my "Progress Bit by Bit" in the left upper sidebar. They're all workout pants. I didn't take pics of all of them (the grey and black bootcuts), but these are form fitting, so they show some progress waist-wise and hip-wise, and they unfortunately show my hanging pannus (the apronlike droop of belly that morbidly obese folks, especially apple-shaped ones, do get). I hate it, and I'm hoping with more weight loss and exercise, it won't vex me so much. Ultimately, I might need surgery. I'll think about that at the right time (ie, 2 years after goal weight to give skin time to tighten a bit if it will).

First, these, where I looove the little peep of turquoise on the waistband:

Nice turquoise accent! Notice price tags...

Mondetta Performance Gear capri leggings

I like having a waist. :D I hate having the big belly. I'd rather have that fat on my BUTT! I would have to be the Latina with a flattish butt. How unfair.

Marika Balance Collection Capris with floral detail. Price tags dangling...$15...

I like having ankles not swollen like water balloons. :) And shapelier calves. Thanks, Pilates!

Okay, the following ones are HARD to post. the fabric is lighter, the fit is snugger, and the cut is lower, so it exposes some less than lovely bits. Without undies, some camel toe going on. Urk. I need to get some low cut undies to wear with these babies. These are Nike Dri-Fit. Really sturdy feeling, smooth fabric. Got em for $20. A steal imo for that quality fabric. Will take a lot of washing, I think. The band matches my old sports bra that I'm wearing (that one's years old and used to be super snug and higher on me. It's looser and lower now, obviously.

Too low cut to wear OUT. For home workouts...

The droopy pannus is clear here.

Pannus on display above!  Imagine how much MORE awful that would all be without nearly 3 years of Pilates strengthening my core. Eek!  Cautionary tale for the younger, not yet crazy obese among you: Don't get morbidly obese. Your skin can't take it. It will droop. And it will NOT be pretty.

Anyway, I'm glad I can buy off the rack now. Easier. Hitting WalMart and TJ Maxx when I need something to walk/exercise in or just go casual in makes life easier.

Where do you get your workout gear? Anyone have good underwear suggestions for those lower cut capris for me? I'm used to using briefs (microfiber) from Avenue or Lane Bryant, and now I have to start thinking "normal" store undies, I guess. :)

What 232 Pounds Looks Like On Me (with links to me in the 270s on down) AKA I Hated Yesterday's No MakeUp, Ugly Outfit Pics, so I Call DO OVER!

For the 242 lb pics, HERE.
For the 252 pics, HERE.
For the 265 pics, HERE.
For roughly 278, HERE.

Same walking route with hubby today (such a beautiful twilit sky on the way back after this, the wonderful blues and moon and planets and stars and palm tree silhouettes and the scent of assorted subtropical blooms. NIIIIICE!!!)

This is more my usual workout stuff--a lot of black and navy, more formitting (for Pilates, that helps). This racer-back tunic, this is the first time I've worn it. IT FITS. I bought it a few years ago, but it was too tight. I was rummaging for something to wear (the pipes were replaced and the washer can now be used without causing a flood, but I didn't have time to wash my workout stuff). It fits! So happy. It's "minidress length", but I wear it with shorts under with a sports bra (in lavender). I put on lipstic and face powder and put some conditioner to moisten my curls, so I feel...a lot less dumpy and old than yesterday.

Here we go:

That's me laughing cause the wind is blowing the fountain water at me. :D

Compare to January 2009 in the high 270s, early in my Pilates journey, struggling to move down (I stayed around the 270s for ages):

Look at THAT BELLY! You can imagine how hard it was for me to walk into any fitness studio/gym!!!

ANYWAY...back to the present...
Fun walk. 30 minutes. Beautiful hubby makes the time go faster. And I'm willing to walk brisker with him cause if my knee/ankle/foot give out, I have a way to get help. Tomorrow, he's off and we don't need (I hope, Please God) to deal with anymore repairs. Our last weekend was also taken up with plumbing issues (different ones). I want to do something FUN FUN FUN....enjoy the winter. Miami is glorious in winter.

Happy evening to all! (Go walk if you haven't.)