Day 20 Phase 4 Challenge: Another small downtick, so weigh-in for Challenge should be my best yet! R.D. Delighted with me! A dose of deep optimism; A Lazy Saturday with NPR while Hubby Works On Book, and pretty much the only stuff you can do to help your loved ones choose to eat more healthfully when they refuse to commit....

Tanita-san: 228.8

Yesterday:
calories: 1074
exercise: rest day
hunger: very little appetite
mood: very, very good

My appointment with the R.D. went great. Her scale showed a 5 lb loss. Energy is zooming. Sleep is good. Mood is amazing. She said, "Well, my job doesn't get better than on days like this." I was pleased. Since I'm still crazy motivated, she said we could schedule the next meeting in 2 weeks, rather than one week, and then see if I only want monitoring once a month or whatever I desire.

I have never felt this "high" on a healthy eating plan. I've been steadily losing for over a 6 months, and it just seems to get better the more I try and the more I learn about my body and its needs. I'm sure there is loads more to learn, but I am feeling genuinely psyched and optimistic about goal NOT being a pipe dream..and that, in itself, is a major change. In the back of my mind, even when I mouthed optimistic affirmations, I didn't really BELIEVE THEM, not fully in my brain, and not in the depths of my heart.

I believe now.

It's cool and overcast, and hubby does his work on the 2nd edition of his textbook Saturdays early, so I put on NPR and enjoyed the last bit of Car Talk, then Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me! (My fave funny NPR program, and the "fake news" blurb about a Menudo member was so hilarious, I almost dropped my eggs wile cooking), and after some non-comedic stuff (the one old abuse, yowza, that was painful), there's the lighter/funny Says, You.

I woke up totally NOT hungry. For some folks,this is par. Not me. My appetite tends to be ready for breakfast. I looooooove breakfast. I adore having breakfast. I am eager for it.

Today, meh. Not so much. So, I chopped my veggies, got the pan ready, made my egg and egg whites very pretty, like a sombero, with the veggies embedded into the round "brim" of eggwhites and the "crown" the egg yolk. Had papaya and raspberries on the side. Great Brazilian Safira Bourbon java.

Trying to decide if I should just shoot my weigh-in to A today or wait til tomorrow? I'm always nervous I'll miss the deadline. Well, I'll think on it.

Had a long chat with my eldest sis yesterday. She's been anxious and vexed for years about the obesity of her two kids. I explained my journey a bit, and how for me, just making a bit of change, trying out stuff, learning, getting into regular exercise..it was a process, not a "fell swift" sort of thing. And that I had to learn this stuff--what goes on in my brain, what goes on in my hormones, how much I needed to cut back to lose roughly X a week, the effects of macronutrients on hunger and progress. I tried raw foods. I tried vegetarian most-days. I tried higher dieting calories. I am doing now lower dieting claories. I tried low carb, lower carb, Zone-ish carbs, High Carb/low fat. I find lower carb (not induction low, but lower than average for sure) works best for my Insulin Resistance, while allowing me the fruits and yogurt I love and the occasional whole grain I enjoy.

I said all she can do is not have crap at her house (which she does, deny it as much as she likes, she does--soda with sugar, chocolates, white crackers, and when we get together, Cuban pastries, cookies, etc). I said the only thing in her control is to control her own environment, so that when the son visits and daugher are home, and they want something, there's nothing on hand but what's healthful. If there isn't junk there, then they can't have it, unless they buy it and bring it themselves. That puts it on them, not her. She can say, "I have salad fixings and some chicken. Want some?" She can keep veggies and fresh fruit and offer that. Maybe cut it up and put it out to tempt. She can keep water front and center, not juices or sodas. She could have sugar free fudgsicles or Jell-o to offer as a "sweet treat". (I guarantee you that my niece and nephew are I.R. as well, as they have abdominal obesity and I've seen the darkening skin marker on nephew.)

I said, "That's all you can do. Be someone who refuses to stock, store, display, or offer crap."

Because, ultimately, we choose what to eat.

We can call it a craving or a preference or a stressful day or TOM or whatever, but when the food goes in the mouth, we made that choice. You can blame your mom for giving you crap growing up, but you can't blame her once you're old enough to think of yourself as more independent, your own "self", and are able to make your own meals (and by age 15 we pretty much are staking out our territory , and we could all make our own sandwiches, salads, beverages, etc, unless we're handicapped in some way.) By age 18, barring disability, you eat what you choose from what's at home. The worst choices...they're on you, not mom, not dad, not nana.

So, we hope our loved ones make better choices and spare themselves the agonies of increasing girth and limited mobility and incipient heart disease and diabetes (and heart disease and diabetes runs in their Pa's side of the family). But you cannot force. YOu can only encourage and support and NOT be a food-drug dealer.

Give your loved ones love and real loving food, which is not cakes/pies/crap. Real loving food helps them be well and live longer...

Happy Weekend, folks!

Best of Plans, Not Best of Actions

2131

2131

2131


That's how many calories I had YESTERDAY! 80% of my good intentions were blow out the birthday window.

I didn't eat the gumdrops. I didn't eat the Kit Kats spread out on the table around the birthday cake. I didn't eat the rice. I tried not to notice the Cuban bread, and I resisted its siren call. I didn't drink the sugary cokes standing around.

I served myself chicken breast and salad, skipped the dressing, but did cave on the tamale and major-comfort-food tostones.

I did eat 4 diffident bites of said birthday cake after niece cut a small, small slice for me.

That after I went so psyched. My hair looked good, my makeup was smooth, and I fit into one of my "goal" outfits. Size 22 jeans. (I fit into a previous identical style but size 24 jeans not that long ago. I bought the 22s at the same time.) Hubby complimented me. I felt purdy. I got comments about how I lost weight. I had packed my protein shakes and sucralose drops.

And then I slipped, bit by bit from the plan.

What's amazing to me is how LITTLE I ate (compared to bashes past), how much I had to STOP myself from "that little bit more", and yet now MUCH it added up to. I mean, to have to use that much energy to pull back,  and yet still cave here and there...damn. I have far to go before I sleep. Miles.

Yah, sure, if I used to eat 3500 to 4000 calories at parties, half seems like a lot less. But from the perspective of a "goal weight eater" that's almost 400 above my limit--which means it's enough to regain over a short amount of time if I were goal weight and ate like that.

Won't break it down for each meal--I'm still bleary from all the sodium from supper, but not one meal I ate went over 1000 calories. But it doesn't take a binge to gain. It simply takes more than one off plan meal.

One of those meals was Chinese (we took our nephew out to a comic book/anime store and then to one of his fave restaurants for late supper).

I wanted to weep that I couldn't have my usual "past fat eating" faves, and still I went over plan. Damn.

Anyway, scale says 250.8

The only reason it isn't showing more Chinese food bloat is cause I drank tons of tea and lots of water (12 glasses) and hit the potassium (green magma, coconut water). That's 1 pound up scale-wise from Friday's new low.

I feel beyond embarrassed. I feel foolish.

I want to see the 240's again fast!

Already told hubby no nice Sunday dinner outing. It's stay home and start making up for the overage. Lots of water! Lots of tea! Roasted chicken and protein shakes and papaya for debloating.

I think I had a deficit in calories for the week until yesterday--so I need to calculate how much I need to make up (if any) of if I just start clean slate. Not sure. Will look at my caloric totals and see.

The DDDY Challenge weigh-in is tomorrow, no? (First weigh-in was on a Monday, so I'm assuming).

Anyway, glad there isn't a family birthday party for a few weeks. Sigh.

Worried About Weigh-In....meh

Yeah, so I went over my calories by close to 500 cals. No excuse other than I was lazy and indulgent. And I haven't broken the salt addiction. I just seem to want really salty stuff this week. Olives. Pickled peppers. Cheddar cheese. Salty eggs. Salty miso.

I think the salt and overage in calories is gonna doom tomorrow's weigh-in.

Unlike times past when I would just skip a weigh-in that might be unfavorable, I'm getting on the scale, be the news bad, very bad, or horribly bad.

Accountability is part of the purpose of this goal-oriented bloggy journal and journey. If I do poorly, that needs documenting. It needs to be right here, goading me towards better planning and change.

So, stay tuned for tomorrow's scale-y result.

And I hope your week has been more disciplined and on-target than mine.

Happy Thursday, what's left of it. Off to enjoy the cutiepie on The Mentalist! A hottie can take one's mind off food. Yes?